Struggle for pleasure
by Five seas
Summary: AU. When Soi moved away to start a new life, the pain unsurprisingly followed her across the globe. But when she found herself in the middle of a whirlpool of problems only she can solve, she was surprised to find a healer as well. SoiSun yuri go figure.
1. Disturbia

_Author:_ I don't own Bleach, or anything that happens to get mentioned in this fic

_Alter ego_: Jeez, can't you come up with something more original?

_Author_: Well, this fic is something I'm not used to...

_Alter ego_: You're writing it as an apolog for ruining Chizuru in "My sweet lesbian". Care to rate this?

_Author:_ Oh, I don't know. Probably T, although with all the language and situations it might turn M...although it would be a little presumptious, don't you think?

_Alter ego:_ Since when are you asking me? You've seen fics far more presumptious than this one, haven't you.

_Author:_ Oh well, rating can change...if readers ask for it. Until then, enjoy...Songs for this chapter-_Disturbia_ by Rihanna and _Struggle for pleasure_ by Wim Mertens (any order will do)

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* * *

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_It was like the tingling of bells. Their touches were as gentle and sweet as the caress of raindrops, and twice as addictive. The world was black and silver, all cold lights and abandon. She closed her eyes and gave into her caresses…_

This was one hell of a fucked up season.

Two wind currents had collided over the Northeast of Asia, which, combined with the high pressure and lay of the region resulted in a hot and stuffy weather…in the Early March.

As if that wasn't bad enough, the slim chances of rain made the airlines a little too optimistic, and made them take on too many appointments. Soi Fong cursed as she wiped the beads of sweat from her forehead and grabbed her bags from the converter. In the end, the plane had to roam over the Tokyo airport until there was a free strip for it to land. The passengers, already edgy and uncomfortable thanks to the twelve hour flight, were contemplating a riot by the time the descend started, and a few old ladies, driven to hysterics thanks to everything, had started panicking that the fuel was out and that the plane was crashing down.

Saying that she was glad to get out of the airport was an understatement. Only the years she'd spent fencing held her back from screaming and stomping out, throwing a fit. Ok, the fencing, and the years she'd spent dealing with unruly teenagers.

As she went through the schedules for the buses, Soi suddenly felt glad that she'd made the necessary arrangements a few months ahead. Just the thought of having to find a hotel, to check in, to fill in papers, just for a quick shower before she ran ahead to meet the principle of Shirakawa Academy…and that would be before she underwent the hell of finding an apartment…No, that was better.

The ride through the city took her thirty minutes, locating the complex-another half an hour. By the time she finished discussing some things with her landlord (no men after nine o'clock and you'll pay your bills on time), Soi was wondering if it would be acceptable to meet principle Yamamoto dressed in a sweat-soaked T-shirt and cargo pants.

* * *

_Her hands were cold. She noticed it immediately, although it was the painful burn of the ice, but a soft hum of water. Slender fingers danced on her stomach, edging closer and closer until…Until the air around them got so hot they couldn't breathe._

Sun-sun woke up with the sound of screaming in her ears. For a few minutes, she stared at the ceiling, wondering if this was reality or perhaps she was still sleeping. Nobody had argued so loudly in the house since…well, since her father married Momo. She wiped the thin layer of sweat from her neck and thought for the nth time that she had to see someone for those dreams.

There was a thud and the floor shook.

"Oh, no! I'm awake…" She sighed and got off.

When she exited her room, the voices got louder. As she reached the top of the stairs, she saw Apache and Luppi kneeling on the floor in front of the study's door, listening hard. She frowned slightly-why on Earth would those two waste time lying there, you could tell what was going on from where she stood. Soundlessly, she walked behind her sister and slid down on the floor with her side against the wall.

"So, Mila-Rose dropped the bomb, didn't she?" her voice was emotionless-it had the kind of tone people used when they knew, or didn't care for the answer.

"Yup. Dad's blowing a fuse right now." Apache was grinning widely.

_"…I WILL NOT PERMIT THIS! PREGNANT OR NOT, YOU ARE NOT GETTING ANYWHERE NEAR ENGAGED WITH THAT APE!"_

_"AND WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO ABOUT IT?!"_ The only person in the entire family that had enough voice for an all-out verbal battle with Sosuke Aizen was his daughter Mila-Rose. "_IT'S ALREADY DONE, YOU BASTARD! YOU CAN'T DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT?!"_

_"AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR LIFE? YOUR PROSPECTS? YOUR PLANS FOR THE FUTURE?! I'M NOT PAYING YOUR TUITION FEES SO THAT YOU COULD DROP OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE TERM AND MARRY SOME GUY THAT'S NOT EVEN GRADUATED YET!"_

_"Please, no need to raise your voice?!"_ Momo's voice was tiny compared to that of her husband and daughter, and still she soldiered on _"Think of what the neighbors will say! They can probably hear you!"_

At that, Luppi, Apache and Sun-sun quickly ran into the kitchen, and made it just on time-the door of the study opened to reveal a red-faced Aizen. He wasn't raging, but it was good that he didn't find the eavesdroppers-the veins on his forehead were out like telephone cables under the wallpaper.

_"Mila-Rose…"_ he continued, closing the door and turning back to his daughter. His three younger children, armed with glasses, went back to their previous occupation _"…you spend in university is a time of…study, exploration, experimenting. I understand that you wanted to understand about life and I will close my eyes to the fact that you've been so reckless, but you have to consider! Women today are very misunderstood. Being an independent woman is very rare, and that's why it's also very prestigious. It shows that you not only have the capability, but also the courage and the determination to make it alone in a man's world. You've told me so yourself, when you decided to take up engineering, and I accepted your decision."_

_"So is that your tactic? Turn my beliefs against me?"_ Mila-Rose's voice was rising again _"I'm not giving up on my dream, or beliefs here, Dad! But I also love him, and I want us to be together."_

_"Have I ever stopped you from seeing anyone? Even though I was never content with your choice, I've never forbidden it!"_

_"But you are now! How can you be so unfeeling?!"_

_"Mila-Rose, you may say that you want this, but I bet you don't even begin to comprehend what the consequences of this might be. You'll have to drop out, and when you do, there's no going back until that child would know how to take care of itself, and by that time, you'd have lost the advantage you have-the advantage of youth."_

_"So what ARE you suggesting? That I abort the child? This isn't just a thing, Dad, it's my baby! Your grandson!"_

_"The only reason you want to marry this man is because of this child. The only reason he'd stay with you is for its sake. I will give him credit for that, but when it becomes too much for him, he'll leave you, and you'll end up alone, poor, and dependant-all those are things you wanted to avoid."_

_"Are you even listening to yourself?! Credit? Dependency? You are such a bastard sometimes, I can't believe you?!"_

_"Instead of arguing with me, can you give me at least one solid evidence that there is a point in this marriage?"_

_"Solid evidence? He LOVES me, I LOVE him, and we are having a baby, whether you like it or not?!"_

_"I will not permit this marriage!"_

_"Well, I don't give a flying fuck, and neither does he! Why can't you be glad that we've bothered to come here to ASK for your blessing, when we could've just ran off to Holland?!"_

Sun-sun left her glass in the kitchen sink and headed upstairs, her brow furrowing in distaste. She knew well enough just where this was going. Her sister would come out, dragging her fiancé out of the house, slam doors and Momo would come out, trying to calm her down and make everyone look normal for the neighbors.

She sighed and sat down on her bed. Downstairs, the Armageddon was on the verge of exploding, so she got her i-pod out and turned on the first song that came on. As the loud beat resonated in her ears, she eased back on the mat and let her mind drift away.

_**What's wrong with me?  
Why do I feel like this?  
I'm going crazy now**_

The pages of her file whispered, but Soi Fong didn't look up. She knew well enough that Yamamoto-san was well acquainted with it, and she waited patiently for him to finish. She could just picture him-tall, broad, impeccably dressed, with a long beard and fuzzy eyebrows-a man that never seemed to change. Every time she saw him, or even talked to him, he made her feel like a naughty schoolgirl-Thank God she had had time to wash herself and put on a suit.

"Well then…" Yamamoto-san left the folder and looked up at her "I hope that your trip was uneventful, Soi Fong-san."

"Nothing of consequence happened, Yamamoto-san." She answered politely

"I must thank you for answering our request so quickly. I understand that getting a working visa, an accommodation, a transfer…it must've been very troublesome."

"Not in the least. I have a double citizenship for Japan and the United States of America, getting a visa was the easiest part."

"I hope that your lodgings suit your needs."

"They are sufficient."

"Well, your record is acceptable." Yamamoto said "The students you've taught have done remarkably well on the school-leaving exams, and most of them have been accepted in prestigious universities."

"Yes, Yamamoto-san."

"You teach English?"

"Yes." Soi answered, feeling a weight in her stomach at the thought of the question that was bound to come next.

"What was the reason for your leaving your last occupation?" Oh, he knew damn well why she left, but he wanted to hear her say it. Controlling men! Soi took a deep breath to calm herself…or her voice at least.

"There was a complaint filed against me by the family of a student."

"She said that you were…sexually harassing her…" Yamamoto-san added calmly. Soi narrowed her eyes-if he wanted to play like that, she wasn't going to sink to that level.

"Yamamoto-san, let us be open about it. The police did a throughout investigation, and I cooperated completely during it. They found nothing, simply because there wasn't anything to be found. The girl that filed the complaint was lately discovered to be a schizophrenic, and at that time, I was engaged." Well, had an affair, but it was always more prestigious to say engaged. "There was never a trial, because the parents of the girl hushed it up before they were publicly humiliated, but since 's is a Catholic Girls School, my presence would've been an inconvenience both for me and for them."

"I understand you completely." Yamamoto arranged her papers before handling them back to her "I want you to know what we believe you and that we're sure that you're no threat to the health and life of the students. We wouldn't have recruited you if it was otherwise. I hope that your fiancé takes the separation well."

"Actually, I'm no longer engaged. He…didn't stick around long enough to hear all the revelations on the case." That cowardly bastard "I will do my best to help my students, but I warn you, I will not tolerate such treatment. I want you to trust me, I am not the kind of person to do such things."

"I believe you, and if such a case comes up again, you will have my support. However…" he eyed her critically. "…I was wondering if you could do something about your hair? Even though this is probably the…modern trend in the USA, this is a conservative academy. It would be best if you weren't too…extraordinaire in your looks."

"This hairstyle isn't the trend, but it's easy to keep, Yamamoto-san. It's also easy to tie and hide some….things." like the fact that she was female. God, it would be so easy to hide her gender in this school, she thought. If she wore pants every day and refrained from jewelry, her students would never know. Nature had made that so laughably EASY!

"Ah, very good." The principle nodded "You understand that we shouldn't encourage…inappropriate emotions in our students, don't you?"

"I understand completely."

"Very well then." He reached over the desk and shook her hand. "The opening ceremony is tomorrow. You will be introduced to your class after it. I look forward to working with you."

"So do I." Soi Fong nodded, before exiting the office.

* * *

Sun-sun smoothened her white school blazer and then looked at her reflection in the mirror. She looked like a ghost-all white clothes and black hair, she seemed so pale, so…lifeless. She already craved for the next break, and an opportunity to wear her own clothes. As it was, they were put away and locked up.

A tap on the door tore her away from her reflections and she rose to her feet to greet her father.

"Getting ready for school, I see." Sosuke Aizen smiled brightly, although his eyes remained detached. Sun-sun always had the feeling that they were blocks of ice. Oh, please, don't let him give her the Speech "This is your senior year, Sun-sun…" damn it! "You must study vigorously, as it's very important that you get into a university. Do you understand?"

"I do. Getting into medicine is extremely hard, father." She said nonchalantly.

"Indeed. But being a medic is a very noble profession, and it's worth it. You must show commitment…and strength of character. Your mother and I expect a lot from you."

"I understand." She nodded "Then I shall go take Apache, Luppi and Tesla and head towards school. We mustn't be late for the opening ceremony."

"Indeed." Aizen nodded "Off with you then."

Sun-sun pursed her lips as she walked off with her brothers and sister. Yesterday, Mila-Rose had successfully pissed him off and broken up with him. Their family was getting smaller despite the fact that they were over the average number for this country. And now, when it was made clear that he was one daughter less, he had to re-arrange his ambitions on the others.

If it wasn't for the fact that she really did want to be a doctor, she'd have told him off as well.

* * *

Soi studied her image in the bathroom mirror one last time before she nodded contentedly. The clothes were simple, all clean lines and soft, black material. The jacket fell feely without showing any curves off, but it didn't cling, which meant that people wouldn't take her for a cross-dresser. Her hair was ruthlessly tied back, the short lock only falling around her face like dry hay. With a pair of glasses she was ready to go.

The opening ceremony wasn't much different from what she'd known in the USA-the principle held a speech, reminded to the students their duties and obligations…perhaps the only thing that differed was the fact that the students were sitting on the ground and their parents-in the corners of the room. The perfect discipline clamed her-even in St. Rebecca's, the order hadn't been so great. Perhaps it was because Yamamoto-sensei wasn't loud and angry, like the nuns that preached about chastity and religion.

No, the principle of Shirakawa academy was the kind of person that spoke of authority with every gesture he made. His very presence demanded respect, and the people around him got an instinctive urge to obey his commands. As she ran her eyes through the room, she couldn't help but wonder-no paper airplanes flying around, no notes were exchanged, not a whisper echoed in the room…It was a miracle. But then again, it was also a miracle that she got an offer that helped her leave the states in the middle of the school year-in Japan, it started in March and nobody would be suspicious. Thank God. She'd broken enough taboos as it was.

* * *

Sun-sun read absent-mindedly her book of haiku and then stared out the window: Hana chirite ko no aida no tera narikeri. The sakura falls off and the temple peeks behind the trees…It suited the season, although the cherry blossoms had only began to show from underneath the winter snow. However, the branches remained naked, plain, and the school, the temple of knowledge, was hidden behind it.

She turned her eyes away from the view and looked at her class. They were supposed to talk to their new homeroom teacher, get to know him, and receive their duties for the term.

The entry of principle Yamamoto caused everyone to shut up immediately and sit down. He gave the class a look from underneath his eyebrows, then said:

"You know well that I don't like giving speeches, so I'll keep this short-due to Kurimoto-sensei's sudden…retirement, you've been deprived both of a homeroom master and an English teacher. However, we're in luck-Soi Fong-sensei, who received a master's degree in English in Harvard three years ago, has agreed to come all the way from the united states to teach you. I hope that all of you work well together." He gave them all a warning look, and then nodded to someone at the door. "I leave you to talk."

Sun-sun watched with detached interest as he exited the room and handed the class journal to the person in the corridor. A few students extended their necks to get a better look, but before they could see anything, their new teacher came in.

It didn't hit her at first. Not at once. There was a strange twist in her gut that made her more careful, but it wasn't until Soi Fong-sensei faced them that she realized what it was. And then…then…what happened afterwards was that she died and was revived in a millisecond.

* * *

A/N-Phiew, finally rid of her (alter ego). Now, seriously, what do you think of this? Do you want me to continue? Share your thoughts.


	2. This is me

Song for this chapter: This is me, from the Camp Rock soundtrack

* * *

The woman standing in front of the class was amazing. At first you couldn't see it, because of the totally…masculine way she wore herself, but Sun-sun couldn't take her eyes off her and for some reason, her heart had stopped beating.

There was absolutely no doubt that the person in front of her was a woman. The pants and jacket she wore were both simply cut and a little large, but they couldn't hide the beauty of her body. Sun-sun knew what it was, the catlike grace-her sister's fiancé Ggio Vega was, in a way, like a feline, but she'd never seen such flexibility and beauty, and in a creature so unfeminine as her new teacher. Even if she had walked in wearing a potato sack, she still would've kept that strange, savage glory. She didn't walk, but prowl. She didn't turn around to see them, she whirled. She didn't talk, she purred.

Soi Fong sensei was, by all means, a tigress in human form. Even her features were sharp and decisive, with blue eyes, piercing and bright like daggers. That woman could give Yamamoto-sensei a run for his money-every move she made spoke of power, everything about her demanded respect.

* * *

She leaned back on the wall and eyed her class, wondering what they were thinking. They saw a person in front of them, a genderless, asexual and senseless being-it was now that they decided that they liked her or not. If the first, they would work well. If the second, they would turn away from her and their senior year would be ruined.

"Yamamoto-sensei already told you my name." Soi said, and wrote the kanji on the blackboard, along with her number. "Since I will be your form master for the following year and your English teacher, I believe that instead of telling you what my expectations of you are, it's better to make things clear. I do not know how you worked with your previous teacher, and I do not care. For your sake, you must study and get the best out of the studies this Academy offers you. I hope that we're all on the same page here."

Twenty sets of eyes blinked automatically. They seemed rather taken aback, but there was curiosity peeking through. Soi didn't change her facial expression as she walked in front of her desk and sat on the edge, without getting her gaze off her class.

"I am not your confessor, your friend or your babysitter. I will not have any nonsense when I'm teaching, and I will not accept your slacking off _any_ class just because you have something against the colleague, or you dislike the subject, or you are just lazy. There are things in life we do, whether we want to or not, and if you want to be treated like the adults you _are_, you will act like ones and take responsibility for your actions."

"However…" she continued in the same tone of voice "…I am not a guard, a warden or a monster that has come to chain you to the desks and feed you knowledge until you explode. If you have problems that can justify a lack of homework, or you just have something that is on your mind, you will come to me _first_ and tell me about it, and I will do all that is in my power to give you a delay in which you _will_ solve your problem and normalize your life." At that, she saw one of the girls on the front row, by the window, twitch nervously. Their eyes met briefly before she went back to her speech.

"If anything, I am your teacher, and if anything interferes with your academic success, I will deal with it. Everything you share with me will be treated with the uttermost seriousness, so do not play me for a fool with ridiculous requests. Do not underestimate me either-nothing is too _personal_ or too _private_. I have spent the last three years teaching in a Catholic School in the United States of America-I have seen things that you couldn't even begin to imagine." Like that field trip last summer…now THAT had been a week worth remembering.

"We can work together and find a solution to everything…" she said finally "…or we can try and outdo each other, turning this year for a hell for everyone. Personally, I'd like to think that you have outgrown such childishness, and are intelligent enough. Am I right?"

Energetic nods.

"Good. Now, I'd like the person who put the glue on my chair to take it away and bring me a new one." Soi Fong said as she got the class journal out and opened it "That goes for all the plastic snakes in the drawers, all the gum on the bottom of the desk, and all the other dirty traps you've set in this room for me."

The readiness in which a few boys started to empty the drawers told her all. On the inside, Soi Fong grinned triumphantly-Flawless victory!

* * *

They had just finished the annoying details about the paperwork and everyone was preparing to leave, when she remembered one more thing.

"Aizen Sun-sun-san?"

The violet-eyed girl that had caught her attention earlier looked up. "That would be me."

"Ah…Can you please come here for a second?"

She nodded and walked towards her. How strange-everything that child did seemed slow, from her walking to the way her hair fell around her shoulders. Soi Fong didn't even realize that she was before her until she spoke up: "Sensei?"

"Ah…err…Oh, yes. You're Aizen-san, aren't you? Yamamoto-sensei told me that you're the class representative." She relaxed slightly-had she expected some sort of punishment?

"Yes. Since junior year." Aizen Sun-sun answered, livening up somehow "I hope that we will meet your expectations, sensei."

"And I hope I will meet yours. Since I have absolutely no idea how to go about this, I will be frank-I know nothing of this school, nothing of it's culture, or the habits in teacher-student relationships. Yamamoto-sensei told me to address the class representative with any questions I might have. I understand that perhaps you will be busy today, but I hope that in the next week, you could arrange for a tour and have somebody explain to me how things are."

"That would be unnecessary, sensei. We won't be studying today, so I'm available to show you around right now."

"Well, that's great." Soi smiled "Then I'll just drop the journal off and I'll be right with you, Aizen-san."

"Please, sensei, call me Sun-sun." the girl said with a strange voice. Soi paused to look at her-suddenly, she seemed wary and tired. How did something like that upset her so?

* * *

Sun-sun waited calmly for her new teacher to straighten things up and come to her, feeling her mood become as insipid as the weather outside. There was nothing to do-her siblings were all over the school, signing up for different clubs or meeting up with their friends. Apache was probably planning some sort of mischief right now, Luppi was discussing clothes with the fashionable kids, and Tesla was…most likely sitting on some bench, waiting for everyone to gather up.

She frowned-of all her brothers and sisters, Tesla was probably the only one who inspired feelings resembling fondness in her. He was always so closed up, so quiet, so repressed…almost like her, minus her lack of interest in what people said.

It was only natural, when you thought about it. Mila-Rose had always been the wild child, and since she hooked up with Ggio Vega she was completely out of control. Sun-sun had been the one making lunches and checking homework, covering up for the younger ones and making false excuses for Luppi's bad notes and Apache's constant pranks. The last thing she cared about was what people said, she was completely self-sufficient.

But Tesla…Tesla was a different case. He had a soul that was surprisingly sensitive, knowing who his parents were. He couldn't make friends, or pretend. He couldn't stand up for himself. He was bullied by Loli and Menoly, for Christ's sake! Those girls were two years younger than him and wore skirts smaller than his belt, and they bullied HIM! Sometimes…

But she couldn't do anything to change him, could she now? Sun-sun shook her head. Nobody had taught her how to live, Tesla had to learn the same way-through falling and getting back on his legs.

As for home, she couldn't go back so early. She'd have to listen to her father rant about Mila-Rose's sudden marriage and she'd get another headache. No, it was better doing something constructive.

"I'm sorry for making you wait." Soi Fong-sensei said as she exited the teacher's room "From where do we start, Aizen-san?"

"Sun-sun, sensei." She corrected her "There are enough Aizens in this school as it is."

"Alright. Then you should call me Soi Fong. Everyone calls me that."

"With all due respect, sensei, that would be inappropriate. I only told you to call me by my first name because it would be more convenient. My brother's in the same class as it is, and we have plenty of siblings."

"Oh…I see…" she seemed taken aback, but soon enough, she nodded and followed her through the corridor.

* * *

Time began to flow again. It was strange, how Soi hadn't noticed it before, but the interval between the scandal with her student and the beginning of a new school year had been in a standstill for her. Food had lost its taste, the world was boring gray, and the headaches had been almost constant from all the fights and the accusations.

Now it was different. Now she had something interesting to look forward to. Her new students had a good level of English, almost proficient, but their previous teacher hadn't been very ambitious, and that in turn had made them rather lazy. As soon as she realized that they didn't need the grammar explained to them, she decided that it would be a waste to throw their abilities away with silly things and introduced them to serious literature.

"Shakespeare's sonnets?" one boy had exclaimed when she first told them what they would be doing in English class "But those are extremely hard!"

"We won't look at each and every of them, of course. We have to go over a few plays as well." Soi said, a feral smile on her lips

"But this isn't what we did with…and anyways, we're not ready for such language! Shakespeare has such a complex way of expression…"

"Which you think you won't be able to handle? All of you have excellent notes, and most of you are on a Cambridge Advanced Level of English, if not Proficient. It would be a waste both of time and efforts to go over the same rules and exceptions all year, since you've probably already memorized them by heart. It's for your best interest to take on things that will challenge you."

"Yes, but still…"

"Some elite universities aren't satisfied with a certificate of your knowing the language." Soi interacted, knowing best that the word 'university' was the key to those kids' heads "And even if you don't need to be a master in English literature, you still have to possess some knowledge that would give a certain depth to your arguments. Besides, don't tell me you guys aren't bored of grammar already."

It had been strange, but she'd began getting along with them almost from the start. Whether it was because she had this authoritative air about her, or because she was closer to them in age and understanding, her class (and all the others she taught), were diligent and punctual when it came to her subject.

Soi soon discovered that the school was unique in many ways. The students had to attend at least two extracurricular activities, from sports teams trough art clubs, all the way to extra French lessons. The close family of the teachers didn't have to pay for a full tuition, but they were separated in a different class, so that there wouldn't be a conflict of interests. Her counterpart in English, Matsumoto Rangiku, had spent nearly five years in Boston University, working on a master's degree, and while she was competent enough, Soi couldn't rid herself of the feeling that she spent most of the time drinking men under the tables than studying.

Most of the teachers were strange, at best. The reason was probably because Yamamoto-sensei had gathered up the best who hadn't been able to get a department in Todai, and they were all very different. There were the reserved ones, like Kuchiki Byakuya-sensei, who taught Japanese literature, and Unohana-sensei, who taught biology; there were the passionate ones, like Kurotsuchi Mayuri, who scared the shit out of everyone who came in his physics class, and those like Zaraki Kenpachi who worked everyone out of their wits in gym class. And then there were those who Soi Fong couldn't even begin to imagine in a school. Because Yamamoto-sensei had decided that art and music were important, the students had such classes until the end of their curriculum. It was all well and good, but the music teacher, Grimmajaw Jaegerjaques, was an undiscovered rock star who made his classes remember the discography of White Snake by heart, and the one who taught art, Nnoitra Jiruga, was downright scary.

Soi Fong was, by nature, a solitary person, and, quite easily, took up to the company of Kuchiki-sensei and Unohana-sensei. Both preferred to let their actions speak for themselves, and they valued silence and tact more than anything else. She had a chance to go out with them to a nearby bar after work and share a few drinks in a comfortable atmosphere, which won her over immediately. It was so much different from her days in university, when she'd been stupid enough to sign up for a sorority house and end up doing only-God-knows-what things just to be accepted. Initiation in a group of friends had never been this easy, and they seemed to enjoy her company even when they didn't speak much.

And when they did speak, the conversation was mercifully light and engaging. They all taught different subjects and had, naturally, different interests. But some things were always there, like discipline or the lack of such.

Soon enough, Soi had discovered why Aizen Sun-sun had asked her to call her by her first name. There were so many Aizens in that school that she had been taken aback. It wasn't just Sun-sun's twin brother Luppi; they had a sister, who was a sophomore and always played tricks on people, and a brother in junior class. Other than that, there were two twin sisters in the middle school, and when she had checked the school records to make sure she wasn't losing her mind, she had found out that there was also a young boy in kindergarten and a recent graduate that carried the same surname, and were, by all means, Sun-sun's siblings. It had been…shocking, at best. To find out that a family could have eight children (registered in the school lists) was beyond anything she had been taught. While her mother was Japanese and valued family above everything else, and her father's grandparents had fled from China during World War Two, their values were overly old-fashioned.

She'd never had any siblings, even though they were pretty well off and lived in a fairly good neighborhood. Her father and mother, both reserved and quiet, had decided that having only one child was enough, and that a male heir to the family name was hardly a problem. They had raised her like they would've raised a son, and they had never indulged into some public display of affection, even in front of her. Of course, she knew that families weren't all like hers, but still, eight children, and with such slim difference in age…Soi couldn't help wondering how that poor woman put up with Sun-sun's father. Surely, it was one hell of a family.

"Aizen Sosuke-san?" Unohana-sensei had seemed surprised when Soi brought the subject up "I have met him briefly on parents-teachers conferences, but he doesn't look exceptionally well off. I suppose that, in a country with such a small demographical growth as Japan, families like his are well desired."

"If you can handle all those kids. Honestly, I don't envy his wife."

"I believe that there was a certain…dispute in the family." Kuchiki-sensei cut in, carefully avoiding the topic of reproduction "His present wife is not the mother of his elder children. It is not often discussed, because their academic success is impressive, and Yamamoto-sensei did not wish to discriminate them. However…"

The sentence hung in the air ominously. Soi knew well enough that divorce, along with homosexuality and illegitimate offspring was a forbidden theme for public conversations, but she still felt a bit frustrated that the closest thing she had to a friend at present was such a…crustie.

"They are all very bright children." Unohana-sensei came to the rescue "However, Aizen-san seems to take a more eager interest in their marks than their happiness. Apache-san constantly makes messes in the hallways, but he doesn't seem to care if she brings home perfect scores."

"Well, I suppose that every parent has his ways of educating his children." Kuchiki Byakuya surmised. Soi couldn't do much but nod…

However, she couldn't help feeling compassionate towards her student. She had seen her, and her brother, and from the way they behaved, she had deduced that Sun-sun was probably the one looking after the younger ones. She's never been a spoiled one, and looking after a whole class of students, she had some idea of how she must feel, but the responsibility and moral weight was nowhere as big towards strangers than towards your family.

"She must have it very hard on her…" Soi mumbled inaudibly as she finished her drink and called it quits for the night.

* * *

A/N-So, how do you find this so far? Should I continue, of should I erase it? Personally, I wanted to make Soi Fong a little less open, but I wanted to turn her into a good teacher. I know it's a little strange, since there's no definition for it, but I've noticed that students react better to people who command respect, and I wanted to make her like that.

So....have I succeeded?


	3. Cinderella

Pick whatever "Cinderella" song you like.

* * *

It was a policy of hers never to pick her nose into other people's business. The sheer mortification she got from it was nothing compared to the fact that usually her entire life went down the drain when she meddled. The last time it had happened was with that student of hers in America.

She had had a wholly different idea when she applied for a Catholic School. She expected discipline, humbleness, quiet and self-centered students…Come to think about it, Soi had gotten what she wanted, but ended up with a lot more than she bargained for. Honestly, she thought that she could make it, and when a student had asked her help for an unconventional paper on poetry, she should've refused. She should've known that there wasn't a place for "unconventional" in a family that attends Morning Mass.

Mercifully, work piled up and she was capable of putting crazed students out of her mind. Teachers got sick easily so they had to fill up for them whenever they could. That way, she got to know the better part of the Aizen siblings, and by the end of October, she also got to know the worst.

Apache was a minx indeed, but it didn't take a genius to figure out she was looking for attention by showing off. Normally, Soi found such behavior common among the teenage boys, but the remedy was always the same-once you showed them you're not impressed, they ceased to waste their efforts. Tesla, on the other hand, showed once every two classes, and he usually spent most of the time drabbling something on the back of his notebook. Soi wanted to give him a piece of her mind first, but then she figured out that it was best to let him be. He was always ready with a response and his homework was done on time. This discovery would've been amazing, had it not been for the fact that his autistic behavior didn't fit into the background. Neither Sun-sun, not any of his other siblings seemed to care that Tesla was different from the other children, and his parents hadn't given any special instructions to the teachers, which was weird. Parents with genius children usually became overprotective of them, and he seemed right the opposite.

* * *

It wasn't until one of the middle-school teachers got sick and she filled in for her in the class of Loli and Menoly, that she figured out what was probably going on.

Their week together started off with the usual ancient tricks, which she promptly failed to fall for, sulking and bad behavior. Soi chose not to waste her time with motivational speeches, since their regular teacher would come back and mess them up again, and moved straight to the piles of homework and unexpected questions with bad marks. Yamamoto-sensei had given her full leaf to write whatever marks she chose, and the first day the class journal was full of some very discouraging numbers.

Fear seemed to work on some of them, but as for Sun-sun's twin sisters, they seemed to oppose her with all they had. One blond, the other a brunette, they sat on the first row with sly smiles and a bag full of ideas how to annoy her. At first she paid no attention, but when she noticed that they were positively ruling the class, she had to look into it further.

On Monday, she noticed how much influence they had on the class. On Tuesday, she saw that they were practically drowning in coffee and energy drinks. On Wednesday, when she realized that their grades weren't affected in anyway despite what she, or they, did, Soi was determined to find out what was going on.

* * *

The same night, she gave up trying to set un an interesting plan for the next lesson, and set her plan in action. Her things had been delivered the previous weekend, but many boxes were unpacked-some because of the lack of time, some because she didn't wish to. The one she opened had remained sealed for the second reason for quite a long time, but…drastic times called for drastic measures.

The trunk opened with some difficulty and the smell of naphthalene made her wrinkle her nose, but thankfully, it had kept the clothes inside safe from moths. Soi hesitated, as she pulled out one thing after another, looking over the fabrics and prints. Some of them were the garments she wore as a child, some of them went even further…they were mostly things you knew you'd have no use for, and yet you kept because you are fond of them. And in the bottom…

She didn't even bother to look at the thing as she dragged it out, she didn't hold it up before the mirror to see if it fit her. She knew it did. She had made sure it did.

After a quick shower and a generous dose of make-up and perfume, Soi adjusted the black halter top and matching tight pants, carefully running her fingers over the silvery stitches and bows laced through the front. They were really useless, but it made the thing a bit more sexy, and she had to look at least that in order to get where she wanted to be.

The night was chilly, but thankfully she had already made up a list of places to check, all in the route between the school and the neighborhood where most of her students lived. At the first three pubs and discos, she wasn't very lucky, and there were places where even her grown-woman attitude didn't get her in. Sometimes she was blessed with her short height, but more often, she was cursed because of it.

Luckily, her search was fruitful the first night, and she found herself in front of a club in around eleven PM, watching people make out in the shadows around the entrance and smoking under the vent. It helped her that most of them were high-scholars and students-it meant the place was popular, but the push and flashy head-sign, combined with the not-so-obvious way in told her that it didn't follow regulations as strictly as other places. Soi's suspicion was confirmed when she recognized a couple of boys throwing up in a nearby trashcan as third-year middle scholars from Shirakawa Academy.

* * *

She didn't go in the first night, but brought a tape recorder to the school for some listening exercises to make sure she was right. By the anguish written on her students' faces, it seemed clear that they had been out the previous night.

The second time she went on a stake-out, Soi went early in the club and settled in a small table in the back from where she got a good look on the dance floor and bathrooms at the same time. Then she prepared to wait.

Sure enough, when the night advanced, people started flooding in, and the majority of them were students. Soi watched as they flashed fake IDs and started dancing on that chaotic mix people called music nowadays. She had had a pianist for a roommate for an year, and she knew enough about harmony and symphony to know that this was totally wrong. The misplaced beat, the wailing machinery, all mixed with sounds only cats in Tuscany made…it was stupid, but it wasn't the reason kids danced to it. No, it provided them with a good excuse to grope in a crowd without being noticed.

Soi sighed as she spotted a not-so-small group of kids from her own class, led, of course, by Loli and Menoly, settle on the bar for a fueling up before they hit the dance floor. She'd seen it so many times that she felt she really shouldn't feel surprised or shocked by it, and every time, she felt for those kids. They did tolerably enough, they didn't raise suspicion, they were bored and decided to get a little thrill by acting like adults. Porn on the net, discos at night, some pathetic excuses for dry humping that sometimes led to one mistake or another in the bathroom…and then they expected that they would be forgiven because they were still kids? Someone needed to teach them that responsibility comes with privileges, and yet they never learned.

Still, Soi Fong came from a society where teen pregnancies and mass drug usage was, if not common, then at least not unexpected. She'd thought that her second homeland would have stricter parents and…different mentalities, especially the Aizen family. Knowing how strict the father was, Soi expected that he exercised bigger control on his progenies, and she was proven wrong.

Oh well. There were the parents who saw genius where it would never bloom, and there were those who denied the simplest of talents even if they took their eyes out. Still...it was an interference, and she had to put some rain on those students' behavior, before they did something that would cause a scandal. She could see that they hadn't gone beyond the reach of reason…

Or fear.

Grinning widely, she got off her chair and walked towards the bar-too far from them to hear their conversation, but close enough for them to see her.

"Gin and tonic." She told the bar tender in a low, husky voice, while leaning to show him her ID card. Her right shoulder moved upward, showing her back to her students and a good portion of her cleavage to the man standing next to her. Judging by the smell of alcohol coming from him, he was pretty much far gone, but everything went well as far as his eyes were concerned, because he locked them on the spot just as she'd expected.

Minutes later they were on the dance floor, and if the Aizen twins and Co hadn't noticed her yet, the display she put up was enough to draw their eyes on her. Her partner hardly kept his feet, but he could muster enough energy to hold on her waist and that was all she needed. It was almost laughable, the way they all submitted to her if she showed a little skin.

Yes, people overseas weren't exactly practiced into this sort of dancing. Soi herself wasn't what you'd call a pro, but she had a strong body and she knew how to work it. She closed her eyes and gave into the rhythm, letting her arms and legs flex. As the song progressed, she slowly became more and more aware of her surroundings. There was alcohol spilled on the counter, someone was smoking very strong cigars, too many people shouted over the music…The whole atmosphere was suffocating, she needed out…

However, Soi Fong wasn't the type of woman that gave no compromises. She always won Canadian wrestling, even if it meant that she couldn't feel her fingers for weeks after. Instead of giving up, she set up a faster pace and let her head whip back to get the air moving. Her hips and shoulders moved tentatively while one of her knees parted his legs and she pressed sideways to him. She flashed him a feral grin, before bending back and letting her hands fall. Then she straightened up, circled her hands around his neck and grinded her body to his.

Unfortunately, the poor guy couldn't handle more than one dance, but it seemed to be enough-Loli and Menoly and the rest of their classmates were already away from the bar as if it was on fire.

* * *

The week she spent as a substitute ended and Soi gave into a blissful rest. Just to make sure, she had visited the club again, but the students didn't come, and she was pretty sure that they would cower away for a while.

She slept for the greater part of the Saturday, then lied in her bed reading and listening to music, before she finally got up and arranged the last of her luggage. It was a bothersome task, but there wasn't much she could really do-the week had exhausted her desire for clubbing or even going out for a drink. The manual labor, however, with its mechanical movements, provided her with an occupation and kept her mind from wondering.

Boxes became unpacked, clothes were put away, personal items were arranged on display or hidden into the drawers where nobody would look. Small things became adjusted, books were re-arranged, wrapping-paper piled in small mountains at her feet. When Soi decided to call it quits, there was a thick carpet of litter at her feet, but she was content.

Just as she was wondering about what to have for dinner, the phone rang. It took her at least three minutes to dig it out, and another minute to figure out who had called her. Groaning, she dialed Unohana-sensei's number, and batted her brain for any excuse to get out of some engagement she had forgotten with her.

"Good evening, Soi Fong-san." Her colleague didn't sound irritated. That was good. Then again, Soi hadn't really seen Unohana show any negative emotion in public. The woman was like a Disney princess-she couldn't be anything than mildly upset, at best. Then, she went on without waiting a question "I just wanted to remind you about the parents-teachers conference tonight. I haven't seen you here and we start in an hour."

"Oh…yeah…" Soi cursed herself. Why hadn't she remembered this? Yamamoto had probably been telling them about it all week.

Ah, yeah, substitute teacher plus extra classes plus clubbing…not the best combo.

"Preparations are exhausting, aren't they." Lord, she could practically hear her smile that smile of hers…it wasn't a bad grimace, but it always made her feel like a first-year.

"Yes, they are. Thank you for reminding me, I seem to have lost track of time. I'll be right there." Soi said as calmly as possible, hung up, looked around the room, took a deep breath and…panicked.

However, she had enough reasoning to panic while changing outfits, and calculating. Fifteen minutes to school on bus, ten if she ran fast. Ten to twenty to fix a few notes on each individual student, ten to put herself together and make herself presentable…She had fifteen minutes at best to hesitate.

Soi locked the apartment and threw herself in a mad dash through the spring twilight.

* * *


	4. Enter Aizen Sosuke

* * *

Walking through the door, Soi breathed a sigh of relief. The parents hadn't arrived yet, giving her time to arrange the tables, get rid of some stray pieces of paper, and scribble down some notes on her students' behavior. Consulting with the clock, she decided she had enough time to go to the bathroom and make herself presentable.

When she returned, she was pleased to find that the room was slowly filling. To her surprise, her students weren't all from rich and well-off families. A handsome young man came over to her as soon as he saw her, shook hands and presented himself as Inoue Sora, the older brother and guardian of Orihime-the girl who always spaced off during class.

"I'm so happy to finally meet you." He said, all sincerity and sweet smiles "Orihime talks about you all the time."

"Is that so?" Soi asked, pleased.

"Of course. Sensei this, sensei that…she really looks up to you." He confirmed "I hope you'll stay, Soi Fong-san. There aren't many people who understand her in this school."

"Well, I'm not going anywhere." She nodded, before busying herself with her notes.

Just as they were about to start, the door burst open and a tall man with spiky black hair and an unshaven face flew in, booming "Good evening everyone!!!" and made a move to hug her. Soi, baffled, did the first thing she thought right.

She slapped him across the face, sending him spiraling down on the floor.

It wasn't after Inoue Sora came to help that she realized she had just hit one of her students' parents. Great. Just great. Wasn't this a perfect start for the evening. Bracing herself, she kneeled down to help the man and apologize; but then he leaped up, grinning wider than ever, laughing and proclaiming loudly that he hadn't seen anyone as feisty as her before, and she let her shock leek through her façade and on her face.

"Kurosaki Isshin." The man laughed as he shook hands with her "You're teaching my ungrateful son Ichigo, I believe."

It took everything she had not to let her jaw drop. That clown was Kurosaki Ichigo's father? She knew very well that boy-he constantly got picked on by the school bullies thanks to his bright orange hair. It didn't strike her immediately-having grown in a country where immigrants were nearly as many as natives, Soi had long ago stopped marveling at people's strange hairstyles and coloring. However, here, bleached hair was considered the mark of a bully, and Ichigo constantly got involved into fights.

Contrary to everything, though, he was a serious and self-centered student. His grades were in the top fifty of the school, he was good in sports, and handsome to boot. Even though he fought, he didn't send anyone in the ER, and he was polite enough to make any mother proud. Soi expected his father to be a quiet, severe man, especially after she learnt he was a doctor. But to her everlasting surprise, the man was as easy going as the sky was blue.

* * *

"Well, as you know, I am Soi Fong, and I will teach your children English for this school year. I hope that we will work well together." She began, then eyed the parents in front of her. Everyone was leaning in, as if waiting for her to make some huge and dramatic speech that would change their lives forever.

Damn it. She had never been the one to debate, she was a woman of a few words. Strict, serious and little. Oh, well….

"I have not been a teacher for a long time." She said "But in my practice so far, I have discovered two simple rules. One, one must be strict in order to work efficiently with students, and second, dialogue is vital. As you know well, this year is very important, with your kids going to university, and I will do my best to help them. I believe that we should establish some sort of consultancy between you, your children and the teachers, so that you have a good idea of how to go about it."

A tiny woman with brown hair brought her hand up. "Excuse me, Soi Fong-san, but…would you care to explain why are you giving everyone so much homework? Lately, my children aren't going out at all. Even the ones you taught this week. They said they were buried in homework yesterday, and I'm sure their teacher would never check how they've done."

"You must be…Aizen Momo-san, aren't you?" Soi guessed, ignoring the high-and-mighty way the woman had addressed her. "I want to congratulate you, your children are most impeccable when it comes to their duties. I had the opportunity to work with your daughters Loli and Menoly this week, and I have to say that they are extremely bright."

"As for the amount of homework…" she sighed as she leaned back against the desk "I suppose everybody wants the very best for their families, and with your children's capabilities I'm sure that they can aim for the most prestigious universities. However, the ways of teaching there and here have nothing in common, especially abroad. What I'm aiming for is to create habits that would come in handy when your children move on and help them feel more comfortable with their future professors."

"Yes, but don't you think you're getting too far?" Aizen Momo continued "My girls still have a good three years before they go to university, and as for Luppi and Sun-sun, they don't aspire to go to…Cambridge or Oxford to continue their studies."

"The choice is up to them, and your capabilities. I've not had the pleasure to work with them for a long time, but I can see that everyone in this class can take on the pressure. I'm sure that the homework they receive isn't more than they could handle, Aizen-san." Soi flashed her a smile, although her eyes remained cold.

However, Sun-sun's mother didn't notice and only huffed disapprovingly. Then, to her surprise, Kurosaki Isshin called. "Well, I'm glad my stupid son has more things to do at home. That way I'm sure he's not out there impregnating girls like a brainless ape."

Soi sweat-dropped. Really, of all the things to say…Not that he didn't make a good point, but Ichigo wasn't exactly the type to impregnate girls for a sport.

"Yes. It is quite refreshing, seeing them work so hard." Another woman added "So far, their English teachers never gave them anything fit to their abilities. My son used to complain that his homework was an insult for someone who understood English as well as he did. Now he's absolutely content."

"Indeed." Inoue Sora nodded "Orihime's more focused as well."

An appreciative murmur went through the parents, before more centralized questions got posed and Soi was asked to give report of her class's status in other subjects. Then, each parent asked for some information on his child's doings in school. In the end, they all seemed very pleased, with the exception of Aizen Momo who frowned through her entire speech.

* * *

Honestly, Soi Fong couldn't understand the woman. She'd had parents sobbing with relief when they heard that their kids fared well at school, and even though Luppi spaced off often enough, Sun-sun was extremely bright and extremely focused. What mother wouldn't like to hear such praise of her children?

It wasn't until parents from other classes started coming to enquire after their own progenies that she realized how things are. Particularly when she met the father.

The first thing she noticed about him was his voice. It wasn't like he'd said anything particular, just asked if she was Soi Fon sensei. However, the sound of him was enough to freeze her dead. It was low, melodic, almost hypnotic. It caught people's attention immediately, it was clear its owner didn't have to raise it very often.

But the real shock came when she looked up. Aizen Sosuke was a contradiction of traits. Brown hair in disarray as if he was a sleepy student, but an angular face with a firm jaw; an easy posture, dressed in a sharp suit; he was smiling welcomingly, but the dark eyes behind the frames of his glasses were absolutely soulless.

"Yes, I am Soi Fong sensei."

"Pleased to meet you. Aizen Sosuke, father of Luppi and Sun-sun. I believe you've met my wife earlier today, but I wanted to make your acquaintance. My children always bring such good reports of you."

"Thank you." She said, slightly disbelieving.

"Indeed, they are quite pleased with you." He went on, as if trying to convince her "Even Apache says that your teaching rocks, and she hardly has anything nice to say about anybody."

"I'm glad to be of help. I already told your wife how Sun-sun and Lupi are faring, and Tesla and Apache are also very focused in class. I don't think you have anything to worry about, Aizen-san, your children's grades are stable and they work very hard for my classes."

"Yes, they do. I haven't seen Luppi show any remote interest in anything but mathematics lately, but your subject seems to grow on him with each passing day. Actually…"

As she watched the man talk Soi unwillingly thought about the first time she'd seen a peacock. Her class had gone on a field trip to the nearby petting zoo, where her friends got a kick out of feeling the birds and goats and rabbits. The birds had been vibrant, all color and flash, and yet she'd gotten the feeling that the thing was made out of paper and glass, not flesh. As if it was utterly lifeless. It had given her a haughty, cold look, to which she had responded by muttering: "I wonder if you taste like chicken."

Really, that peacock was probably no different than a chicken if skinned. And Aizen Sosuke…he waxed eloquent about his children's praise of her, and the great role she played. She knew she hadn't taught them long enough to make an impact on their lives, and she really didn't understand where all this flattery was going.

"Thank you." She nodded "My only desire is to be of use."

"That you are. I understood from the other parents that you're hoping to establish consultancies between students and parents, for the sake of helping in the continuation of their studies." Soi made an affirmative gesture, and he went on "I cannot being to express how happy am I to hear of this. Their previous head mistress had no such aspirations, if I may say so, she was wholly disinterested when it came to the future of her students. But…I was hoping that we could work on a deeper level on that."

"A deeper level?" Soi asked, instinctively tensing when he reached out to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Yes. Luppi got so far because of Sun-sun's success, and I'm sure that we can continue in the same way. As it is, I believe my daughter has some aspirations to become a doctor, and I will be grateful if you encourage her to focus her attention in the subjects related to this profession, namely biology and chemistry."

"Sun-sun-san is focused in all her classes. She will fare well with whatever subject she picks up."

"Yes, but…as you know, the styles of teaching are different everywhere." He said "And I want my children to be the best."

"That is only natural."

"Indeed. That is why…I want Sun-sun to focus on becoming a doctor. I want her to set herself a clear path and follow it without deferring. I want you to encourage her and make sure she knows what will happen if she does not make it. Now, I understand that there are…other subjects to study for, but I'm sure you can have a chat with your colleagues and help them understand the situation."

"And, pray, what will happen if she doesn't make it?" Soi asked casually, keeping her expression questioningly innocent, and her voice even.

"She will sink. And I do not wish to have a fallen daughter." The smile faltered for a brief second before flashing out again, and she hurried to re-assure him that she will do everything in her power to help…but the meeting couldn't end fast enough. She wanted out of the school and away from the parents, at least for a few hours. Smiles and nods couldn't deceive her-she had seen the monster inside.

* * *

Sun-sun had had to attend a few things in school, thus she had to come home with her parents. She wasn't sure she wanted to know how their meeting with her sensei had done, but after she heard their comments, she realized she had actually hoped to find some approval.

Momo, of course, had been indignant-how dare this young woman speak to her like this, how did she get her permission to teach and why couldn't she have remained in the US, keeping the strange customs to herself. Sun-sun hadn't paid too much attention to that-her stepmother wasn't exactly what you'd call bright, and Soi Fong sensei was too smart to be swayed by appearances.

Her father, mercifully, was pleased with her. He said that she was a reasonable person who knew their place, and that he was sure she meant well. Momo had agreed immediately, thus putting an end to the conversation…but Sun-sun still felt a little put off.

The reason why was simple-whenever her father approved of somebody, he turned out to be just like him-controlling, constricted and ignorant, and her sensei was much, much more than that. She taught in a way that made people listen. She made people like her subject, and she offered those who cared to learn more than they had ever imagined.

It wasn't like Sun-sun hated school. She just couldn't like it. She studied and excelled in all her subjects, carrying her stray brother all the way, but she had never gone about it with some sort of enjoyment. Her previous head-mistress was a detached woman, who wouldn't blend in with the woodwork only when she was teaching grammar. Soi Fong sensei was different. Sun-sun discovered she actually enjoyed her classes, that she looked forward to them. Somehow, she had expected a different reaction from her parents. Had she hoped for too much?

* * *

Soi thanked Unohana again and again for her call. Her fellow teachers asked her how her first conference had gone, whether the parents had been pleased, and if somebody had put her off. She knew better than to tell them what she thought of Aizen Sosuke, but it seemed that Kurosaki Isshin was a pain in the neck whenever he went. Even Kuchiki Byakuya said he 'sympathized' with her, because of the man's wild behavior, which spoke volumes. Then, as she was making herself a coffee, a lean, tall man stopped by her side and clamed her attention.

Looking up, Soi Fong saw a pale face with angular features, framed by dark hair and a perfectly oval face. The strange green of his eyes was striking against his colorless lips and cheeks.

"I am Uliquorra. The school's doctor." He presented himself with a small bow. "I am sorry I did not present myself until this moment, Soi Fong-san. I hope that you find the ambience here…conductive to education."

"I do. Thank you." Actually, this fussing over her was getting more and more irritating, but she guessed that teachers were hard to find nowadays.

"You met your class's parents tonight." He said as he reached to pour himself a cup of tea

"Yes. The…" he nodded, noticing the hesitation, urging her to continue. Soi swallowed hard, feeling just a little bit intimidated. She'd let it slip and now he was staring as if he could extract the information simply from her silence. Her brain started working double overtime, noting, analyzing-he was neat and white and sterile, absolutely motionless, as if from another world…And then there was she, practically melting under his gaze "The…Aizen family seems to have become a part of this school."

"Indeed, they have." Uliquorra sensei acknowledged, quirking the corners of his mouth upwards. "What do you think of them?"

"They are…" Soi blinked, trying to find the correct word "…a very curious family."

To her surprise, Uliquorra-sensei let out a small laugh, as if pleased by something. "That is one way of putting it."

Soi Fong nodded, drank her coffee in large gulps and prepared to leave, when she heard the doctor call.

"If you're not otherwise engaged…" he began "Would you like to come with me to dinner?"

She hesitated. Everyone else was leaving, Byakuya and Retsu were probably not in the mood to go out, and Uliquorra seemed like the type that wouldn't pester her about petty things.

She nodded in agreement.

* * *

A/N-Flel to a car is like reviews for a...how does the sentance end? Take your pick!


	5. A friend and a foil

The two settled in the darker corner of a sushi restaurant-not because anyone of the felt uneasy, but rather because both preferred the comforting shadows to the bright lights.

Uliquorra had asked a couple of questions about her stay, if she liked it, if her class was giving her any trouble. So far it was just the same enquiry everyone else put her through, with the only difference that the doctor didn't seem to care much. He was obviously trying to make a overture to something, which interested Soi Fong and kept her on her toes.

It wasn't until they got their drinks that he began:

"So…did the elders like you, or you did not pass the test?"

"Are you talking about the parents?" she asked, as she rubbed her stiff neck "They seemed pleased with what I said, with the exception of Aizen Momo-san." She threw him a look "I don't recall seeing you around the school. Why come to the parents-teachers' conference?"

"Like I said, I didn't present myself to you earlier and I wanted to remedy that. Besides…" he stared at her "I wanted to see who made such a stir with the students. You are a very interesting person, Soi Fong-san. There aren't many teachers who would go as far as to follow their students to some lowly bars to make sure they do their homework. Aaah…" he saw her tense up "…So you thought nobody knew. For someone as indiscreet as you, you sure have a high sense of superiority."

"I don't see how my ways of teaching concern you, Uliquorra-sensei, but I wasn't following those students because of some misplaced protectiveness of them. Any problems they might have might affect me, and I cannot allow this to happen."

"Ah, yes…I suppose you noticed how some parents looked at you today." He began "As if they evaluated you."

"Yes."

"Well, they were. This conference couldn't come fast enough for some of them. See, each and every one of those parents reads about scandals in schools. Shootings. Terrorists. Affairs. They know 'Notes on a scandal' by heart-their biggest fear is that their precious children might fall into this trap. Well, safe for Isshin-san, but his biggest fear is that is son turns out to be gay."

"I highly doubt that." Soi rolled her eyes "But I think they liked what they saw."

"Because you showed them the image they wanted to see. They met a stern, serious teacher who thinks children can't decide for themselves. You should be glad they don't know about the reason why you left your previous occupation."

"I see you've read my file."

"Read your file? I practically made it." She gave him a questioning look "Don't be so surprised. Yamamoto also saw the movie. When he received your application, my vacation was cut short so that I could verify its euthenics and make sure there is nothing wrong with you."

"You get an awful lot of work for a doctor. Especially when he could've searched the things he needed from his computer."

"Ah, but computer files can be forged. Unlike the testimony of people. I asked around, talked to your colleagues and went to see the girl you supposedly molested. From the beginning I could see that she was lying, and your fellow teachers spoke in very high terms of you, even though they aren't your friends. I concluded that the whole scandal was nothing more than the caprice of a spoiled brat that turned into a mass hysteria, but now that I've met you…I'm beginning to think that I've overlooked one factor."

"Myself?"

"Yes. Yourself. You, Soi Fong-san, are a very, very peculiar person. One gets the impression that you are the typical straight-laced teacher that agrees with everything parents say and thinks nothing of her class. But you have a very fiery temper, something even I could notice, even though with a great delay."

"And what is it that you want?" she asked, after a small silence "I suppose you're not telling me all this because your jaw muscles need a workout." If he was going to expose her to people's scrutiny, she couldn't do anything about it. Maybe, if he tried to blackmail her, she could do as he wished, if his terms were reasonable.

"To be your friend." Uliquorra answered, calm and collected as always.

They sat in silence, observing the chefs work. On his part, he looked disinterested enough. On hers, she was in complete shock. The man sitting next to her was calm, collected, trustworthy…and he scared her speechless. Why?

"You seem hesitant. Would you like some time to think about it?"

"It is strange that you would think of friendship as of something you need to think about." She said "I was just surprised."

"I'm not trying to blackmail you, Soi Fong. I am just apprehensive of those whom I call my friends."

"And I fit your requirements?"

"You ask questions. And you know what the Aizen family is. Of course you fit my requirements."

"I never said what I think of that family, just that they are curious."

"You hesitated. That shows you're not the stereotypical butt-kisser and that you see through people. Aizen Sosuke is a controlling bastard who's greatest fear is to see his precious family turn against him. You know it. If you didn't, I wouldn't be here talking to you."

"Some point." She sighed "I don't mind being friends with anyone, Uliquorra-sensei, but I hope that the term doesn't include…other benefits."

Was it her, or his grim expression got just a tad darker? "Whatever extras come from this friendship, I am sure they're more entitled to you than to me, Soi Fong-sensei."

"Just making sure. I've had weirder boyfriends." She shrugged "But you don't seem to like the Aizen family very much."

"Yes. The parents are just the kind of thick-headed idiots who raise sociopaths and criminals and then blame it on everybody else. There hasn't been a shooting in this school yet, but if it happens, I'll bet my money that it is that boy Tesla." Uliquorra hissed. "That is probably the type of people I hate most."

"The kids are bright."

"But constantly under pressure. Sooner or later, they'll snap, and then things will get ugly. He wanted you to do something, didn't he?" Soi didn't need to ask who he was

"Yes. He wants me to make sure his daughter graduates med school in three years tops."

"Are you going to do it?"

"It is none of my business." She said "Sun-sun is extremely bright. She will excel in everything. Aizen Sosuke's only concern is that she has a prestigious job. She has showed no signs that she intends to do otherwise. This can go without my interference and he can't force me to do otherwise. It is as simple as that."

"He's on the school board. He can fire you. Or better yet-dig into your past."

"Doesn't he need a majority of votes to fire me? You know, democracy, voting, that kind of thing?"

"Yes, we have that. But if you haven't forgotten, post-war America discovered another thing-public opinion. And if the parents learn the real reason why you came to the rescue, which they surely will if you piss Aizen off, they will make sure that you are fired and sent back in disgrace. At best."

"You sure care a lot about my well-being."

"My life here, Soi Fong-sensei, is very boring. I just crave company."

"So why not seek it?"

For the first time in the entire evening, Uliquorra really looked at her. And thank god he didn't do that more often, Soi thought, because his eyes drilled right through the face and into the mind. She'd never liked the color of her eyes-too dull, too doll-ish. Uliquorra's were deep, piercing, expressive…powerful.

Little did she know that someone else had already thought so…and had told him.

"I am." He finally pointed out "But this isn't about me. I'm just warning you. Things in this school get dangerous exclusively and only thanks to the Aizen family. You have to be careful around them, because things…are about to get dangerous."

Soi Fong smiled, as she picked up a piece and ate it. "Ok, let's say I believe you and they piss you off solely because the parents are stupid…"

"Are you suggesting that I may have a different motive?"

"…How do you know so much about them? They seem to keep you interested."

Uliquorra eyed her.

"If it makes you feel more at easy…" she went on "…let's talk hypothetically. Let's say that perhaps someone has a grudge against Aizen Sosuke and that's why has a heightened interest in his family. By observing them, he comes to a conclusion that they are dangerous. Why? And how?"

"Be glad that we talk hypothetically, woman, because otherwise, I would've been offended. Aizen Sosuke is too lowly a man to be an object of resentment of anyone. At least…of anyone with common sense. As for your questions, it becomes apparent to someone with basic knowledge in psychology and enough of an observance. You know that sophomore, Apache? You don't need to be a genius to figure her out-just watch a few movies. She's the stereotypical angry teenager, and you can bet that she picked out that image from the same place people recognize her behavior from."

"Yeah, I've had a couple of them. Still, she's not so bad."

"They're never really bad, but they have the potential to become. She's easiest to figure out because her behavior matches her profile perfectly-parents divorce, father brings kindergarten teacher home as the new mommy, already pregnant with two more little sisters….Aizen Sosuke doesn't waste time. Apache merely reacts violently against the image Momo tries to preserve-the picture perfect family."

"Having already met her, it's not that hard to imagine it. The only thing that makes an impression when you meet her is that she wants people to make a difference between her children and the ones from the first marriage."

"And thank God Sosuke sends her to the conferences with the teachers of the older ones, otherwise she would've been shocked to learn what little idiots she bore." Uliquorra said, mercilessly "Thank God you decided to help them. There was talk of the police combing the clubs tonight, for any minors who got out of home."

"As I said, it was purely…unintentional." She said calmly, resuming her meal.

* * *

That night, Soi had a dream. It was one of those surreal reveries that left you helpless and confused, and never really satisfied. There was…ice, and glass, and…strangely enough, bells. Somebody was with her there, but she couldn't see their face-she only had their soft caresses. Small hands, definitely female's. Silky skin and hair. Cold kisses.

When she woke up, she had absolutely no reminiscence of the dream whatsoever…only the impressions of it. A person, cold and soft and absolutely defenseless. She didn't know what this was, and yet she felt that person so close…as if she had known them all her life. She didn't know why, but at the thought of it, something in her broke. Hugging her body tight, Soi let a few frustrated tears slip, before her body went back into its previous state of cold morbidity.

* * *

Soi stared at her students, trying hard to conceal her desperation.

"I don't know what to tell you." She finally said, putting the examination sheets in front of her and sorting them into neat stacks. "I thought that you guys liked Shakespeare. I made you write this essay because I wanted to see how many of you read "Midsummer Night's Dream", and it turns out that you can't even spell 'donkey' correctly? And by the way, Keigo-kun, the correct term here is an ass, but still I don't see why you thought it was written….d-o-n-c-i."

Distributing the sheets amongst the students, her mind divided. On one part, she had never thought that her class would need spelling lessons. On the other hand, they learned English through movies and CD's, and she knew well enough that singers weren't the potential winners of a spelling bee. It was normal that they would have difficulties, but…

Well, it seemed that they would have to lay literature off for a while.

"Now, everyone here has some problem or another with this, so here's what we're going to do." She said, leaning back on the desk "The ones with the most spelling mistakes, I've noted their number on the bottom of the page, will stay after class, doing dictations with me, until they show signs of improvement. The others, I want you to check your essay carefully, take all the words with mistakes and write them one hundred times until you can spell them in your sleep. Understood?"

"But sensei…." Luppi called "That would take ages!"

"Then you better get started. I don't know about you, but there is a serious problem in a class where only three people know how to write correctly in English. And don't smile like this, Keigo-kun, stupid mistakes like this can get you into trouble later on."

"Such as?"

"Such as now. The ones with more than ten spelling mistakes will be copying dictionaries until their hands fall off, for starters." They knew better than to speak back. She was out for blood today.

* * *

Later on, when the classes were over and the grounded ones began their punishment, Soi remembered another matter of business that had to be attended.

"Kurosaki-kun?" The tall, orange-haired your man froze in mid-pace as he was about to exit the room. Turning around slightly, his eyes met hers guiltily.

"Yeah?"

"Can I have a word with you?" she asked, rummaging her desk for the papers she needed. He sat stiffly on a chair in front of her, much to the amusement of his classmates. Soi hummed something to herself as she found the thing she needed. "Ah, there it is. Kurosaki, what's this?"

"That's a…request for transfer, sensei."

"Good, good. Now…" she leaned closer "…I'm not the person to judge you, but can you at least tell me why you wish to change classes, Kurosaki?"

The young man stared at his shoes and mumbled something incoherent.

"Listen here…" she sighed, leaning in "It's not out of some personal caprice that I'm asking you this. The class you wish to be transferred to is one of those for the family of tutors here. Without sufficient reason for this, I can't approve of the transfer, or put it before principle Yamamoto."

Still no answer. Great, that boy was as thick-headed as an ass. Which was a shame, really, he was smart and serious. Actually, if it wasn't for that scowl on his face, he was pretty handsome. Well, she just had to guess.

"There are bullies everywhere." She tried "You won't get away from them if you move."

"It's not…the bullies. I'm fine with them, really."

"But they pick on you."

"Sensei, it's not the bullies!"

"Fine." Soi forced a smile, sitting back "So what is it? You feel like you can't work with me, is that it?"

"No, sensei. You rock."

She rolled her eyes at the crudeness of the comment. "Then? Look, here, you've been with these guys since middle school, and more. Your friends are here. I don't know if there's someone you like…"

"Hell no!"

"But I must know some good reason for you to change classes, otherwise I can't help you. Come on, Kurosaki, I'm trying to work something out with you!"

"Look, sensei, I understand you, but…it's personal."

"What personal reason can drag you away from your friends?"

"Sensei, it's because they're my friends…look, I want to learn how to deal with life without them."

Soi eyed him dangerously. Then, sighing, she got up and walked around the desk. Obviously, it would take wild horses to get him to talk, and she had enough time to work. Giving the other students a silent warning to watch their own business, she leaned back and pursed her lips. How to go about it? Keep guessing? It sounded like a good idea, but if it was that personal, he probably wouldn't trust her with it, even if he was bored to hell.

Just as she was about to bark some threat, there was a knock on the door and Kuchiki Byakuya and all his cold demeanor entered the room. For a split second, his eyes locked with Ichigo's, and the temperature dropped slightly. Soi looked at them with surprise, but didn't say anything.

"Soi Fong-sensei…" Byakuya said, looking away from her student and advancing towards her "Can I have a moment of your time?"

"Very well…." She sighed. Great, no cross-examining people today. "You can go, Kurosaki. We will discuss your…predicament when you are better prepared."

"Did I interrupt something?" The Japanese literature teacher asked as the orange-head left the room. "I did not think your students needed detention."

"It's just a spelling lesson. Apparently, somebody doesn't know how to write "donkey"."

"Kurosaki too?" perfect black eyebrows winged upward. She was lucky she was in his 'friend' circle, Soi thought. To strangers, Kuchiki Byakuya was like a Grecian God-perfect, cold, unattainable. To friends he was just a sad heir who filled his time doing a relatively humble profession.

So why did the almighty Kuchiki Byakuya care for an unknown student?

"No. I had to discuss with him a certain request he made."

"Why?"

"I needed clarification as to the reasons that made him pose it. It's nothing serious." Shoving the folder into her desk, she turned to her colleague with her customary half-smile "So what is it that you wanted to talk to me about? I suspect that it wasn't Kurosaki."

"No, indeed." He nodded "As you know, as the head of the Kuchiki family, I am engrossed with various affairs and trifles of the clan. A certain…dispute between two branches in Kyoto has arisen and the matter is of such delicate nature that I must attend to it myself. As it is, I will be absent for a week, and I wanted to ask you to take on the fencing practice of the school's team for me while I am gone."

Soi blinked. Well…that was unexpected. "You believe that a week of no practice would harm them?"

"I believe that a week of practicing with you would be most beneficial. Soi Fong sensei, I have coached some of those students since they were in middle school. Now, they are seniors and they have great aspirations for this season. Practice is essential, and I understand that you have participated in several tournaments. The experience would be priceless, and it would not take too much of your time."

"It is the second extracurricular activity, no?"

"Yes. And since I asked Yamamoto-sensei's permission, the training sessions are held every day. I trust that it would not be too much of a trouble for you to take care of them this one week."

"Well…it has been a while, but…of course. I would be honored to help them out."

"I am most grateful to you." He nodded, before excusing himself with a small bow.

* * *

Soi consulted with her watch when she let her poor students go. Spelling had improved slightly, but she was still having torture sessions with Keigo. She still had enough time to go down to Uliquorra's office. For two nights in a row, she'd been having strange dreams, and they weren't giving her rest. She was rather hoping that her _friend_ would give her a more efficient remedy than warm milk and old movies to help her sleep.

She didn't bother knocking and walked into the doctor's office. To her surprise, it was already occupied by Sun-sun and Uliqourra, who were fussing around Inoue Orihime, the former sobbing hysterically into a handkerchief. Since Soi had already taken to seeing the girl smile no matter what, the sight of her tears was quite mortifying.

"Inoue…what happened to her?" she asked, rushing by the girl's side.

"Cooking class. They were cutting onions up. Do the math." Uliquorra replied, apparently the only one unimpressed by the situation. Even Sun-sun seemed compassionate, for some reason.

"I see." Soi nodded, walked towards Orihime and looked at the cut on her finger "It's not too deep, Inoue. You shouldn't cry so much over such petty things."

"Yes…" she sniffed

"It's nothing I can't handle." Uliquorra pointed out flatly "Sun-sun, you should go prepare for your fencing practice. Soi Fong-sensei, please state your business because I am in no mood to entertain anyone today."

So that's why he picked his friends carefully, she thought. The guy could piss oneself off sometimes.

"It is nothing of consequence. I am late anyway. Sun-sun-san, you are on the fencing team?"

"Yes, sensei." She replied quietly

"Then will you walk me to the gym? Kuchiki-sensei asked me to cover for him while he's in Kyoto."

She blinked. "Very well." Giving Orihime one last pat on the back, Sun-sun took off the white coat she wore and followed Soi Fong out of the doctor's office.

* * *

There was silence as the two women found their way through the school, and they kept quiet while they changed clothes. Soi was surprised that the school could actually afford a full uniform for the team even at practice. For herself, she only had a T-shirt and shorts, but she was probably going to amend for that.

The team had somehow learned that they would have a substitute, and were waiting quietly for her. Soi Fong greeted them, told them why she was there, and expressed her hope that they would work well together. Everyone nodded and the practice began.

It felt as if she was in a bubble, she thought, a bubble of silence. Whenever she went, she enveloped people in them and they became as listless and quiet as she was. Strange…suddenly, everything around her seemed to drift…Soi let out a small sigh as she tried to focus on the students warming up. Their technique was probably superb, as expected of Kuchiki Byakuya, but were they prepared for any sneak attacks that their opponents might produce?

"Well…" she began, once everyone was prepared "I'm not acquainted with Kuchiki-san's style, but I've worked with different masters before and I think I can pick up from where you left off. Can I ask someone for a demonstration? Sun-sun-san?"

The girl nodded quietly, put on her helmet and walked towards the pathway with her. "En garde." She said, before launching off into an attack.

How different she was when she fought, Soi noticed while her body switched automatically in defense. Her back straightened, her head held itself high, and her entire body moved gracefully like water over rocks. However, there was nothing passive in the sharp, brisk movements of her foil. Kuchiki had taught them well, but they really had nothing but a distinct pattern in their heads.

Testing her reaction to sudden changes, Soi twisted her foil and launched into a counter-attack. The girl's eyes widened with surprise as she tried to keep up with her. She was good, but…for how long could she keep up? She briskly quickened the pace, moved forward, made her step back. At one point, the foil flew right out of her hand and the tip of Soi's weapon touched her shoulder.

"Touché." Sun-sun nodded, a slight twinkle passing her lips as she took her helmet off. "Thank you for the lesson, sensei."

"Thank you for the fight, Sun-sun." Soi smiled in return, before turning towards the team "Alright, everyone, split into pairs and let me see how you fence."

The rest of the practice went normally. She fussed between pairs, corrected minor problems in posture, tried to take them out of the frame. If anything, they learned fast. But, from the way they fought, it became painfully clear who came on their own will and who did this for his parents' sakes. And, unfortunately, the former represented the majority in the team.

And an attitude like this won't win them anything, Soi Fong thought sadly as she walked between the rows. Which was a real shame, the ones who came for fun really wanted to make something out of it-they wouldn't stand a chance against the tidal waves of indifference. Back where she came from, things were different. Her parents had been strict, but they never insisted on her having a brilliant career in sports or anything-as long as her grades remained on top of the list, she had no problem. There were exceptions, of course, but generally people picked the extracurricular activity they liked best.

The worst part was that she couldn't help those kids either. One week wasn't enough to get them passionate about fencing, and even if she tried, Kuchiki had to work with her on that. Soi wasn't sure to what extent her straight-laced colleague would agree to her methods of teaching, but the chances weren't pretty high.

Still…what good would come from all that hard work if she didn't influence them. Nodding to herself, Soi walked up to the centre of the room and yelled:

"Stop."

All activity ceased immediately and the team turned towards their substitute teacher curiously.

"How many of you come here by their own free will?" she asked, playing with her foil "And please answer honestly."

There was a quiet murmur, the people looking at their partners confusedly. It wasn't a surprise that only Sun-sun said anything coherent: "At some extent."

"Fine. And how many of you find enjoyment, any enjoyment in this sport."

Some people raised their hands timidly. Well, that was good, the better half of the team liked what they do. But that wasn't enough…

"How many of you want to win the championship?" she asked brushing a few strands of hair from her eyes. Enthusiastic nods, but the realization that she was onto something was quickly dawning on them. They were weary.

"Fine then, but you'll have to do better than that." She stated "You work hard, every day, but you need to add up more imagination to your style. I'll be sure to bring you some videos tomorrow, but for now, let's try to work on your speed. Pick it up, and let's see how fast you can go."

* * *

A/N-Alright, a bigger chappie for you to sink your teeth in. It might take me a while before I upload the next one, so be patient. Have something in mind, though-if you don't review, it might take a lot longer.


	6. Clarification

Oops...this turned M. I'm afraid there's no way around it.

* * *

Summer drew in, and with that a whole new set of problems for Soi Fong. The reason for Kurosaki's sudden change of heart still remained hidden from her, and as much as she tried to get it from him, her arguments never seemed to touch him. He just said 'personal reasons', and she couldn't do anything about it. Of course, she could just push the request through, but what was the point if she couldn't defend him in case somebody objected to his transfer? She could ask around, of course, figure out the reason herself…but it seemed so lowly, to act like a common gossiper she immediately rejected the idea.

However, with June closer and closer, she had little other choice, when a visit pushed her mind in the needed direction.

After class, she was gathering her things, preparing to go to practice. Her week as coach of the fencing team had long ended, but Kuchiki-sensei, seeing her progress with his students, offered her a permanent position as co-coach. Being a busy man, he said, he would feel much calmer if there was somebody as competent as her in charge of the team while he was gone doing errands for his family. Soi didn't know why she accepted-perhaps it was the prospect of teaching such bright kids, perhaps the chance to fence with a master such as Kuchiki Byakuya, perhaps it was the way she exhausted all the extra energy through the sport. Either way, it was beneficial for all-the children learned from both and often saw them fence together.

* * *

As Soi was putting away some papers to check, somebody stopped by her desk, obviously waiting to be paid attention to. Looking up, the young woman was surprised to see Inoue Orihime, the girl who constantly spoke of alien invasions and leapt, screaming, in the middle of class because she saw a bee. Although bright, Soi often found it hard working with such a…unique person. Actually, she thought, she had chastised her for drawing on her notebook again today. Was it because of this?

"How can I help you, Inoue?" she asked

"I…er…wanted to apologize for today, sensei." The girl began, toying with the handle of her schoolbag.

"It's alright. I understand everybody needs a field to express themselves in. Just…try to keep yours into Nnoitra-sensei's classes."

"He is funny." She noted. Soi herself would've never categorized the lean man as 'funny', but there were a few adjectives close to that word that came on her mind.

She was about to nod and dismiss her, when she noticed that there was something else wrong with Orihime. She was swinging back and fro on her heels and she was chewing on her bottom lip-a sure sign that she had something on her mind. Praying that it wasn't about onions and aliens again, Soi sat back on her chair and asked: "Is there something else you'd like to tell me?"

"Well…" the girl began hesitantly.

"Inoue, I know something is wrong because you've been spacing out more than usual today. So spill-what is it?"

"Sensei, do you think I'm pretty?" she babbled on.

Soi blinked confusedly

"Come again?"

"Do you think I'm pretty?" she asked, slightly mortified. Soi looked at the girl, opening and closing her mouth silently a few times. She was no judge of beauty, especially female's, but…Inoue Orihime was by all means a charming child. Exotic, by Japanese standards, but she had a generous and kind heart, and a figure to match it.

"Yes." She finally answered

"You're not lying, are you, sensei?" she pleaded. What was with her?

"I have no reason to lie to you. But…why would you ask such a question. It takes one look in the mirror for you to see that you're pretty. Don't boys compliment you every day?" she knew for a fact that they had to dig her out of Valentine's day cards every year

"Well…when I was in middle school, some kids from the other school called me a freak and cut my hair off…and now…well…I've never considered myself…very pretty, but…lately, I've been thinking that maybe I'm not even good to look at."

"What is this nonsense?" Soi shook her head "I can't say for boys, but you have many good sides, and people appreciate them."

"I know, but…"

"Look, Orihime, girls your age…younger ones too, often feel insecure about their looks, and they often get in their heads the idea that they need to change. I can tell you that you don't need to change. I've had friends that would kill for a figure like yours, and I can see that you have at least half a dozen admirers in this school. There is no reason to feel insecure."

"But, sensei…" the girl sighed "The one I like…he doesn't notice me."

Kami, how did I end up as the school's love councilor, Soi thought with disgust. Unshared love was probably the worst kind, because you could never explain to a lovesick child that there was nothing she could do about it. There were enough guys that would love to be Inoue Orihime's boyfriend, and quite a few of them would've treated her with the respect she deserves. However, by Murphy's law, she had probably fallen for some jackass who probably wasn't interested in girls. She looked like a girl who would fall into such a misfortune.

"Let me tell you something, out of my personal experience…" ok, maybe the personal experience of a friend, but the principle counted "…when it comes to relationships, men either like you, or they don't. There is no third condition. If a guy likes you, then you should go on a few dates, keep things under control, until you know that it would work out. If he doesn't…well, then there's nothing you can do about it. You're you, it's not your fault that he can't see you as his girlfriend. In such cases, I would advise you to just forget about it, because there isn't a big chance of him changing his mind."

"But there is a chance?"

"Orihime, guys…don't change their opinions. And…there are some who take advantage of girls' feelings."

"Oh, Ku…He's not like that, I know." She assured her, but Soi had guessed it.

"Inoue…you're not worried about whether you're pretty or no, are you?" she asked "You're worried about why Kurosaki wants to change class."

The girl blushed, and stared at the ground. "No, of course not."

"Do you know why…"

"Oh, look at the time!" she said "I better run! I'll be late for cooking class. Thank you for talking to me, sensei! Goodbye."

* * *

During practice, Soi couldn't stop thinking about what she had heard. Inoue Orihime had a crush on Kurosaki. Kurosaki wanted to move into another class. Why? Had he learned about it and decided that it was best to get away from her? It didn't look like something Ichigo would do, given the fact that he was too dense to figure out how she felt for him. Besides, he was a gentleman. He would've been careful, but wouldn't go as far as to transfer.

And he definitely would've let her in. She had made it clear that everyone could talk. Obviously, his personal reasons extended further than Orihime, and he didn't want to tell her.

After practice, she and Sun-sun always stayed behind. Soi liked to leave places as she found them, and Sun-sun had been in charge of cleaning since forever. The girl was strangely easy to talk to, and the conversation between the two was always light and pleasing. Strange, because Sun-sun was so quiet and serious in class, people got the impression she was anti-social. Despite the fact that she was the class representative, few people other than her brother talked to her. She went to the student council meetings, helped Uliquorra-sensei in the doctor's office and fenced, but she wasn't as rich in friends as she was in talents.

Which was a shame. People relied on her because she was reliable, and never seemed to return all the favors she ran for them. Soi made a mental note to scold some of the other kids on the team into helping her out with the cleaning.

"You seemed preoccupied today, sensei." She noted as they headed towards the dressing rooms. Some girls were finishing up, some were still in the showers. Soi had taken the neighboring locker to Sun-sun's, so that they could talk. There were always the teacher's rooms, but today the young woman had slept in, missing her morning shower, and she had to see Yamamoto today for Kurosaki's request. And while she had no trouble parading around in her drawers, she wasn't sure Kuchiki would appreciate the view.

"Did I? Forgive me, Sun-sun-san, I just had something on my mind." Soi noted as she released her braids from the chignon she had pulled them in for practice. "Do you have any plans for the summer?"

"I must study, so I asked father to excuse me from the family trip to Nagasaki this year." She replied "I also agreed to help out Uliquorra-sensei with his work, since the better half of the school teams remain here and will practice throughout the summer. Though a lot of people from my team will go. I guess there won't be any practice this summer."

"I'm not going anywhere, mind." Soi replied "I can practice with you."

"You're not planning on visiting your family?"

"My parents…" she frowned "…my parents currently reside in a hot spring resort to cure their rheumatism. As part of their treatment, they have cut off most of their ties with the life out here. I doubt that it would do well for them if I came around. Besides, I have plenty of work to do here, Sun-sun-san. There are quite a few people from the other classes who need help with their English, and summer is the best time for catching up with lessons."

"Well...the exercise would only do me good. If it isn't any trouble…"

"Of course not." She smiled "I'd love to help."

* * *

A couple of showers were freed and the two quickly stepped under them. Soi frowned at the spray of cold water splashing in her face-the bathrooms in the gym needed serious work, but Yamamoto couldn't do anything about it until July.

"You have beautiful hair, sensei." Sun-sun noted from her left, calmly as usual "Did it take you many years to grow it this long?"

"Kinda. But it's a real pain sometimes. I can only wear it braided and tied back so that it wouldn't be a bother." She noted "And washing it is a complete mess."

Sun-sun didn't reply. As Soi stood under the shower, a thought crossed her mind, although she wasn't sure whether she wanted to explore it. She rubbed the shampoo into her long locks before letting the water rinse it off, all the time thinking about how to pose the question so that it wouldn't be taken as prying.

"Do you know what got into Kurosaki lately?" she finally began "He wants to change classes."

"His reasons probably do him justice." Sun-sun replied "But I'm sure it has nothing to do with you, sensei. You teach us all well. Everybody improved since you arrived."

"And as much as a relief that is, I still wish I knew why he wants to go to that other class. I'm supposed to see Yamamoto-sensei today for it and I can't defend his request if he asks for justification."

"I imagine that it's a very hard situation. He must follow your work here strictly, and it wouldn't be good if one of your students to want to change class. However, there is nothing as far as tuition goes that would explain why Kurosaki-kun would request a transfer."

"And as far as tuition doesn't go?" Soi turned towards her student to look at her. Sun-sun did the same. For a split second she saw something in the girl's eyes, but it quickly passed "Sun-sun-san, do you know his reasons?"

"I am not friends with Kurosaki-kun to know the inner workings of his mind." She shook her head, sending small drops of crystal water flying around her. "But I have seen enough to make a good guess."

"And do you think that you should share that same secrecy he seems to entertain?"

"It is no secret to someone who knows everything about everybody." Sun-sun stated as she turned off the water and took her towel off the rack

"But nobody notices that you know everything, right?" Soi asked, following her out of the showers. The locker rooms were empty now. Sun-sun dried herself off and started to put her clothes on.

"No. Nobody notices. Thus I am not obliged, directly, as anybody's confidant, to keep a secret. However, I doubt that Yamamoto-sensei will appreciate Kurosaki's reasons as justifiable for a transfer."

"I'm not asking you for his reasons to share them with Yamamoto-sensei. I just want to know how to react and what to say when I have to defend his transfer." Soi eyed her carefully "Is this about a girl."

"Indeed, although I am not sure to what extent these feelings go." Sun-sun replied "And before you say anything, sensei, I give you my own musings and observations on the matter."

"It's still better than anything I've gotten so far." Soi said and, sitting down on the bench, prepared to listen.

"Well, last February, as every year, was the school trip, and the sophomores went skiing together. Kurosaki had brought a note saying that he needed to sit by the aisle of the bus, and he had to stay behind with the second group, along with the classes with the families of teachers. Apparently, he got into a fight with a girl he was paired up with during the ride, and throughout the entire holiday, they always seemed to be together. Somehow, he ended up in a room next to hers, or something like that, then they were with the same skiing group, at the same table…"

"And something happened somewhere along the way and the arguing turned into cooing."

"No, they still fought. But they did it less. Although I do not know if it ever came down to a verbal expression of the sentiments in question, Kurosaki seems down ever since he came back from the trip. The only reason I can come up with is Kuchiki-san."

"Kuchiki-san?"

"Kuchiki Rukia-san, the adoptive sister of Kuchiki-sensei."

"I see." Soi nodded "So Kurosaki's lovesick."

"That is a great way to summarize it. Do you plan to tell this to Yamamoto-sensei?" Sun-sun asked slowly.

"As you said, he wouldn't appreciate the reason, and I don't have a real reason. But thank you for enlightening me, Sun-sun. At least now I'd know what to do."

She started changing. However, Sun-sun stared at her long after their conversation had ended.

* * *

A/N-Review, people! And please check out my new crossover story! PLEASE!

* * *


	7. Life in the ashes 1

* * *

It started small. So small she didn't foresee the disaster at first. Although many things told her of the troubles that lay ahead, she didn't, or refused to, comprehend them.

Perhaps, when she went back, she could point out the moment when she laid eyes on Soi Fong as the beginning of the folly, but Sun-sun was smart enough to know that there was a lot more than a meeting that triggered this. Her past, her family background, and her own quiet and grave nature had been the elements who prepared the seed of this…madness for the time when it would grow and give fruit.

However, she wasn't so willing to analyze it in this light when it raged with full force into her soul.

At first, as all great follies, Sun-sun found a perfectly logical explanation for the butterflies in her stomach and the excitement that magically took over her whenever her sensei was mentioned. Soi Fong was, after all, a competent, if stern teacher, who loved her subject and passed that enthusiasm on her students. She wasn't like Kyoraku Shunsui, the man who taught them French, who waxed eloquent about the advantages the language gave them, but Soi Fong knew how to make things interesting, and that was what made everyone like her so much. She was an admirable teacher, and Sun-sun only thought it natural that she should be admired. At some point, she naively believed that all her classmates felt the same. That, of course, was before the dreams came.

In truth, they had always been there. Not like a permanent part of her life, but from time to time, there were those dreams-cold, musical, abstract. She only remembered the sensations, and she had accepted them as natural.

But then they started to change, and she could no longer ignore it. First, it was the impression of an intruder in the strictly regular reverie. Then, graduately, details added up-cold, but strong arms that embraced her; graceful hands with long fingers that made her crazy; soft skin; a hushed voice whispering her name, hardly distinguishing behind their uneven breaths; long, black hair, pitch dark and silky; and in the end, her sensei's face, so beautiful it was hard to believe it was real.

With the things that started happening in those dreams, Sun-sun was glad that the warm weather permitted her to wear comfortable, large garments that had a lot of breathing space. Sometimes, she woke to find herself drenched in sweat, breathless, body aching with a desire she could not comprehend. The intensity of the feelings and the violence of the fits she went through scared her, and there were a few nights when she nearly thought her family had discovered her.

Mercifully, it was a large house, so everyone had their own room, and Sun-sun's strange condition remained unknown to the rest of the Aizen family. And while she managed to put up her façade, on the inside, she was slowly going crazy.

Perhaps this was Halibel's fault, but Sun-sun had no strength to blame her. As it was, that woman had done enough to make her unhappy, she wasn't going to add another offence to the list. But, with things getting out of control the girl soon started dreading going to bed. Who knew what would happen tonight? Sometimes, the two only hugged in the dreams, sometimes they listened to each other's voices without touching, and sometimes…sometimes they did things so unthinkable Sun-sun marveled at them. And the hopelessness of the situation was only depressing her more.

Going to Momo for a council on this matter was impossible. It was enough to put Momo and 'sex' into the same sentence to know that you'll never get anything useful out of a conversation with her stepmother, and even if she did have the guts to go to her with this problem, she was more likely to tell her father, who would send her to a psychiatrist. Or, even worse, involve her sensei into this.

Sun-sun didn't want to think about that happening. The shame, the embarrassment, and her father accusing her of invoking those dreams into his daughter…just imagining it wanted to make her crawl into some dark place and die. And if that wasn't enough, sometimes she felt disgusted with herself for making up some of the things that happened. They were frighteningly real, and the worst part was that there was way she could've made them up, which probably made her…naturally inclined to be…

She didn't let the thoughts get to her. She shunned the dreams away into the darkest corners of her mind, and did her best not to stare at her sensei. But it was there, and when night fell, it came back.

* * *

Little did she know that the object of her worst fears didn't feel any better.

Soi's dreams started a little after the conference, and unlike Sun-sun's, they cleared up pretty soon. The young woman woke up in a similar condition to her student's, but unlike her, the reactions were a lot more familiar and a lot more frightening. Because, if for Sun-sun these dreams were glimpses of a world that by this moment appeared surreal and unreachable, for Soi they were a reminder of a much, much darker aspect of her nature she preferred to hide.

* * *

Sun-sun's family prepared to go on a one-month trip to Nagasaki, leaving the house to her care. Her brother Luppi swore by everything holy that he would have fun for both of them while she studied to get them both forward, and her father applauded her selflessness while secretly making arrangements with neighbors to check up on her. At this point, she was so worked up over the dreams that little else mattered, and the trip offered her the prospect of some peace to deal with her troubles.

While students counted the last days to the long-awaited break, Soi made plans with the principle and her colleagues. Unohana-san was to go visit her family in Hokkaido, so she and Kuchiki Byakuya would go out drinking alone for a while, but most of the people would stick around for extra lessons, which helped set her plan in motion.

The last day, in homeroom, she decided that it was high time it started. Going up to Ichigo, without beating about the bush, she informed him that his request had been denied.

"But why?" the strawberry asked "Didn't you tell them that I had personal reasons to ask for this transfer?"

"Don't speak to me in that tone, Kurosaki." She said, looking down her nose at him "I told them everything you told me, that you requested the transfer because you had personal reasons. However, given the fact that I couldn't specify those reasons, the request was denied. Furthermore, Unohana-sensei let me in on your aspirations to go to med school, and that she was preparing you for the exams there. If you changed class, she couldn't help you, so naturally, I decided that it's for your own good that you stay in this class."

"But…" he frowned "…I…I do need to go to that class."

"You don't want to be a doctor then?"

"Yes, I want to be a doctor. That's…"

"Then that's that. Close your mouth and sit up straight." She ordered him, turned on her heel and stoop up in front of the whole class. "Everyone, may I have your attention please. As you know, after this class is over, you'll be set free to roam the cyber space and parks of this fair world and I will have no control over you. So, let's use our time together fully, shall we. As you know, the lamentable loss of Kurosaki has been postponed, so you guys can call off the good-bye parties."

Ichigo rolled his eyes and murmured something under his breath.

"Second, I have distributed your assignments for the summer, and I suggest you take them very seriously, Keigo-kun. For those of you not flying off to some exotic destination, most club activities will not be cancelled for the next two months, but for more information you should consult the message board. Finally…Matsumoto-sensei and I have discussed the possibility of a little co-project between the classes we are teaching. This is about a small drama club in the summer, whose purpose will be to prepare and set up a small play for the school festival…in English, thus helping you out with the language and developing your skills. Since it's only for those of you who remain here, the undiscovered talents among you shall have to wait for Matsumoto-sensei to get really drunk again, but fear not-I like the initiative. The troupe will be assembled from the students of both our classes, which means you will work with people you don't know, so I strongly suggest that if you guys can't cope with strangers, don't sign up. I'm giving you this list, write your names under those of Matsumoto-sensei's students, and give it back to me."

The clip-on was thrown at the first row, where a student quickly scribbled down her name and decorated it with flowers and birds. While she watched the list advance through the rows, Soi Fong continued to speak. "We'll pull a casting for the roles, but be assured-those of you who have stage fright or don't feel like acting will have a place among our group of directors, which means that you'll order the actors around and paint decors. Your level of English must also be good, and your understanding of Shakespeare as well, since it's very likely we choose one of his works as our victim." She noticed that Kurosaki livened up when the list reached his table. The boy read through it fervently, before he wrote his name down. He put so much pressure he broke his pencil. Soi barely suppressed an urge to shake her head.

"So…" after she got her list, she beamed at her class "This was the last announcement I wanted to make. Don't drink, don't smoke, don't have sex with animals and I expect to see your homework first thing when you get back. Class dismissed."

* * *

Sun-sun chewed on her pen, trying hard to focus on the page in front of her, but to no end. Summer was here, which meant a lot of tête-à-têtes with her sensei, fencing practice and talk in the changing room. The suspicions creeping up on her were so horrible she couldn't stop worrying. What if she noticed her state? There would surely be questions, and the embarrassing truth would come out. Of course, she could rely on her incredible self-control, but Sun-sun suspected that it wouldn't help after a month of work-out with Soi Fong.

And that wasn't the worst part yet…She blamed an evil spirit, or a temporary loss of sanity on the fact that she signed up for the drama club. Honestly, she had never done anything so…impulsively, without even bothering to think what her father would say about it. Aizen Sosuke was extremely keen on knowing what his kids did in their free time, and she wasn't sure that drama class would be that well accepted. Not to mention that Soi Fong would be there…she really should've thought about it more carefully.

"Before you devour that appliance, I would advise you to leave it be." Uliquorra's voice reached her ears and her jaw muscles obeyed immediately. Her mouth gaped open and the pen fell down on the table with a wet plop. "Well…after this slightly disturbing display…will you care to tell me what got you into such a bad mood today? It's summer break. You should be dancing on the chair with joy to be out of this torture chamber."

"Have you ever seen me dance, sensei?"

"No. So will you tell me what's gotten into you?"

Not what, who, but she refused to tell him that. However…the dreams had been piling up for nearly a month now. Her family wouldn't leave for another week. Sun-sun felt like a jack in a box, whose string was whined up to the uttermost limit. A little more and she would burst-she needed to get the weight off, tell somebody. Her parents were as far away from this as they could be, especially her father, and the only one of her sisters who could give her any sort of relevant advice was Mila-Rose, and the two were on such terms that they were nearly strangers. They had never talked…like this. Nobody in this family shared with their other siblings, especially if they were from the two different camps-pre-Momo and after-Momo. Luppi spoke to her, but he wasn't able to tell her anything about the sphere in which she was interested. Mila-Rose was away from their father's influence and she could tell her what she wanted to know, but as things were, she would be exiled pretty soon and nobody could speak to her. Uliquorra, on the other hand, was a doctor, and he was discreet enough to go about this with tact.

Reluctantly, Sun-sun told him about the dreams. To her credit, she managed to keep the person's name in secret, but thanks to her mentor's infamous stare of Death, she betrayed the fact that it was a woman.

On his part, he listened to her story without interrupting her and without showing any emotions that these statements might provoke. Thankfully, he wasn't the person to be revolted of a confession like hers. Was he used to this, she wondered as she finished her narrative and he opened his mouth to speak.

"This certainly does not appear like something you could come up with, Sun-sun. Does anything in your previous life suggest that you would have dreams like these?"

"Nothing. I've never even been kissed before." She said

"At all? Or just by boys?"

"At all."

"And you never thought it was strange?"

"The fact that I haven't been kissed? I…I could blame the lack of boyfriend to school or my father, but the truth is that I never really wanted one." She shrugged "I guess I never had an idea of what to do with one."

"But now…do you blame it on a lack of interest in men?"

"I really don't know. Nothing seems to have changed, but my…feelings for that sole person. Everyone is exactly the same. My classmates, my teachers, my relatives…"

"Well…" he replied after a short thought "I don't see what you should be worried about."

"Sensei, with all due respect, I have everything to be worried about. You see how this lack of sleep is affecting me? Think of what will happen if it continues."

"It will not continue if you put a rein to it." he said "And you can put a rein to it, believe me. Many boys and girls…like yourself, go through a period of their lives in which they experience a, I dare say, raw desire to explore the world around them, and often, that is expressed through their…sexuality. They get confused, their feelings are mixed, and they often mistake the real thing for…simple curiosity. In your case, I am inclined to think that these dreams are the product of stress, combined with your lack of interest in all things sexual."

"But I do understand what sex is about. I know everything that is connected with it."

"And how do you feel about it? What do you think of this whole…activity? Do you picture yourself doing it?"

"No…." despite herself, she blushed "No, I never even thought about it! Until now that is…"

"That is why. These things do not manifest themselves as openly as others. Sometimes, we oppress our true desires and the feelings pile up until they cannot be kept at bay. You're not interested in sex because…I suppose because you find it unnecessarily painful and bothersome and feel quite comfortable the way you are. However, you body may think otherwise, and thanks to all the pressure you've been under this year, you glands started producing high levels of pheromones that cause the overexcitement and your mind creates on sub-conscious level the dreams to create a…stimuli for the pheromones to work. Since you associate the bad aspects with heterosexual sex, your mind is giving you…homosexual."

"And…what explanation can you give for the…for the things…those dreams are so REAL, sensei! I…I never thought things like this existed."

"What things?"

Sun-sun blushed, stammered, and closed her mouth stubbornly.

"Listen, you are a smart girl." Uliquorra said "Your imagination may be more active than it appears, even to you. The most important thing is that you couldn't explain those dreams to yourself and you were scared-not because of any consequences of them, but of the dreams themselves. Now that you know what triggers them and you know exactly what they are, you could control them, and with that, your body. Do you understand?"

"I think so." She nodded, slightly relieved "Sensei, how do you know so much about dreams?"

"I don't." came the flat reply "But I've had students with the same symptoms wheeled in front of me during my years and I can tell when they're suffering from lovesickness or stress. Believe me, there is nothing to be scared of if you've never experienced the real thing. And the fact that you have never been informed of this only made things worse for you. If you want…" he opened his laptop and searched for something "You can read this while you're in the office. Educate yourself. Just don't tell your father."

"History and analysis of homosexuality in modern art and media." Sun-sun read "By….Nnoitra Jiruga?"

"Your teacher had to write a paper on that and they keep it in the university virtual library. It's a good piece of work. There's a list of the things mentioned in the end, if you want to continue your research. For your comfort, it's divided in two parts-yaoi and yuri. If you feel like reading more on the subject, the bibliography mentions the sources he used. Just don't try to talk to Nnoitra about it."

"Sensei…you think that this is going to…help me? What if anyone learns?"

"They have no right of access to my personal computer, so they cannot learn. And I believe that the source of all evil nowadays is usually in ignorance and pride. Parents believe that their children do not deserve to be informed of these things, so the children fall into the traps of reverse psychology. They go after the forbidden fruit. Your fear originates in your misinformation for the subject. Thus, if you are informed, you will stop being afraid.

Sun-sun bit her lip, then nodded.

"I understand. Thank you for your help."

* * *

A/N-Thanks for the reviews. They indeed lessened my frustration a bit. I always considered writing a pleasant hobby, but I'd like to have more insight on my mistakes. Any wishes, ideas or prompts are very welcome. Please, a story isn't just about the writer, the readers help a lot. So please, s'il vous plait, por favor, onegai shimasu...review.


	8. Life in the ashes 2

One faux pas…and the pristine dream had turned into a nightmare. Soi tossed and turned, her hands gripping blindly at space until, her body burning with desire and pain until…it couldn't take it anymore. Her back arched and her muscles tensed to a point where it was almost torturous before they finally gave out. She woke up a second before she collapsed back on the bed, eyes wide with desperation and fear.

She stared at the plain white ceiling, before cursing angrily and freeing herself from the tangled sheets. Her bare feet made a loud noise as she headed towards the bathroom. Her nightshirt was sweat-soaked and cold, clinging onto her body uncomfortably. Soi took it off and tossed it into the laundry basket with a little too much force, as if it was the one responsible for her troubles.

But there really wasn't anyone else to blame, she thought as she examined her slender frame into the mirror. She couldn't understand why she had such dreams, or why would Sun-sun, of all people, be in them, but they were taking their tool off her and with the summer break starting, it meant a great deal of trouble. Why couldn't she have a little more control over herself? Hadn't she had enough?

Feeling disgusted with herself, Soi stepped into the shower and turned the spray on, letting the sudden heat shock free her from all coherent thought for at least a few minutes.

But the thoughts didn't waste time to return as soon as her body got used to the sudden torture. She could subject herself to cold water and other silly purification methods, but in truth this subject had already been discussed and worn, even before she came to Japan. Even before she was forced to come to Japan.

Had there really not been some sign that she might turn out like this? Her parents were strict, and though she agreed with them that academic success stood before everything, she liked her freedom. Naturally, like every child under pressure, she had done silly things, but they hadn't been horrid beyond amends. Actually, until she got into college, she hadn't even dated anyone, let alone been kissed or touched in a way that could be considered intimate. Never, safe for one time she had taken great care to forget….

But once she had been safe into university, her parents' influence had suddenly ceased. Five hundred miles away from her hometown, from any friends or people who could recognize her, Soi had almost literally opened her Pandora box. Her mother and father had probably decided that, since she was already in, nothing could go wrong, and they trusted that she knew better than to get into trouble. Had this been the trigger? Or just another event in a whole series of such that had led to what happened?

At first everything had been fine. She'd successfully entered a sorority, even though she didn't appear to be the popular girl material, and she'd started attending the lectures in English Philology. Her hopes were high, her grades were even higher-she aspired to become a teacher, or even a university professor, take a large house and become famous for her studies in literature.

Strangely enough, her 'sisters' from the house didn't seem to be much like her. Their dreams involved a successful career, of course, but they also wanted families. Most of them were either engaged, or had serious boyfriends, and planned big weddings and christenings as if they were the most natural thing to happen. Soi was a part of the minority that didn't think about a three-storage cake and baby names, and strangely enough, she didn't even care. She knew that she would find a boyfriend eventually, so she didn't let it bother her.

However, she started dating during her sophomore year. His name was…Jake…Chad…Ken…damn, the football players all looked alike. She did remember he was considered a handsome catch.

How strange, she thought as she got out of the shower and wrapped herself up in a towel. It was only five years ago. Had she become such a workaholic that she forgot events that were, back then, so significant? Was his hair brown or blond? And his eyes? All she remembered about his eyes was that she thought they were poetic.

Did she love him? She didn't know that either. He was smart, handsome, and gentle, every girl's dream, he made up sonnets like he was talking, and he seemed to dote on her. However, she didn't remember loving him. She didn't even remember lusting after him. Had she only been curious? Right now, she considered sex to be an interesting activity, but…it seemed pointless to engage in it unless you really needed it.

Pity she wasn't so smart then.

Anyways, he cheated on her…or did somebody seduce him…or did he suddenly turn gay? She did recall she was very angry, so it was probably his fault…but then she paid him back with sleeping with another three guys by the end of the week. With that, the last bail had been removed and Soi was completely on the rampage.

Parties, field trips, special sleepovers, she was always there. She didn't miss a chance to play strip poker or roulette, just to show off a new bra and flirt. She'd been uninhabited, at best, and it was miraculous that her behavior didn't cause rumor to circulate around campus. She woke up in stranger's beds more often, and by some turn she never ended up with VD or pregnant. As if fate had been encouraging her to keep it up…but she knew better than that. She was organized to a fault. Never did her partners forget condoms of pills. Never did she miss a check-up. And with her ability to learn everything the second she saw it, going to every lecture seemed impossible, giving her at least 20 more hours per week more available for her newfound hobby.

How many people did she bed during the next two years? She really didn't keep a count on them. Her professors knew, of course, but she never gave them a reason to reproach her for it. Prodigious or not, though, they would've snapped eventually. Thankfully, she did it before them.

She had woken up one morning after a particularly wild night, and thanks to her incredible self-control, managed to straighten herself out and go back to her room before the crack of dawn. The day had progressed in its usual mediocre way, boring as Hell and lightened only by the prospect of a party that evening. On her way back from class, she had heard some of her inmates talking about a wedding that had recently happened and, after hearing who the lucky couple was, Soi couldn't hide her surprise. Didn't Surely and Tom still dating? Weren't they going to wait for him to get to Law School and lay some money aside? It turned out they had, months ago, and hadn't wasted time to get married.

Ignoring the looks she received, Soi darted towards her room and bolted the door behind her, her heart thrumming in her chest. Slowly, she had walked towards her bed and opened the suitcase she used as a makeshift wardrobe there. The same clothes she had left home with. For two years, she had only gone shopping for lingerie. Sitting back on her heels, she stared dumbly at the garments and blinked owlishly, before slumping forward on the bed and crying like she hadn't done since she was a child.

Two years. She had spent two years, from which she didn't have any notable memories. Lectures, exams, sex, and that had been all. She didn't remember going out with friends, she didn't remember attempting to make friends, and she…gods, she had been into a standstill, a total mental standstill. What was worse, as Soi rummaged through her brain for something, anything, she'd discovered with horror that for the past few months, her partners had been totally and exclusively female. Not only she had entirely lost her inhibitions, but those same-sex encounters had actually seemed more pleasant to her than anything. Crème de la crème, as Stella Mayfair had said.

From tears she had gone to hysterics to total shock. Her roommate, a quiet girl she hadn't spoken to in years, was actually surprised to find her on her bed, staring up with eyes as wide as dinner plates. The poor thing had quickly forgotten all offences and had tried bringing her to, actually made her a cup of tea and eventually, when Soi was capable of using her voice, listened to her confession, despite that some parts of it made her blush hard like a tomato.

Mizuho…yes, that's how her roommate was called…she actually had the strength to listen to her and offer some worthwhile advice. It had been a hard time for her. It wasn't like being cheated on by your first was something one should take easily. If it were here, she would've been furious. She kept it up in the same tone, before she had said that it was a good thing nothing bad happened to her and that she was ready to move on with her life. Soi had listened, nodding mechanically, but when Mizuho had gone to sleep, she thought it over and decided that there was much more to it than a period of nymphomania there to resent.

She had lost control. Utterly and totally. And while nothing was there to remind her of that period in her life, other than a few kinky outfits and fancy lingerie, she couldn't stand the thought that she had acted so wholly and utterly without a rein on her actions or emotions. For the next few days, she had been into a state of acute awareness, dreading that anyone should talk to her and refer to her unrestrained behavior.

Surprisingly, nobody did that. Soi was so good losing herself into the crowd that nobody remembered her from parties, or poker sessions, or anything else. Maybe somebody recognized her, but seeing her antisocial attitude, they had probably brushed the suspicion off. After a while, she breathed somewhat freely, but there was still a weight in her chest that kept her on her toes.

Mizuho graduated that year, but not before helping Soi find an anonymous support group for "people like her", as her roommate had said. They never spoke to each other again…Soi never knew whether she had cut her too deep or because they were both busy.

Whatever the case, she decided to start working hard to re-establish herself. She visited lectures regularly, stayed away from any social activity, went to the sessions of the support group…the latter didn't really help much but offer her a good excuse that could work for her consciousness, but it never gave her an explanation to her new-found liking to same-sex activities. But she did work and train fencing as hard as she could-not so much because she needed it than because the exhaustion took her mind off thinking about the past.

Surprisingly, the physical need for sex wasn't as irresistible as she had feared it to be, and after one year, she graduated with flying colors and the trust of her professors re-established. However, some things would never be the same again-she could never rid herself of the guilt entirely, and her hopes and dreams were not as grand as before. All she wanted was to disappear in the crowd…and she managed that, somehow.

* * *

Soi poured herself a cup of tea and sat down to watch the dawn from her window, musing over how things had turned out afterwards. She successfully managed to stay away from all activities that could turn her into a sex-crazed fiend again, but her job at the girls-only school put her face to face with the problems she had overlooked as a teenager-oppressive parents, a desire to be popular, curiosity, boldness, a wish to be the very best, a wish to _oppose_…It had soon become clear that she couldn't just sit back and watched, so she had pushed the fact that she was a hypocrite on the back of her mind and preached alongside with the nuns about emotional chastity and purity. When that didn't work, well….she found other ways, some of them like what she did now.

But why did she decide to involve herself with a man? Soi played with her cup as she rummaged her brain for an answer. Really, why? Nobody invoked feelings of love or lust into her, male or female, yet she was still afraid. Was she ashamed because of what happened with Yoruichi and her behavior in university? Everything seemed like ancient history now.

Well, she decided, she needn't have bothered looking for a guy and then betrothing him, if he turned out to be such a whiny pansy. But, she couldn't help feeling that a boy toy would come in real handy right now. Those stupid dreams didn't leave her to rest, and it was driving her too close to despair. It wasn't decent! She could excuse herself for her actions five years ago, but she had been there and done it, so she had to leave it behind. She, supposedly, knew better than to let her feelings get so out of hand. And concoct such thoughts regarding a student of hers! It was unbearable! It was disgusting! It was absolutely unacceptable! Especially if that student was slowly becoming her friend. She valued Sun-sun, she acknowledged her qualities and accomplishments. It wasn't fair to her, even if what she didn't know couldn't hurt her.

* * *

Soi took advantage of the next day to do some work, keeping her mind successfully from wandering. She made up her schedule for the next three months and checked how her plans were getting along. She had to bring the plays that they would discuss on the first meeting, which meant she had to choose them out. Work, work…

At sunset, she got out of the house and headed through the park towards the shopping district to pick up some groceries and enjoy a nice walk. She successfully managed to buy enough to keep her loaded for a week, and headed back, balancing the heavy objects in her arms.

Engrossed with her own thoughts, she failed to notice the tall figure coming towards her, and thus the voice that spoke to her startled her to no end. "Good evening, Soi Fong-sensei."

"Good evening…Kuchiki-sensei…" She replied, taking a deep breath to calm herself "I apologize, I didn't see you there."

"It is understandable. Can I offer you my assistance?" without waiting for an answer, he took one of her bags and started walking alongside her

"That is really not necessary." She replied, but accepted his help anyway "So what brings you here? I fancy to Kuchiki manor is a great deal too far away."

"It is." He nodded "But I suddenly felt like taking a walk. I rarely have the chances of enjoying a solitary reverie at present, and I value the solitude a lot."

"Then should I leave you to yourself?"

"That would be pointless, since I am already with you. Are you enjoying the break?"

"It's only been one day, but yes." She lied "You really needn't help me, though. We're almost at my home."

"Am I imposing on you?"

"No, but I find your behavior a little strange. You don't seem like you often come this way."

He nodded.

"Yes, I was feeling somehow…lacking a companion. I suppose I came here unconsciously looking for you. It has been a while since we last went out."

"Then can I persuade you to join me for dinner. I'm sure it's nothing to your elaborate meals, but I think food tastes better in good company." She said, forcing her dark mood back and trying to be cheerful

"I gladly accept." He nodded.

What was she doing? She asked herself that all while she opened her apartment door, led him in, apologized for the mess and cleaned up the counter. It was very impolite to settle her guest in the kitchen, but the bedroom was not meant to be seen and the bathroom just wasn't big enough for both of them to have a comfortable meal in it. Kuchiki didn't seem to bother, sitting down on the table and watching her quickly concoct a miso soup and yakizana. They chatted about some random subjects before the food was ready, and then took the first bites in silence.

"Allow me to compliment you, Soi Fong-san. You cooking is excellent." He finally said

"I humbly thank you for the acknowledgement. I'm aware that you have tasted dishes more superior than mine in their refinement."

"Like you said, the good company matters more than the food." He replied "Actually, I wanted to discuss something with you. About that summer project you and Matsumoto-sensei are starting."

"Ah, yes. I heard that your sister has decided to take place. I'm looking forward to working with her…Matsumoto-san has very high praise of her skills in English."

"I hope that you are not choosing to put up a…very modern play."

"No, only Shakespeare…or Jane Austen, if they wish. It's what we're teaching right now, so we'll just have to see who they want better."

"Teaching Jane Austen to unimpressionable young minds is exactly what Matsumoto-sensei would do." Kuchiki said

"She teaches her well, nevertheless. But fear not-we will not put forward anything inappropriate."

"Make no mistake, I do not even doubt for a minute your judgment. It is just that Rukia is the only close family I have, and I do not want to see her in a situation that would compromise her in any way."

"I'll make sure nothing inappropriate happens on stage." She said "Rukia-san is your sister, then. I'm surprised that I haven't seen her around much."

"She…keeps to her friends and classmates, and we meet enough at home." He said, a little uneasy "She really is not related to me by blood, but she was my wife's sister, and after Hisana…passed away, I decided to adopt Rukia into the clan. She was too young to earn her living then, and she has proven to be an obedient girl…if not exactly brilliant."

"I'm sure she does her best to please you." Soi said "But you have a large family, do you not?"

"Yes. And they were disappointed at first when I chose to take on such an…ordinary and starless profession as a teacher's. But now they are glad that my actions do not attract unnecessary attentions from the media."

"The paparazzi don't think you're worth the trouble."

"Yes. I believe they consider me too…dull. The only thing that blew up in the papers was my marriage, and that was years ago." He sighed "But for such a large family, being a part of the Kuchiki clan is a very lonesome fate."

"I believe I know what you mean, Kuchiki-san." She nodded, a little surprised at his sudden wistfulness. Kuchiki Byakuya hadn't struck her before as such a talkative guy. "Or at least some of it."

"Ah, yes…"

"Yamamoto-san…spoke to you about my previous position?"

"No, but he did mention that…your fiancé did not agree with your moving here and that caused you to end your relationship."

"He exaggerated things. Actually, the fact that we broke off our relations is a part of my reasons why I came. Still…I'm afraid I do miss him. In some ways more than others."

"Indeed." He nodded, before going back to his food. Then she pulled out a pair of mismatched glasses and offered him some wine.

"I apologize if I cannot offer you anything better." She said as she poured the liquid "Unfortunately, this apartment doesn't provide more than the most basic of needs and I haven't received guests yet."

"That is a shame. You are by all means not friendless. I am sure that if you invite people over, you'll feel more at ease." He noted, giving the room a brief look "I must say I am surprised, though. Your home is very…Spartan in its simplicity."

"You can say I use my job as an excuse not to make it more homely. Although I spend a great deal of time here, its state never really bothers me."

"Perhaps later, when…you feel more at ease in Japan." He said "Kampai."

"Kampai." She nodded, taking a sip from her wine and wincing at the bitterness of it, thinking all the time what to do. Had he just suddenly made an invitation towards something…more? She eyed him carefully.

"Soi Fong-san?" he asked, probably enquiring after her curious expression "Are you alright?"

"Yes." She forced an easy look on her face "Never been better." Rising to her feet, she cleared the table and started doing the dishes. "Kuchiki-san…may I ask a personal question?"

"Go ahead."

"Have you ever tried filling the gap…that people leave when they are gone?"

He remained silent for a minute, contemplating, probably, whether he should reply or leave. "I am afraid that even a boring man such as myself cannot escape the calamity that a relationship might cause…Especially in a family like mine. We're not in America, Soi Fong-san. People start a relationship when their intentions are more or less serious."

"Yet you don't seem to mind my American discourtesy."

"No, I don't. Because I already know you and respect you." Why did it not surprise her?

There was a rustle of clothing behind her as he rose from his chair and walked toward her. Soi rinsed the last glass from the soap and left it to dry just as he stopped right behind her. As she started drying her hands in the towel, a delicate hand brushed a few dark bangs away and rested on her neck, feeling the white skin and checking the pulse. A familiar dizziness washed over her as she barely turned around to look at his eyes, before lacing her fingers with his and, without turning to face him, led him towards her bedroom.

The situation was new and yet terribly normal for her…for the first time, she hazarded ruining a friendship to start a relationship. Suddenly, she remembered a verse from Lamartine's Elegie:

_Cueillons, cueillons la rose au matin de la vie;  
Des rapides printemps respire au moins les fleurs.  
Aux chastes voluptés abandonnons nos coeurs,  
Aimons-nous sans mesure, à mon unique amie!_

That night she had sex with Kuchiki Byakuya for the first time…and once more, she did not feel the emptiness in her heart being filled. It was wrong, she knew, but what could she do? Could she hasard to continue with these feelings, knowing that Sun-sun trusted her completely and took her as a friend? Her colleague knew exactly what he was getting into, and maybe, just maybe they would be able to suffocate the pain.

Despite the fact that she did not feel much, she did not hear a voice trying to stop her like she had before. Everything about that man was silence and solitude. Even as they undressed in the graduately darkening room, even as they laid on the futon she had set up on the floor (they feared that the creaking of the mattress would give them away to her neighbors), Soi felt incredibly alone. They embraced in the summer twilight, without a word, and then came without a sound. It was neither a dream not a nightmare, just…a fever she had to extinguish. His hands, skillful and strong, held her, teased her, gave and took at the same time, yet while her body was racked in pleasure, her soul and mind remained absolutely and perfectly alone. He was probably like this too, Soi thought, but she didn't hold back on him and kept up with him until the very end.

Then it was over. First her, then him, then they both collapsed down on the floor, and the thud from the impact seemed like the only sound they had made ever since they had started. Absent-mindedly, Soi remembered the last verses of that poem, before drifting off to a mercifully blanc dream.

_Nous allons échouer, tous, au même rivage :  
Qu'importe, au moment du naufrage,  
Sur un vaisseau fameux d'avoir fendu les airs,  
Ou sur une barque légère  
D'avoir, passager solitaire,  
Rasé timidement le rivage des mers?_

A/N-Sorry, I can't offer a good translation in English. I'm afraid that poems should be read in their original, otherwise it's impossible to feel their meaning. Anyway...j'attends vos comptes-rendus. Any suggestions or requests will be taken into account, though I can't promise that I'll manage with all of them.

* * *


	9. Frozen

Wow, it's been a while, ne? Sorry to keep you waiting, I hope this pleases you.

Theme song: _Frozen_ by **Within Temptation**

* * *

Sun-sun stared out the window, watching the sunset over the rooftops, bored out of her skin. The day was so monotonous she wanted to scream-she'd gone over lessons she already knew by heart, filled college applications she could already do by heart, read for exams she was a hundred percent ready for, and was now watching views so familiar it was painful. In an attempt to help herself, she'd began making up definitions of different expressions she'd heard, and had so far gone to the letter B.

_Breaking point-the limit which you couldn't pass physically and mentally whole._

Her eyes shut and her forehead wrinkled. If only she could read those books Uliquorra sensei had let her read, but she was afraid to access the link through her computer at home, as if her father could walk in the room anytime and see her. The heat crawled on her skin and she shook her head-why did it have to be so damn hard? Mila Rose had managed, so why couldn't she?

But Mila Rose had been free-spirited since the beginning. The 'expel' was only the last stage of it. Unlike her, Sun-sun was more concerned about keeping a semblance of peace in the family than anything else. Their father appeared calm and easy-going, but it didn't take more than a hint about their other biological parent to send him off the edge. Her eldest sister didn't care about anyone but herself-a rather selfish look upon things, but it made breaking off with everybody so much easier.

On the other hand, Sun-sun thought it wasn't fair for her to completely forget her life for the sake of her siblings. All Apache cared for was making pranks, she was just about as single-minded as Mila-Rose. Her greatest dream was probably to shag some guy, piss their father off and run away on the Bahamas. Luppi…he was nearly the same, only he thought more about fashion. Of course, he made it past with good grades, but really never put more effort, thinking that everything would come as easily as it did in school. And as for Tesla…Tesla who was so shy, Tesla who never let go of his sketchbook and who hardly said a word…he was such a gentle being, Sun-sun couldn't help wanting to protect him. And he seemed to soften up towards her more than towards anybody else…

But what was to become of them if she was gone? Of course, they probably didn't care for her that much, but…

She sighed again-thinking too much was never good. Tomorrow, she would have drama class and fencing, which meant that she would need all the extra energy she could get. Straightening herself up slowly, she walked towards her bed, peeling off her clothes one by one.

Reading the books and comics on yuri had been good and bad. Bad, because it only made her dreams worse. Good, because it somehow made her a little more at ease with herself. At times, she even managed to get mad at her father for treating everyone like they had half a worth or something…Treating her as if she was inferior…just because…

She didn't let that train of thought get too far and focused on herself. Being the goody-goody two shoes was a survival skill, but now she realized that she'd been ignorant of too many things. Her sexuality for that matter had been a term that was almost alien in its abstraction. Being raised around Momo, who told you that girls married and boys went to work, had made her believe that marriage and children came hand in hand and that whatever had to be done in between would come naturally, like breathing. Sun-sun had learned what sex consisted in when she went to Health class in school, but all she had thought when she had watched the posters and plastic models there was that it probably hurt a lot. Why would anyone want to do it other than for reproduction purpose was beyond her comprehension.

And homosexuality was as far away from all that as the moon. Nobody mentioned the 'g' and 'l' words under Aizen Sosuke's roof, and Sun-sun never thought about being interested. How could two women love each other anyway? She had some vague idea about the men, but women? Not that she considered it gross or anything…she just thought that loving somebody of your own gender was nothing more than a passing fancy, a folly, something that couldn't last for long and that could only bring you some nasty disease. You can't really love another girl if your body obviously cannot.

Some of the things she'd read in the past days had been absolutely terrifying-not because of her body's reactions, mind, though they had been a surprise…no, but because the books had opened an entirely new world to her, a knowledge of how to pleasure and worship your beloved. Being in love with a woman, eternally in love with a woman, wasn't as surreal and impossible as she believed. Maybe, just maybe, she could embrace herself for what she was and find a woman that would love her.

But whether it could be her sensei was another question. She had to know if she really was interested in this, Sun-sun mused as she dressed herself in a thin cotton nightshirt and lied on the bed. And if she was, would she really go as far as to pursue a relationship with a student? Nobody would forgive that.

Well…it was a comforting thought that she would graduate soon enough. Sun-sun closed her eyes and thought of how wonderful it would be if everything was right. If she went into some remote little university and her sensei followed her, and that they would meet every day, speak, fence, drink coffee, go to the beach on sunny days and make love on the rainy ones….If she could only have her dark eyes, her wonderful face, her silky hair for herself…

Sun-sun closed her eyes and felt the familiar heat build up in her, first staining her cheeks red, and then moving down her body. Reaching out, she tugged the sheets around her body and lied on her stomach, as if afraid that somebody might walk in on her. For a while, she strained her ears to hear anything, but nothing happened.

She sighed-she needn't have been so worried. Her family was going to be away for at least a month, leaving her to her own devices. Of course, she knew her father monitored the computers in their home and called the neighbors every night to hear the same things she told him-nothing happened. The house is still there. Sun-sun doesn't go anywhere.

He must be so proud….or pissed because he couldn't find a reason to disown her like Mila-Rose.

* * *

_Sun-sun didn't know when she had drifted off to sleep, or how, but she had, because what was going on was certainly a dream._

_Lips on hers, dark eyes drilling into her own like daggers, soft hands running down her sides, first over the soft fabric of her clothes and then under. Her school blazer parted like the leaves of a dying flower making way for the fresher ones. Her nipples were already hard and stuck out through the fabric of her shirt like little pebbles (and naturally, today of all days she had forgone the bra). Her own eyes were dim and feverish, her eyelashes weighing down like stone, as if every caress she made lulled her to sleep._

_Sun-sun's head fell back as Soi kept kissing her, moving from her cheeks to her collarbone to her neck, occasionally lapping with her tongue at the soft, creamy skin. Slowly, she undid the black tie and opened up the collar of her shirt, and bit softly down on the hollow of her throat. The student's eyes widened and her legs wrapped around the other woman's hips, pulling her in instinctively. Soi pulled away enough to smile at her, before moving to caress her breasts through the thin cotton._

_"You're so pretty…so innocent and cute…" she purred, before bowing her head and biting on one nipple softly "I wonder if you've ever been kissed before."_

_"Never." Sun-sun whimpered, both with need and desperation. This couldn't stop. She wanted this. She couldn't take it any more. Her sensei grinned, then pushed herself up slowly, bringing her chest out to brush against her own and her pelvis weighing between Sun-sun's hips. The younger girl felt her eyes rolling on the back of her head and her lips opened instinctively for a raspy breath. Suddenly, Soi dived on her for another kiss-not airy and light, but hard, biting, and possessive. Teeth bit down and chew on her lower lip, before her tongue lapped soothing circles over it. Despite herself, Sun-sun moaned in pleasure._

_Soi let out a raspy moan, before moving a little higher so that her tongue could explore every cavity of her student's mouth, thus gagging any sound that she made. As she did that, one of her hands came down on her thigh and pulled her in closer, while the other one went to squeeze her ass. Their bodies were so close they felt like one, if it weren't for those annoying clothes that still bid them to this idiotic relationship as a teacher and student. Pulling away, she grinned down at the young girl, before she moved to kiss at her side, right next to her ear. The hand on her thigh started to stroke it, higher and higher until it was under the skirt and her soft fingertips brushed against the edge of her panties._

_"You've always been such a composed, smart student." Soi rasped as she nibbled at her earlobe, her tongue playing with the small earring like it would play with a cherry…or a nipple. "I know, however…I've always known you were a little bitch in heat underneath."_

_"Yes…" Sun-sun mumbled when Soi pushed her down with her entire weight and moved one of her hands up to caress her belly while the other cupped her between the legs._

_"I want to undo you. To make you lose that perfect little mask and expose you for what you are." She said as she began stroking her slowly, agonizingly, until her toes curled and trembled with tension. Her shirt was parted enough so that her lush breasts could be taken out, but not fully. She was breathing so quickly it hurt, and it felt like the buttons would burst any time now. Sun-sun tried to force Soi down on her, but her hands were roughly pushed away. Before she could register what was happening, they were tied above her head with her own tie. Soi then pushed against her, earning something between a moan and a whimper of desperation._

_"What was that?"_

_"Please…."_

_"Say it…" she hissed, the fingers on her softness becoming slightly more rigid than she thought they were._

Sun-sun's eyes opened abruptly, staring straight into the darkness. For a second, she thought it stared back. Then, realization hit her and she moaned loudly into her pillow with desperation.

It was late now, so late that even the stars outside didn't shine. A quick glance over at the clock told her that it was still too early to get up, but turning on the lights was like purposely invoking the laws of Murphy-namely, some neighbor with insomnia seeing them and getting the wrong idea. Sleep or lie in the dark, waiting for the dawn….what a choice!

Sun-sun wriggled out of the sheets and gasped, realizing how much the damned dream had affected her. She looked down at her body, both with disgust and despair with the situation it was slowly pushing her in. She didn't want her infatuation with her sensei to reach such lows, but the love she felt was more than she could handle. She carefully snuck out of bed to retrieve a head band from her bag (an item she had left Soi Fong borrow on one of their practices) before worming back between the sheets. With the item placed on her head, she inhaled the familiar scent of soap and orchids that seemed to be so characteristic of her sensei.

Her hands trembled as she pushed the nightshirt off and she rolled on her stomach. The sheets felt strange against her bare skin, but she ignored them and snuck her hands down her body. She reacted on whim, rubbing her breasts against the cold fabric while her fingers traced patterns just above her most private place. Reasoning that the faster she did it, the sooner it would be over, Sun-sun started moving her fingers up and down her slit, quickly, haphazardly, in a strange frenzy that made her skin burn with an incredible fever. Slowly, her mind blanked out as she screamed the name of her beloved into the night.

* * *

Soi Fong woke up, thinking that all her previous hangovers combined were nothing compared to this.

She'd been restless the whole night, sleeping short-lived cat-naps and constantly moving between the cold reality and the feverish dreams. And when she finally regained some sort of consciousness, she realized that she'd just made things a lot more difficult for herself than they had been before.

Somewhere catnap 5 and catnap 6 Byakuya had gotten out of bed, leaving her to wake up absolutely alone. Well, not like she would be any less alone if he had been there, Soi reasoned as she made her way towards the bathroom for a quick shower. They'd been so quiet and self-absorbed that she hadn't registered whether he had come of not. Judging by his lack of presence, he probably hadn't and was now cowering away.

It wasn't until she came out that she heard the knocking on her door. Wondering what had happened, she rushed to the door, tightening her bath robe around her frame.

"Good morning. Soi Fong-san?" the courier eyed her strangely, as if it was unbecoming for a woman to wave around in a bathrobe at this time of the day. She scoffed-well it was her damn place.

"Yes. What can I help you with?"

"I have a package for you." He said, offering her the clip-on to sign in and then handed her the order "I have orders to give back a response."

"A response?" she blinked, taking a small square box and a white envelope tucked into it. Inside, in perfect calligraphy, there was written:

_The nights of my life,_

_Have been cold and lonely,_

_Without light from you,_

_How deadly would it have been,_

_The sound of raindrops falling?_

Soi's cheeks flushed red at the implication. Realizing that the man was waiting, she retrieved a piece of paper from the kitchen and a pen and scribbled down, using what vague memory she had of her mother's lessons in Classic Japanese.

_Words cannot express,_

_In your tongue my feelings,_

_Had you only seen,_

_Wild geese carried by the wind,_

_You would have known them better._

Handing the man the note, she didn't wait for him to ask if she had anything to add before she hastily bid him good day and closed the door. Looking down at the package as if it was a poisonous snake, she carefully put it down on the kitchen table and tore it open. Inside, there was an elegant set of a sake bottle and two ceramic cups. A gift and waka-traditional offerings after a successful love night. She felt ill and had to sit down for a while before the world stopped spinning.

Both knew that this would lead to no end. Neither was particularly interested in a relationship, and she definitely didn't have what it took to please his family. Yet he still acted like a nobleman from the emperor's court, following all the traditions connected with mistresses. Did this mean he acknowledged her as such? Was she now his girlfriend? His fiancée? He'd decided to give her something to serve in, as a gift for the new home, but there were only two cups. Two, a pair, a set…and she would be reminded of how she got them forever.

Even if the man wasn't having serious intentions, he was taking this as seriously as any man would. Soi stared out in front of her-she would have to set some lines here.

What was even worse, she thought as she marched to the school, is that it didn't work. Her body last night had moved by memory, without ardor and commitment. The only thing that told her that something had happened was just a faint soreness. And perhaps a laziness that prevented her from getting any naughty images of her student, but that wouldn't take long.

Looking at the small group of people gathered up in front of the gym, and then down at the stack of plays she was carrying. Shakespeare…she hoped that it would be a better libido killer than Kuchiki Byakuya.

* * *

To her surprise, Kuchiki Rukia turned out to be a small, shy girl with short black hair and downcast eyes. She bowed politely to her and took her seat, not looking up even once, not even trying to look at Ichigo. The latter didn't let that cast him off because he sat himself right behind her and edged his chair as close as he could to hers without it looking too stalker-like.

Soi was rather surprised that Orihime didn't come. But then again, maybe the girl didn't want to hurt herself more by seeing the man she loved favor her rival in front of so many people. Strangely, she felt a little angry at her student-surely, he couldn't be that oblivious as not to notice how Inoue felt for him, yet he was still willing to pay attentions so openly to another that the entire school would know. Her eyes moved between the different faces in the group. She taught some of them, and some were from her own class…they all knew of Inoue's feelings, and now knew of Ichigo's…But the orange-head obviously didn't care for her reputation.

Glancing down at the list, Soi realized that Inoue had indeed signed up for the course, but she was nowhere in sight. The dainty woman frowned as she looked around again. Could it be that she would come anyway. She made a note not to put up "Midsummer Night's Dream", else somebody might mix the names up and then there would be a Hell to pay.

"Konbawa, minna-san!" a sweet voice chirped "Dekiagari desu ka?"

"Matsumoto-sensei…" Soi Fong frowned, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose "This workshop's purpose is to help the children with their English. Therefore, please refrain from using Japanese here."

"Oh, alright." The busty blond sighed "Hi, everyone. Are you ready?"

There were enthusiastic nods, and Soi sighed with relief upon seeing that Sun-sun was just as normal as she ever was. Maybe this day wouldn't be so horrible after all.

"Let's make a wonderful play together!" both teachers said, and Soi let out one of her rare smiles. _Reason sits firm and holds the reins, and she will not let the feelings burst away and hurry her to wild chasms. The passions may rage furiously, like true heathens, as they are; and the desires ma imagine all sorts of vain things; but judgment shall still have the last word in every argument, and the casting vote in every decision. Strong wind, earthquake-shock , and fire may pass by; but I shall follow the guiding of that still small voice which interprets and dictates everything._ (Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre, ch.19)

She would remain frozen…if not for her own good, then for the well-being of everyone she got involved in this. Including her Sun-sun.

* * *

At that time, on another part of the school, a knock was delivered on a door. A tall, lean man opened it and saw a young girl doubled over the ground, clutching at her shoulders furiously.

"May I come in?" she asked miserably

"I have nothing that amends a broken heart." He replied

"Can't you at least try to find one, for me?" she looked up, eyes filled with tears. He contemplated her for a moment, then reached out and put a hand over her shoulder.

"Take a seat." Finally came the reply.

The door shut, and with it, yet another circle was broken.

* * *

A/N-Sorry if the words in Japanese were not accurate. Please tell me if they are, so that I fix them.

Lili971-2, Il sera super si on discutera, parce que moi, meme si j'ai un B2 en Francais, je ne le parle tres bien. Mais je dois te demander de laisser ton courrier electronique la prochaine fois quand tu laisses un review, parce que je ne pouvais pas te repondre comme ca. Ou, si tu veux, te registrer dans pour utilizer le PM ici.

Suggestions, comments, requests, reviews...still waiting for them...T.T

I could say that...say, twenty reviews equals an update, but I can't make any promises because my muses are a pair of very capricious creatures and I'm on a diet...but still, any comments would do lovely on this lil' author.

Hope you enjoyed.


	10. Decisions, decisions

The course started off surprisingly well. There were no overdramatic attempts to catch the teachers' attentions and the children were surprisingly well-behaved…until the choice of play came and the goody-goody students lashed out claws and fangs and started a furious catfight that revolved around nearly every possible play they had seen in their lives, dragging their two teachers through a boxing-match-like discussion that took up most of their time.

After round 5 (or 50) they still hadn't decided. Their list included Shakespeare's "Romeo and Juliet", "Macbeth" and "Othello", Cunnigham's "Beautiful Bodies", Thompson's "Lion in the streets" and there was even some smartass that suggested "The vagina monologues". The latter was quickly overruled by the men as disgusting and the women as immoral. Personally, Soi didn't find anything embarrassing or immoral in Eve Ensler's work, but she was smart enough to know that the parents wouldn't like their daughters onstage reciting things like "I Was Twelve, My Mother Slapped Me" and "They beat the girl out of my boy". Quite frankly, in her state of mind, rehearsing with 18-year-old girls with no sexual experience "The Woman Who Liked To Make Vaginas Happy", and help them "demonstrate" a "mountain top moan" (for reference: aah…jaaaa…yoddlee-lee-yoddleEEE-hoo…) was quite frightening. Not to mention that the play was, if not homosexually-orientated, but it treated heterosexual sex like something akin to violence. No parent would approve of such things, even if it was just for a play.

But ignoring its more graphic sides, the play also touched a few very important subjects. Soi knew it for a fact that the majority of sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies originated from the people's ignorance of these subjects. Japanese considered that AIDS was solely reserved for foreigners and homosexuals. Things like teen pregnancies, domestic violence, oppression, homosexuality…they didn't talk about this. They were not ready for whatever may come. In her previous school, they preached abstinence until marriage because it was the only sure way for a person to protect themselves, but Soi was well aware that whether or not you would have sex was all up to you. Teenagers did it for a series of reasons, but they didn't have enough to abstain. And if they thought that there was just nothing that could save them, they figured that at least they would die happy.

In her case it had escalated into a disaster akin to "The Devil in Miss. Jones".

To her amusement, Sun-sun's account of Ichigo and Rukia's bumpy, hot-hate-cold relationship had been accurate to a fault. Rukia was delicate and dainty and held herself like a well-bred lady, but as soon as her hothead student provoked her, she leapt to her feet and spoke words that would never leave a lady's mouth.

"Why the hell should be do Macbeth, you stupid strawberry!"

"Baka! You think that Romeo and Juliet is better?"

"It is better. At least both male AND female characters get some limelight!"

"Yeah, if you call that pussy a male."

"Shut up, teme! You wouldn't know male if it bit you on the behind!"

"And thank God that'll never happen! Though I can't say the same for you-with that big mouth of yours, you're always asking for trouble."

**"!"**

On the other side of the room, the questions were between "Beautiful Bodies" and "The taming of the Shrew".

"How can you possibly put up that feminist play! Men are treated like rubbish, and they have no appearance whatsoever!"

"Yeah? And what about Shakespeare? An independent woman, born before her time, her will crushed by hunger and an oppressive husband, all for the sake of the pseudo-smart little sister! What kind of message does that give out?!"

Finally, Matsumoto-sensei had the amazing idea that they could pick a few plays and let everyone who wanted to act out a favorite part from them. Which was…well, compromising, well-accepted, and saved them a few more casualties, but Soi just couldn't forgive her buxom colleague for not coming up with this brilliant deduction earlier and not making the last hour of bloody fights, pseudo-feminist and semi-intelligent discussions.

"Alright then." She got up and glanced at her watch "That's all for today. I'll see you in Wednesday, and I expect you all to have chosen what you will do best. And Keigo-san…" she turned to one of her students with a cavity-sweet smile "If you are so taken with "The Vagina Monologues", I would suggest "They killed the girl in my boy" for you." After the required effect (Keigo blushing like a ripe tomato and his friends laughing), they all left.

* * *

Save for Sun-sun, of course. Her student was the last to get up and her first job wasn't to congratulate her on the successful lesson (like Matsumoto had), but hurried to put the chairs away and prepare the conductive strips on the floor. The only thing she said to her was that she would change in a minute.

For a second, Soi watched her student as she fussed around like a busy housewife, before heading to the dressing room, taking her bags with her.

Her shirt clung uncomfortably to her body, and they hadn't even started yet. She contemplated putting on all of that equipment and felt a heat attack coming up. Instead, she dug out a pair of shorts and a baggy T-shirt and put them on, before hurrying to the bathroom to adjust her hair.

Her reflection stared at her as she weaved her hands through her ebony locks. Really, was this her? She'd never been a beauty, but now she looked like a paper drawing of herself-flat and lifeless. Just like those girls from the course after a few years-they all talked big, but they would end up married and chained to the stove by their second year in college. Why did they even bother, when they didn't have it in them to oppose anything that is outside of their organized, safe world? She had a good idea that Aizen Momo was just that type.

Then again, she didn't have a spirit either. She never thought much about anything. She never saw her future, and now she realized how strangely this had affected her. Things had gotten hard for her in the US and she had moved to Japan. Her students were good and that sufficed. She was having sex with a colleague, but pursued no romantic involvement. She wasn't aiming for a successful career (there weren't many ways up anyways, other than getting a Ph.D. and writing textbooks), she wasn't aspiring to be someone's wife (although Kuchiki Byakuya wasn't so unattainable for her anymore), and she couldn't see herself ten years from now. Hell, she couldn't see herself five years from now!

She didn't live, she drifted.

It felt like the only moving force in her life were these strange dreams. Soi saw Sun-sun with the corner of her eye walk in the locker room and change. The reveries of this beautiful, innocent girl that drove her insane. Was this the only thing that ever moved her in this life?

"Sun-sun-san…" she called "There is no need for you to put the entire gear on today."

"Are you sure?" Sun-sun turned slowly, her violet eyes taking in her sensei's attire with surprise "Won't it be inappropriate?"

"It's just the two of us." Soi Fong let out a small smile "There's nothing for you to worry about."

* * *

The two walked out, warmed up and had a slow match to wake up their muscles. Then, Soi launched forward, completely unannounced, causing Sun-sun to stumble back and nearly fall on the ground. For a few seconds they stared at each other silently, then Sun-sun counter-attacked with a series of court, pointed blows, as if she aimed to break the defense. Slowly, she pushed Soi Fong towards the end of the strip, and slackened a little. That was all the invitation her sensei needed-in a flash, she knocked Sun-sun's foil away and had her fall on her ass again.

Their eyes locked-the ones of the woman and the girl. Different lives, different backgrounds, and yet they were so much alike!

"My apologies…" Sun-sun murmured finally "I got in over my head."

"A good observation." Soi replied "And what lesson did you learn?"

"Never let my guard down until I've won."

"Exactly. Especially when you feel you're winning. It's the most dangerous when your opponents are stepping back, because they might lash out on you at any moment. Pay more attention. Here…" Soi helped her on her feet "…keep a check on their eyes. They'll let you know they're planning something."

"Sometimes, it happens so fast I can't keep track of it." she replied

"Yes, that happens often. Look…" for the next thirty minutes they discussed tactic, until the door opened and Kuchiki Byakuya walked in.

Both teachers stiffened, and it didn't take Sun-sun long to realize that she should get out of their sight before something bad happened. She said that she needed some water and excused herself, leaving Soi Fong and Byakuya to stare at each other.

He was the first to break the silence:

"I didn't know that there was practice today."

"Practice is a big word. Sun-sun is the only one in the team who's not away on a trip. I asked her if she wanted to train more. She said yes." Soi replied calmly, although she could practically smell that there was something wrong. The waka from this morning came to her mind and she suppressed an urge to shudder. She had to ask him. She had to clear this mess up before something happened.

"Kuchiki-sensei, forgive me for not coming to see you earlier. I feel obliged to thank you personally for your…ehh…gift."

"You are welcome. However, I suppose that I should have consulted you earlier."

"What do you mean?"

"Your reply was very hasty. I thought my gift troubled you."

He thought she'd written that horrible waka because his gift was so awesome it had her speechless? Or brain dead, as this was the case. However, Soi caught onto the string and nodded stiffly. There was no need to tell him that the poem was so badly written because she couldn't do any better.

"I will keep this in mind. At present, I wonder if you would like to go and have lunch with me."

Or maybe not?

Cut this off. Clean break. Quickly!

"Kuchiki-san, I thought that you had business today."

"I do."

The silence settled between them. Whatever they could've said, it would've been sucked into the vacuum. What a paradox! Kuchiki Byakuya, despite being a teacher, was still one of the most eligible bachelors in Japan-handsome, intelligent, noble. Any woman would've wanted to be his wife. Hisana must've been something, Soi thought, to make this man fall in love with her and even make her his wife…she didn't know the details, but Uliquorra had told her she had been a commoner. His family definitely wouldn't have been happy.

Yes…Kuchiki Byakuya was an amazing man. He was definitely a lot better than that jackass of a fiancé she had in the States…so why was she so reluctant to accept any attentions from him? Surely, this was for the best. She could start her life anew, settle down, maybe have a few kids. If she got a ring and became a Mrs., she could finally feel safe. Kuchiki-san wasn't a bad man. Aiming for more of this relationship was natural.

But…

Whenever she saw him, everything around him was gray and lifeless. Dull. Boring. He wasn't a vicious man, but living with him would only give her a semblance of stability. It was history repeating itself. After all, she'd gotten engaged for the sole sake of comfort and stability.

And how did this end?

Exactly.

And she was running out of places to go to. China wasn't going to accept her so easily. For all she knew, the job market there was atrocious. And she hated to admit it, but Japan was starting to grow on her. She liked the well-mannered, disciplined students. She found the straight-laced schools a lot better than those who gave more 'freedom' in the US. She didn't want to leave…she was living comfortably already.

As soon as Sun-sun stepped in the room, she realized another reason existed for her not to accept Kuchiki Byakuya's advances. Although this romance was doomed from the start…although nothing good would come out of it…although this relationship extended to her dreams…

She couldn't betray her like this!

"My apologies, Kuchiki-sensei." Soi said, taking a step towards her student "But I have a lot of work today. Some other time."

"Naturally." He nodded, before drifting away.

"Sensei…." Sun-sun began, but Soi turned on her heel and entered the dressing room.

"Practice is over for today. Please clean up without me, I have something to do."

* * *

A/N-Sorry for the delay, everyone, and sorry it's so short. I'll try to amend myself in the next chappie.

**Rocky**, would you mind elaborating a little on 'pushing literature a bit too far'? I'm not sure that fanfics are considered literature yet, but if something bothers you so much you should be a little more specific.


	11. Your guardian angel

Today's song: Your guardian angel by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

Dedicated to Guy-With-Sunglasses: I hope your request is met accordingly.

* * *

The days dragged on slowly, whether because of the heat or boredom, Soi Fong couldn't tell. For students, summer went down the drain in seconds, but they had the good fortune to have an opportunity to go somewhere, as well as a great amount of time on their hands. Their teachers, on the other hand, could barely gather up a fortnight of free days per year, (Christmas and Easter included) and it often occurred that they wished they were better compensated for the time and nerve-wrecking they threw into the country's supposedly "brighter future".

Soi herself thought that if a country considered a generation of robotized, straight-laced bureaucrats a bright future, she would hand over her resignation immediately. However, it was the few, but wonderful students who promised to become, if not entirely free of the corset, then definitely not robotized. Really, why did society have to crush those that actually moved it forward. Children like Sun-sun, whose parents just loved to bully them around into the frame, really made her sad….Though in Sun-sun's case Soi was pretty much too involved to be acting like a hypocrite.

One week passed. There were on the whole three meetings of the drama club, five excellent fencing practices, lots of students who needed extra English classes to catch up, tons of homework to check and too many dreams for any of them to qualify. They talked, of course, but mostly about insignificant things, and Soi avoided staying too long with her, lest Sun-sun caught her watching. Soi didn't know whether she would react to this in any way, but it definitely wasn't a good idea to encourage her strangely horrible fantasies about her student. It all added up to an extreme amount of sexual frustration, and no matter how hard she tried to relieve it (with Byakuya or not), it was still there-like an annoying headache that just grows stronger by the day until it's impossible to ignore.

As for Byakuya, he came and went literally like a cat. His trips didn't have a pattern, although perhaps one week wouldn't be enough for one to settle, but for someone so organized he was extremely inconsistent. Sometimes he dropped by early, sometimes-in the middle of the night (he'd done both one time). She'd decided not to sleep on the rackety bed in order not to wake anyone up with the creaking of its strings, and usually waited for him in a futon spread on the floor.

In spite of how romantic the entire arrangement should've been, with them it just wasn't. Instead of waiting for him impatiently, like most new lovers did, she used the time until his arrival to correct essays or read a book. She didn't fuss about her hair, bother about an attire or check her make up every five minutes. She knew she was plain, often being mistaken for a boy by both teachers and classmates before (and sometimes even after) puberty hit her. Looks didn't bother her-Byakuya only sought her body as a source of relief to his natural desire to be with a woman, so why waste time and energy over something that wouldn't even be appreciated?

He'd acquired a key, so that he could come in and out without much trouble. A click. A door opening. She'd put the bookmark in or put a tick with a pencil to the place she'd been before putting the work aside. He'd slip in the room soundlessly, closing the door behind him and turning off the lamp. She'd pull the blinds halfway to let in some of the languid light from outside to let them see their way. He'd undress quietly, kneeling by the side of the futon. She'd pull the obi of her sleeping robes so that they could drop from her body. Wordlessly, they would move, constantly making way for each other in the too small bedding, re-arranging limbs, and just as wordlessly move until he came and gave out from underneath her.

Soi'd never ask for more than his silence. She didn't search the beauty of their shared warmth, of the little compliments, of the hidden gestures that meant so much. She didn't want to be anything more in this relationship for her own sake, nor did she ask for anything that would give her that tiny, but strangely beautiful pleasure of togetherness. She'd just keep her breathing shallow, her mouth shut closely, imagining that Byakuya's body was smaller, frailer, and softer than a feathered robe, while her teeth drew blood from the lips she'd been biting to keep herself from screaming the wrong name.

* * *

It was a simple arrangement. However, on Sunday night she got a call that made her understand that this was no longer acceptable.

"Sun-sun, can we talk?" her sensei called from the dressing rooms after their Monday fencing class. She spat some water and turned in the showers, wondering if she'd heard right. Soi Fong's face appeared on the doorway. "I need to discuss something with you." She elaborated.

Sun-sun smothered her hair back with her hands and nodded. That action seemed to be the only thing she was capable of since her teacher always seemed to make her lose her power of speech. Soi was still not dressed entirely, her hair hung in long, wet strands around her face, and her skin looked strangely rosy.

She hurried to finish with her shower and got into the locker room, toweling herself dry. To her surprise, her sensei waited for her to be completely ready before she motioned Sun-sun to follow her.

The problem was getting graver by the day. And like most young girls facing a love problem, Sun-sun often imagined a happy ending to it. Of course, in her case, being taken away on a white horse straight for a church was not a possibility, but she did hope that her feelings were reciprocated. Her imagination, which she'd considered quite fruitless, now fed with all those books and pictures was working at full speed. Her fantasies varied as follows:

The PG-15 rated version: The two of them are alone in a gigantic restaurant with a great view of the mountains (she was very partial of the solitude they offered). Sun-sun was sitting next to Soi while they gazed at the rich display of green, brown, golden and blue outside, when her beloved says that such a lovely scene can only take it's true form when you observed it with the right person (as much as Simone de Beauvoir it sounded). Sun-sun would then feel an incredible amount of courage and would tell her: "Sensei, I love you!" and she would reply "I love you too, Sun-chan." Fantasy ends with a strawberry flavored kiss.

The G rated version: They are in a rickety old shack (a lousy excuse for tourist shelter), hiding from a torrential downpour that had suddenly dropped on their heads while they were hiking. They would obviously be stuck in there for a while, and there were no chances of anyone coming to (supposedly) help them. Soi Fong would try to build up a fire with the few logs that are left there for the unlucky few who are stuck there, and would order her to lose all of her wet clothes before she caught a cold. Then Soi would do the same, and in order to preserve their body heat they would cuddle on the bed that is miraculously neat and soft. The cuddling, of course, would lead to other things, the most important of which would be that her sensei would make love to her in ways unimaginable to men while the fire roared higher and higher and the storm raged outside. Fantasy ends with an "I love you", whispered in one collected breath as they kiss after simultaneously reaching fulfillment and drifting off to sleep, lulled by the sound of their hearts beating.

The R rater version: They are in the teachers' room and the school is bristling with activity (though nobody comes in for some reason). Sun-sun is feeling hot, bothered and frustrated because her teacher continuously denies her something. However, she soon turns the tables on her because in the next moment Soi somehow ends up on a chair, her hands tied behind her back with one of Kuchiki-sensei's scarves, and Sun-sun is on her knees in front of her, pushing her legs apart. "Since I like you so much, I'll be nice." She tells her terrified teacher "But if you scream and draw attention to us, I'll be merciless." Then, with one swift motion, she undoes her pants, pulls them to her knees along with her panties and starts violently to lick and suck her. Soi is soon panting, sweating and reddening from excitement and fear. "Listen carefully, I'm busy here." Sun-sun tells her between licks. "You'll never get away with this!" Soi whispers, only causing Sun-sun to stop pleasuring her and looking up devilishly "Just for that…" she replies "I can leave you like this. But since I'm so nice, I'll give you a chance. What do you want?", "Untie me!" Soi whispers, but she moans when Sun-sun runs her fingers over her swollen clit "Wrong answer, sensei. Again." "Untie me!". Sun-sun just laughs darkly and licks her, this time agonizingly slow, until she's just ready to come. "Again. .?" She asks, and this time Soi gives in. "You, Sun-chan! I want you!" Fantasy ends with Soi shouting her love for Sun-sun for the entire world to hear and the two of them running out to a secret deserted island where they could fuck to their heart's desire and nobody would tell them anything.

Naturally, none of this happened. Soi led her to the classroom and told her to take a seat, while she leaned on her desk. Sun-sun looked at her teacher, while her expression became graver by the minute. What had happened?

For a split second she was afraid that she knew what was going on in her head, but then she said:

"Sun-sun, have you ever thought about the future?"

"Huh?" how intelligent, of course she had "Yes, I have."

Soi nodded. "And you've discussed this with your parents, no?"

"Yes." Partly.

"Perhaps you are wondering why I'm asking you this all of the sudden." Soi said, dropping from the desk and walking towards her. She pulled the chair from the neighboring desk and sat down, facing her student "You see, your father called yesterday."

"My…father?"

"Yes. You see he's very concerned about you and wishes that you are focused on your goals. You are aware that he wants you to enter Todai, and from there, the medical school." When she saw her nod, Soi went on "As you know, Todai is the most prestigious university in Japan, and medicine is easily the most responsible and hard thing that could fall on your shoulders. Naturally, your father wants you to keep your focus and he called me to ask that I talk to you as well."

"Am I not concentrated enough?"

"Do you not know your father?" Soi let out a small smile, causing Sun-sun to blush both with surprise and pleasure at the knowledge that she trusted her enough to be…less serious about it than she should "Sun-sun, I am not going to lie to you. Firstly, I want to ask you-since you've discussed this with your father and have probably thought it over a lot yourself, is this what you want?"

Was it what she wanted? Sun-sun opened her mouth to put out the facts, before she got to her own, private fiction: "As you said, medicine is one of the most noble and responsible sciences. Working as a doctor requires not just patience and cold-bloodedness, it asks for a great deal of willpower, something I am sure I possess. It is a job that will reward my work generously, and there is also the mental satisfaction of helping other people so directly." She took a deep breath "I will be honored with such a profession."

Soi gave her one look, and then breathed out: "But it isn't what you want." For a while, they were silent, before she asked her to explain. "It's simple. It will take a great effort to become a doctor, and when you do you are bound to feel satisfied and content. But it isn't what you wanted. You do not dream of going to Todai and studying to be a doctor. Or am I wrong?"

Sun-sun inclined her head on the side, wondering how to respond to this. And then she decided that since her teacher had trusted her enough to actually ask for her opinion instead of doing as her father bid, she deserved the truth. "No. I do not. But I have little choice."

"I beg to differ. You are a very smart girl, Sun-sun-san. You can excel in anything you do."

"I know that, sensei. I was referring to the fact that I am given very little choice, not that I cannot do anything but medicine. However, my father made it clear that I will either study medicine at Todai, or I will have to let Momo-san sign me up for an o-miai."

Soi blinked. "But I don't understand. If your father is willing to pay for such an expensive education, in Todai, no less, why should he not allow you to study any easier and less expensive subjects? Why choose between being a doctor or marrying?"

"That is a very complicated matter."

"I think I can follow through."

Sun-sun took a deep breath, wondering if she should cut her off or spill it out. When her father had first placed the decision in front of her, she'd felt hurt, manipulated and used, but she'd gathered herself up quickly and buried the insult deep within her. Now that she was asked to talk about it, she felt it rage within her again, and realized that she wouldn't be able to hold it back this time. Steeling herself, she began:

"As you probably guessed it, my father's greatest ambition in regard to his family is to have a son that would make a perfect hair. During the course of his first and second marriages, three such were produced, thus ensuring that he would have a boy to inherit his name and hopefully make it famous throughout Japan. However, in the course of making these sons several daughters were produced, thus encumbering him with the responsibility to provide for them until they reach a certain age. Now my father believes that we must all help our brothers in their journey upwards, so that when they do reach the top, we become useless. Father considers that a woman is meant to be a wife, and whomever does not suit the qualification must find a way to somehow keep out of everybody's path. He thinks that medicine is akin to a nunnery, and he's partly correct, as the full preparation would take up nearly as much time as my education so far has taken. Then, even if I do not go into intensive care, I will always have a busy schedule, no time for myself and I will be very likely to end up as an old maid."

She paused just long enough to take a breath before continuing: "As you can see his reasons are quite obvious. Also, as I am my brother's twin, I can get him into Todai where Father believe he will unleash all his hidden potential and become one of the most powerful people in the country. As much as I don't want to think that Luppi will probably blow his chances, I must deliver him to Todai and study to be a medic."

"Perhaps, if you marry…" Soi began slowly, reluctantly "Maybe your husband will be more open-minded. He could let you study something you want."

Sun-sun shook her head: "My father would hardly accept the offer of someone who is anything less than what he is himself. And besides, I have no desire to enter this matrimonial institution."

"Until you're ready?" Soi asked her student.

"Ever." She replied gravely "I do not believe that marriage makes us better or happier. It doesn't offer shelter, safety or protection. It only binds us by laws and forces us to stay together, even though we may truly be miserable."

"Are you…" Soi hesitated "So pessimistic because of your mother."

"My mother…" Sun-sun chuckled darkly "You don't know the half of it."

Soi moved to the edge of the chair and leaned in. "Tell me."

Tick-tack. Tick-tack. Time went on by. Or did it go back. She didn't know. It was so different, so strange. Her mouth felt dry, both from the proximity and the fear of what was about to happen. Her head hurt, as if she'd stayed in the sun for too long, and her body longed to go back underneath the shadow that her father cast. Why? Because she was afraid of Life? Of the heat of the sun, the blazing wind, the hardship and distress. Of the truth. Her father provided shelter from it. If she was good, she could stay in it forever.

But she was sick of being protected.

Sun-sun licked her lips slowly, composed herself and started speaking in a neutral, dead voice: "I am exactly one year older than Apache and one year younger than Mila-Rose. For four consecutive years, my father received five children from his wife, two of which were boys. However, all the childbirths and the immense pressure took their tool out of the woman and she revolted. There was a huge scandal. Everybody was screaming, and father once hit her. She ran off to the police and reported abuse, but father turned things against her. It ended with a divorce. Somehow, father made sure that she had no right to see us again and he soon brought our kindergarten teacher in home. He married her not two months later, and a little after more children were born."

She looked up and Soi was startled to see her eyes gleam dangerously "Father still has a detective following his first wife. He throws ever piece of dirt her finds at his lawyer who pulls another restriction from the court. The woman that gave birth to me now lives in Spain, and has wed another woman. I only heard this because I listened on one of his conversation with his lawyer, but I knew who they were talking about immediately. And I wonder…how can anyone want to be married? To be legally enslaved to another person, and when you try to break free, they take away every last bit of your self-respect, every bit of your life. She was not even allowed to finish nursing Tesla, for God's sake! And now she's not allowed to come into contact with us, and we-to call Tia Halibel our mother, because the court finds her unfit and dangerous." She shook her head "I'm eighteen years old. I'm legally old enough to vote, drive and marry, and yet I don't feel any more mature than when I was twelve. And now that I'm legally allowed to have an opinion, I really think that I would've wanted my MOTHER, my real birth mother to be with me, lesbian or not!"

And that was it. The string broke. Sun-sun could practically hear branches cracking above her, sending a torrent of pine needles on her head while the rays of the sun shun hotly over her head, blinding her with their dazzling light. Tears fell from her eyes, whether from pain or relief that she got all of it out, but they were there and she was here and she had finally, finally said it! However wrong it was, she was not one bit sorry for it.

There was a weight on her shoulder and she blinked a few times, before recognizing her sensei's beautiful face and her kind smile. One of her hands was squeezing her shoulder comfortingly while the other offered her a handkerchief. While Sun-sun muttered her apologies and asked her to forgive her due to the fact that it was too hot in the room, Soi continued to smile at her and offer support until she was composed enough to go home.

While the two walked towards the door of the school, Sun-sun looked up and let the hot rays of the sun caress her face. It felt wonderful.

"Sun-sun, I won't tell your father what you said and how you feel." Soi told her "However, keeping this kind of emotion at bay is impossible and if you don't vent it out, it will eventually burst and it will not do you any good."

"Yes." She nodded.

"If you need anything, you can speak to me about it, alright?"

Sun-sun only let out an ephemerae smile, before opening her mouth:

"I will. Thank you for today, and I…." she took a deep breath and sighed with defeat "Goodbye, sensei."

Soi nodded and she turned to leave. "Goodbye, Sun-sun."

_I love you too_, she added in her mind, before heading home. She had a favor to call.

* * *

A/N-Thanks for the reviews, and I hope that this chapter has been better than the last. Say, which one of Sun-chan's fantasies did you wish to come true? For future reference.

Reviews don't always have to be nice. Requests, suggestions, critics, I'm still waiting for them. What would you like to read? I can't fulfill your expectations unless I know them. Now I'll lace up my tourist shoes and I'll climb some mountains, and by next week I'll be back, hopefully, with better ideas than now.

Au revoir.

Ah, yes-for poetry-my account on Fictionpress can be found through the webpage adress on my profile. Enjoy


	12. Unwritten

She glanced at the calendar angrily, as if it was the source of her problems and she could make them go away just by glaring at it. She closed her eyes, counted to ten and looked down between her legs again. Nope. The universe still hated her.

Sun-sun sighed and pulled her towel around her body again. The little afternoon shower had done little to satisfy her from the latest tête-à-tête with her teacher, but at least it had cooled her body enough for her to feel like her normal self again. She had homework and chores to attend to, and the daily phone call to her father to report, although Kami only knew that she couldn't tell him anything of what happened to her in reality. Her period going missing without trace was probably her smallest transgression on the unwritten family laws since the start of the school year.

Luckily, she didn't have to worry about being pregnant (unless masturbating like crazy over perverted dreams could get you knocked up now). She hadn't really noticed she was late until she'd looked the date up today, but there really wasn't anything that could remind her of it, or made her feel its importance. Quite frankly, to her the menstrual cycle was just an annoying bodily function, albeit a very painful one. She could do without it, but if Momo found out (and she was sure that she would), it would cause an unnecessary amount of trouble.

Alright, she sighed inwardly. She'd tell her father she's not feeling well and ask him to call the family doctor and arrange for a check-up. He wouldn't ask and she would just take the pills the doctor gave her, forcing her body to become normal, just like her father had forced her mind to become as straight-laced as it was.

Sun-sun quickly went over her list for the day, taking care of the little everyday tasks, throwing her clothes into the washing machine, taking out the trash, watered the plants and had small talk with the neighbors. The windows needed a wash, but she guessed that she could to that tomorrow morning. All the better to prove to whatever spy her father had hired to keep an eye on her that she had no life.

However, as she walked back into the door and closed the door behind herself, she felt a familiar weight settling in her stomach. She frowned slightly, staring at the bright afternoon light as if it was her eternal nemesis. She could sit down and read, but she knew that the words would soon blur and lose their meaning as a particular itch would get stronger and stronger. But her antics were usually reserved for the wee hours of the night, when there weren't people to hear her (at least, who would care).

"Sun-sun, I would like to have a word with you…in private." Kami, just remembering her voice had her panting for air. That said, a proverbial Pandora's box sprung open, releasing a herd of nightmarish fantasies, varying from the cheesiest of scenarios to the worse BDSM acts Sun-sun had looked over in the yuri comics. Her skin sizzled underneath the thin fabric of her dress, so much that she actually thought that her clothes might burn on her flesh, scarring her for life. Painfully slowly, she walked to the window and glanced out at the street. There were some children playing, but there was a good distance between them and the house, compliments to the front yard. No neighbors in sight either, although there never were. Luckily, her bed was not under the window and anyone who saw her would either have to climb on the rooftop of some nearby building, or walk straight into her room. Either way, she reasoned as she lay on her bed, pulling down the zipper of her dress and kicking it off, if they see anything, they wouldn't say anything, unless they want to admit doing something that isn't their business.

Her undergarments followed suit and she quickly slipped into one of her favorite fantasies that included Soi Fong, herself and a very, very crowded beach.

She was feeling so hot it was a miracle she hadn't spontaneously combusted. Was this a beach or a desert, damn it! It was decidedly different from the other times, the urgency, fear and power made it feel more like a fever than lustful haze. Sun-sun could feel the sand with every fiber and sense of her body. It was literally everywhere, engulfing her, swallowing her, and despite herself, she felt panic rising in her chest.

Nevertheless, the pleasure was also building up, and with every passing second she felt more and more desperate. It was becoming difficult to breathe, but she was close, so very close. Please, please, she begged, please, let this be over with. It was torture. An impossibly sweet one, but incredibly trying for her lungs.

Her hand thrust one more time and her back arched painfully as she came, as every muscle in her body tensed until it felt like she would break if she moved.

She crashed heavily on the sheets, her hair falling messily around her. Her lungs felt like they would explode as she took in greedily gulps of air and blinked in an attempt to chase away the black spots dancing in front of her. She listened carefully, but no sound came from the outside, al least not something out of the ordinary. Safe once again, she thought, letting her head rest on the side and her eyes locked with a pair that stared at her from the door.

Her heart jumped into her throat and literally forgot to beat for an entire minute. Then, to her surprise, she let out a yelp, jumped into a sitting position and grabbed the bed sheets to cover herself up. It didn't really help that the person at the door didn't even blink in response to her antics, and it wasn't until she regained her senses did she realize that it was actually her brother.

"Tesla…" she croaked, her chest rising and falling rapidly as her heart slowly came to life "What are you doing here?"

The boy finally moved from leaning in the doorway by stepping into the room. Sun-sun became vaguely aware that he was carrying a sack over his shoulder and he was still wearing his traveling clothes. Maybe he hadn't seen anything either. "Father sent me home early. He said that if I'm not enjoying myself, I should not ruin the vacation for the others."

"Oh…" She trailed off as she became vaguely aware that she was still clutching the sheet to her chest, but it did little to hide her. Carefully, she wrapped it around herself and got up "You're probably hungry, I'll go warm some dinner for you."

"That's alright, you should take your shower first." He responded and when he saw her expression, added "You were about to take a shower, right? That's why you're undressed."

"Yes….yes, that's right." She nodded and retreated into the bathroom with as much dignity as the situation allowed her to.

* * *

"_Of course I should have called to warn you about this…"_ her father explained when, later that evening, she called him to report Tesla's safe arrival _"But my phone was out cold and I knew that you would be busy fencing at school so I decided that I should not interrupt you."_

"That is alright." Sun-sun replied, although she was feeling quite far from fine. Tesla was currently busy sipping his ramen, but she was still feeling the intensity of his stare when he had seen her. Most men would have turned away, blushing, sometimes screaming, and yet Tesla had just stood there, staring at her. Even she could tell it was not right, and it freaked her out! "How does the trip go for everyone else?"

"_Fantastic. Your brothers and sisters are enjoying themselves to the fullest."_ Her father's buttery sweet voice spilled over her _"Tesla, however, seemed to get bored and we decided that it would be for the best to send him back, lest he does not fatigu himself."_

"That is a good idea." She mumbled

"_Tomorrow, you are not busy, aren't you? Why not take your brother out a little? Go to the park, read underneath the trees for a few hours, relax. You've been working so hard these two weeks, Sun-sun, I'm getting worried whether you are having a good time or not."_

"I am perfectly well, father." She said "But if you wish, I will take Tesla out. However, I am afraid that I will have to leave him alone on weekdays. He will not find any pleasure in my fencing or drama club."

"_Well, he always carries his sketchbook around, why don't you leave him off with the arts club? They have sessions in the summer, right? I'm sure that he'll find a way to fill him time there." _

It was on the tip of her tongue to say that Nnoitra-sensei's classes were not as light and easy as her father made them seem. In fact, if they had to compare art class to fencing, children preferred the fencing because Kuchiki-sensei's cold indifference was nothing to Nnoitra's loud and destructive mood swings. Their teacher was so scary that the corridors became as quiet as a tomb when he walked by, and Sun-sun wasn't entirely sure that Tesla needed to spend more time with that violent maniac than he needed to.

Naturally, that didn't come out.

"I will ask him. If per chance he does not want to, I think I can make him revise his Chinese lessons while I am busy."

_"He_ will _want to."_ Aizen said _"Thank you, Sun-sun."_

"Have fun." She replied, but he had already hung up

* * *

How could she put up with this, she thought when the next day, armed with books and pencils, she and Tesla walked towards the nearby park. Never before had she felt the weight of her father's shadow so strongly upon her, so very suffocating and sickening. Now, after she'd told her sensei about her mother, she felt strangely aware of how much he'd squashed her and molded her personality until it fit his idea of normal. It felt like she'd torn off a veil that had prevented her from seeing, from feeling correctly. Somebody had a theory about that, although she could not remember who.

They settled underneath a sakura tree that had long lost his lovely pink petals, and now cast a thick shadow over the grass. Tesla pulled out his sketchbook and sat with his back to Sun-sun, who, in return, took out one of her textbooks and a new notebook, leaned back on the trunk and tried focusing on her read.

However, her thoughts kept drifting away from her occupation and returned to her brother. What would make their father send him back after only two weeks? She wouldn't have been surprised if it was Apache or even Luppi-those two were bound to get into trouble no matter where they went. But Tesla? He was so quiet people hardly registered his presence, why would their father even notice he was bored. Why would he care? As long as he put up an appearance, there wouldn't be any trouble, wouldn't it?

Sighing, she put her book away. What could've possibly happened there? Usually their father was so calm, he was perfectly fine unless a scandal arouse. Did Tesla really do something that bad?

Well, she wasn't finding out anyway because he refused to speak to her. Not that she expected anything else from him, but luckily she didn't feel intimidated or tensed around him either. Tesla was just…Tesla. Sometimes, he was a presence, sometimes he just blended with the woodwork until he disappeared. Sometimes, she thought that her family was divided into groups: The loud Aizens, the ones that always said their opinion and made a mess, like Mila-Rose, Luppi, Apache, Loli and Menoly. There were the quiet ones the blended into the woodwork, like Wonderwice, Tesla and herself. And then there was her father, who was both sometimes, and Momo, who was neither. Halibel didn't even make the equation-every trace of her had been thoroughly erased, every reminder of her-destroyed.

For fourteen years of marriage her father and Momo had produced three children, and whenever she looked at them, Sun-sun felt like something had gone terribly wrong. In Biology, Unohana-sensei told them about anatomy, explained every function of the human body, and then talked of hybridization, Darwin, alleles and gametes. She talked about genetic illness and once she had explained that for some individuals, being homosexual was in their blood, and they could do nothing about it. Now that she sat there, completely undisturbed, looking up at the rays of the sun through the leaves of the tree, she couldn't help but let her thoughts drift.

_We are our parents_, Sun-sun said to herself, _equal parts of a man and a woman._ However, when one part is dominant, you earn for the other. So is it really so wrong when you do not love men? That you do not feel a desire for them to complete you? Or, moreover, you want to break the balance even more? If that was so, then what were Loli, Menoly and Wonderwice? When Momo was nothing and her father was everything? Once again Sun-sun thought about Halibel and felt a pang in her heart. _Lesbian or not, she created me. I would not rather be like these mismatched creatures my father calls perfect children. That is what I want! _

If Mila-Rose broke free when she first encountered love, then she could as well. Resolute, Sun-sun slammed her notebook open and started writing.

* * *

Soi checked the mail for the umpteenth time this day and, finding it as empty as ever, gritted her teeth and slammed her fist into her pillow with annoyance. It was two days, damn it, wasn't express courier supposed to work fast? She'd put on all the right stamps, damn it, and filed all the right papers. And she'd made sure her letter was all according to etiquette, so why was there no answer? Of course, she'd asked for a written response, but Yoruichi had her e-mail-she could send a notice that they've gotten her parcel, at least.

Maybe it was the letter, she thought, maybe it was too much according to etiquette. Shihoin Yoruichi had never been the one for formality, but after that grandiose scandal she'd thrown her, Soi felt that some respect and humbleness was in order. But still, two days and no response…those idiots from the company had better delivered that parcel, or else she was going to sue them for everything they had!

Today she felt like everything was going wrong. First the drama course had started off badly because half the people were too lazy to get out of bed, caught the wrong bus or just didn't feel like it. Even Matsumoto-sensei called to tell her she was down with a mysterious illness (read: hangover), and Sun-sun said that she would come straight for fencing, she had something to discuss with Nnoitra-sensei.

It was too much. Too hot, too stuffy, too boring, too uniform. She felt an urge to scream, to run, to lie down and completely fade out of existence, but the fact that she would probably be monitored by the school authorities until the end of the year meant that she couldn't permit herself to take a long break, or be on sick leave for too long. _It's all worth it,_ Soi told herself, _this is my home now. I'll put up with it for another few months and then I'll be free to build up a life. There is no need to let strange desires jeopardize it. _

But hadn't she jeopardized it already by sending the letter to Yoruichi-san? Although she'd known that her childhood mentor had married a woman in Spain, she hadn't imagined that it would be the mother of someone she knew, until she heard the name and made the necessary connection. When the Shihoin princess had written to her to tell her of this, Soi had left the letter unopened, just like she'd started doing when Yoruichi's correspondence became more than she could bear. She had to admit, the relationship she had with the Goddess was something she hadn't been particularly easy with over the years, but now the times called for a change.

Not like they were what one would typically refer to as 'friends'. Soi's father was the first assistant of the head of Shihoin Inc., Yoruichi's father, and the two girls encountered each other on the numerous public events that the company organized. Events that both attended to help their parents maintain a public appearance, events that they both hated. As it turned out, it was the only thing they had in common.

However, that didn't prevent the Shihoin Princess to take a liking to her younger sidekick and soon started seeking her, ignoring completely the other play dates arranged for her. Soi's parents often told her that she was very lucky to be so well singled out and practically melted into smiles when Yoruichi came to 'visit', in her giant limo, accompanied by an army of governesses and nannies, and while Soi herself didn't realize what being singled out mean at the time, she understood that she'd be in big trouble if she denied the Goddess anything and went along everything she said.

The games changed as the two grew older, but the servant-ruler status between them never changed. That, along with the fact that despite all her stunts, Yoruichi always came to her in the end, were the things that remained constant throughout the years. Soi worked hard to remain on top of her class, Yoruichi excelled at everything without even breaking a sweat; Soi had to keep a long list of academic achievements to get into college, Yoruichi only needed her name; and while the Chinese girl had little to no friends and shrank further back into the shell, the Goddess became more and more rebellious and exuberant with each passing day.

It wasn't like Soi Fong disapproved of Yoruichi or found her unpleasant company. She didn't really have a choice in it, but if she had to be entirely honest, it was the Shihoin princess that brought a fresh breath of air into her stuffy life and prevented her from turning into a total robot, but she daren't think that she did her the same favor. Yoruichi was always so beautiful, so perfect, that Soi couldn't help feeling a little envious of her. But there were some pretty weird moments of their relationship, starting with a rather disturbing game of tag to a series of letters Soi suspected that her friend wrote while under the influence of alcoholic/illegal substances/both.

Currently, their relationship was far from rosy. The last time they'd seen each other in the flesh had been the day Soi left for college and Yoruichi had definitely been drunk when she'd come that time, because she'd spoken about lusting after her ever since she was six and had made a grandiose scandal about her denying a Shihoin, to what Soi had responded with an uncharacteristic burst of passion, throwing a broom at Yoruichi and screaming back a dozen things she wished she hadn't screamed.

And now, by some evil twist of circumstances, she needed to call and apologize. Soi hadn't wanted to be the one to give up, but she had taken up enough risks as it was. _I am a free woman_, Soi reasoned, _even if I do get found out, I am not restricted from contacting my friend, even though she is connected to someone who is not allowed to even visit or call her children. _

Now she could only sit down and wait for Tia…er, Shihoin Halibel to decide whether she deserved an answer.

* * *

That night she was so preoccupied wondering how would Yoruichi react to the letter that she actually missed Byakuya walking into the apartment and came to her senses with a start when he decided to sit down next to her on the bed.

"I apologize for startling you." He said when she recovered from the momentarily shock "I did not realize you were lost in thought."

"That's alright…" she replied, a little stiffly "It's my fault."

He nodded, although his eyes were still apprehensive "Are you feeling well? It is very unlike you not to pay attention to the outside world." Smooth bastard, Soi thought, ask her if she's not going nuts without insulting her and losing his roll in the hay for the night "Are you…indisposed?"

"Not indisposed." She explained "Just…a little tired from the long day."

"Can I get you anything? Tea? Wine maybe?" Byakuya offered

"No, that won't be necessary…Unless, of course, you would want something to drink?"

"Tea would be nice." He nodded and watched her pat away to the kitchen "Are your students causing you trouble, Soi Fong-san?"

"They are very much in their customary summer mood, Kuchiki-san. You can hardly blame them from skipping school. The only ones that came were actually your sister and Kurosaki, and we couldn't do much with them safe a little practice for Othello."

"If they have taken on an engagement, they should not seek how to get out of it, but carry it out to the end." He replied and, as if an unpleasant thought crossed him, his face became strangely cold and distant "Tell me, how did Rukia and that Kurosaki boy end up together for the play?"

"They picked the same play and act from which to play scenes and Matsumoto-sensei and I decided that it wouldn't be too bad if we gave them a scene to do together. You see lots of students wanted to be leads and we couldn't do all those plays so we decided to do snippets. But since there are many snippets, most of which are violent monologues, we still end up with a very long program."

"It has come to my attention that those two did not get along on the winter camp last year." Byakuya said as he sat down on a chair in her kitchen and accepted the cup she offered him "Is their relationship better now?"

"No, they seem to disagree about nearly every word that leaves their mouths. However, it works for the play, and they never resort to violence or ugly scenes. You may rest assured, Kuchiki-san, your sister takes the project very seriously, and where even her teacher falters, she is there to help." She said with a little annoyance over her colleague's lack of focus on the job. Byakuya seemed to understand that and nodded compassionately, although his mind was elsewhere.

"Soi Fong-san…have you ever considered what you will do later on?"

"No. Why?"

He gave her a weird look. "Never mind. If Rukia gives you any trouble, tell me."

The two regarded each other quietly for some time, before she set down her empty cup and got on her feet. It was impossible for her to fully concentrate on anything tonight and when she was in such a state, she was best left alone, therefore she had to find a way to remove Byakuya from her apartment. There really was no easy way out of it, but she still wished that she managed through without hurting his pride. "I apologize, Kuchiki-san, I am not feeling well tonight."

"Of course." He nodded and got up "Although I should be the one apologizing."

"Kuchiki-san…" she began, a little taken aback by his easygoing attitude

"No, please." The nobleman put a hand up, demanding her silence "We have not been in this sort of relationship for more than a couple of weeks, it is not correct of me to have any demands on you. What is more, its nature was not made very clear and I believe that you are not bound to me in any way. It was inconsiderate of me, and I offer you my apologies."

"We are both tired today. Should we leave and say nothing of it then?"

"Of course." He nodded. Just as she was about to see him out, the telephone rang, making them both start. "Are you expecting a call?"

Without a word, she dashed towards the phone and picked it up, mumbling a quick 'Hello, Fong speaking', before her shoulders dropped with exasperation and she leaned on the wall for support. "What can I do for you, Uliquorra sen…When?...Why are you calling me?...Alright, I'll be right there." Unphased by the fact that Byakuya was still in the house, she took off her sleeping robes and put on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, not even bothering with the underwear. In response to his quizzical stare, she said:

"Something happened to Inoue, I have to get to Tokyo General immediately."

"Then I will take you there." He offered, not skipping a beat.

* * *

Neither spoke during the drive. Uliquorra hadn't said much, leaving Soi wonder how had Orihime ended up in the hospital, and, more importantly, why was her presence requested so urgently? Alright, so the girl hadn't shown up on any of the drama classes, but…surely, she hadn't been doing something to herself these last two weeks now, could she? She still would have to show up for cooking class now and then, right? Or maybe her brother decided to take her on a trip earlier than planned? Anything could've happened….

Byakuya was pretty much into his own little world, although when he left her in front of the hospital he did look a little phased out.

"Soi Fong-sensei!" Uliquorra greeted her almost at the door and led her towards Orihime's room, and it really took one glance at him to realize that things were dead serious. Not like his voice on the phone hadn't been serious enough, but he looked absolutely preposterous. His shirt was buttoned wrong, his hair was messy and instead of shoes he was wearing a pair of flip-flops. Never had she seen the doctor in such a state of distress, and if that hadn't been enough, Inoue Sora was enough to convince her entirely.

The person she saw was a far cry from the cheerful, easy-going young man she'd met a few months ago. He was pale, wide-eyed, face twisted with worry and grief. Looming over him was a tall man with black clothes, whose calm posture was in such sharp contrast with the other two's anxiety that Soi immediately felt intimidated by him.

When Uliquorra brought her over, her suspicions confirmed-Sora barely gave her a nod, before burying his face into his hands again, while the stranger eyed her from head to toe while they shook hands. "My name is Stark. I'm an officer from the Child care and Family relations division. Pleased to meet you."

Officer? As in police officer? Soi glanced briefly at Uliquorra, as if the man's face could, for once, tell her what happened, but even now his mask was still in place. Turning towards Stark fully, she put on her best calm look, while eyeing him in her turn. He was rather handsome, in his own messy way. His hair was left long, but his beard was well-groomed; his clothes were wrinkled, but they were the best quality nonetheless; and while at first his posture appeared a little too leisurely, his eyes were bright and attentive.

"You are a measuring me, sensei." He said, a little mockingly as he looked down on her "Am I this scary?"

"I am just trying to understand the situation better, Stark-san. As far as I know, Inoue Orihime has fallen ill, but I neither know how, of what, why Uliquorra-san has called me out here or why your presence was required."

"And you are rather displeased that your rest was interrupted because of this matter, are you not?"

"That is not possible, Stark-san. For me to be pleased or displeased or even slightly concerned would imply that I have more insight on the situation. So why not stop beating about the bush and tell me what's going on here?"

Stark frowned slightly, eyes going between Inoue Sora and Uliquorra. "I suppose he didn't have time to explain." Looking back at her, he began "Earlier today, Inoue Orihime was brought in after she suffered a fall and broke her arm. Naturally, her brother was called for, but the doctors here noticed that she was severely malnutritioned, and suspicion arouse. Hence my being here." He paused enough to take a seat and gesturing her to do the same.

However, she remained standing, looking between him and Sora pensively. "You are trying to determine whether Orihime was suffering abuse at the hands of Inoue Sora-san?"

"That is correct, sensei."

"Has it not occurred to you to ask Orihime herself what happened?"

"We tried." Uliquorra intervened "All of us did. We asked, coaxed, begged her to speak, but she doesn't utter a word. Stark-san arranged for her to be taken to a room for the night so that she could recover from the shock, but I don't think that rest is the solution here."

"Uliquorra-sensei believes that Orihime-san can speak now, but chooses not to." Stark elaborated "However, at this point, the reason for her silence is rather irrelevant. Sora-san says that he knows nothing of her not eating, but as you can imagine, I cannot take his word for granted. Uliquorra-san was summoned because he was supposed to do a physical check-up on her one month ago, and he suggested we call you because the girl spent a lot of time in your company. Even for a short time, you have been her teacher, and he believes that you can account for her character better than anyone."

"Is that so?" she threw Uliquorra a sour glance before turning her eyes back on Stark. "Is an account of her character the only thing you will need, or I should deduce what caused this?"

"Assumptions do me no good, sensei." Stark explained, a neutral expression settling across his features "However, whatever facts you can provide that would help us understand what happened would be welcome."

Soi frowned. The notion that Sora was at fault was ridiculous, of course-even after she'd seen him once, the young man had struck her as a decent, loving brother. His expressions and address held no malice or viciousness, unlike Aizen Sosuke, whose friendly façade covered a cruel soul. If Orihime indeed had stopped eating, it had probably been her doing and Sora's only sin was that he hadn't noticed. However, why she would do this was another question…Orihime was a wonderful, albeit clumsy girl, and while she spoke of aliens in English class, she was sweet and amiable and had enough self-esteem to be who she was. Unless…Soi closed her eyes, her brow creasing as she tried to find a better excuse for her behavior, but she didn't.

How could she, when there was none?

Stark misinterpreted her silence for stubbornness and said: "Soi Fong-san, I am only doing my job here. Right now, silence helps no-one and we may be wasting precious time here. If she is in danger, I would protect her, as should you, being her teacher, without changing the objectivity of your opinion over…" he glanced at Inoue Sora "Personal sentiments."

Good God, he thinks we're lovers! Sometimes, she really missed out being engaged, people here heard she was single and automatically assumed that she was screwing around! The idiocy of this made her sick, but she handled it quite masterfully.

"I understand that, Stark-san. However, I was not silent because I felt like I should. I cannot tell you what she thinks, or what her brother did. However, as far as I know him, I've gotten the impression that he is a gentle person, unable to harm anyone willingly, and I doubt that he was aware Orihime wasn't eating. As for the girl herself, she is very lively, very care-free, very brave and original. She speaks her mind, even though it's a strange one, and her classmates like her. Nobody has bullied her, as far as I know, and she generally gives the impression of a person who enjoys life. I won't hide that this news surprises me, but…"

"You can't say that you didn't expect something to happen either, right?"

"I'm not sure. The last time I talked to her, she was a little melancholic, and she signed up for a drama club she never attended…" Soi began, but then Inoue Sora suddenly looked up.

"The drama club? She hasn't come?"

"No. Did she tell you she was coming?"

"Yes. Every time they had a meeting, I'm sure she went!" he exclaimed "You mean she never showed up?"

Shaking her head, Soi turned towards Stark. "I cannot say with absolute certitude what pushed her into this, but I've seen enough lovesick teenagers to recognize the signs. I think she might have been trying to become the girl a certain boy would've liked, but I cannot imagine how, or why she did it. I'm sorry."

The man studied her for a long time, carefully measuring her words and seeking for any grain of lies in them. Upon finding none, he nodded slowly. "Then that is all." Getting up, he offered her his hand again "I apologize for the inconvenience, Soi Fong-san. I will continue to look this up, but so far your version seems reasonable."

"I wish I could offer more help, but I can't." she replied evenly

"Perhaps when she calms down, you may talk to her." Stark said "It may all be the shock, but if she keeps this up, she might need some help, and I think a person she knows would be better than a psychologist."

"I will." Slowly pulling away, she turned towards Uliquorra and Inoue Sora. "I'll be going then."

"Thank you for your help." Both said, Sora-san getting on his feet and bowing to her. As Soi prepared to leave, she heard Stark call after her and turned around to see the man approaching her quickly, while pulling out a card from his pocket

"In case you remember anything, or you encounter something that you believe needs investigating." He replied, before bowing once again and bidding her good night. Soi did the same, and wrapped the card carefully in a handkerchief, putting it back into her pocket. At this point she had no evidence to prove it, but if she did, she knew a family that needed a serious reality check.

* * *

A/N-Did somebody say Stark?

Sorry, folks, updates will not be made until the end of the month, on acconunt of the fact that the author goes to a place with no electricity (no, I'm not dying). On an even more depressing note, I was so depressed lately I wrote a requiem to my childhood. For that, go to my profile, go to my webside and take the hyperlink to my fictionpress profile. That is, if you're up to it.

On a happier note...SUMMER!


	13. Never had a dream come true

* * *

She never had the feeling like she wanted to write anything in her life, other than the snooze-fest assignments for school and an occasional e-mail, and neither of those needed any experience or special vocabulary. But since her brother had come, and she couldn't risk getting caught again doing…that, she was compelled to write, as a vent for all the frustration and thoughts that passed through her head, as a way to keep her hormone-overloaded mind from frying. Suddenly, Sun-sun found herself at loss of words to express what she wanted to express.

Never before had she been in the possession of a journal. Or one of those cheap diaries with tin locks that had the same keys. It wasn't some sort of paranoia that she would be spied on by Momo or her father, which actually wasn't that improbable, but she couldn't get over the fact that she would be writing her uttermost thoughts on a piece of paper. But this was neither a diary, nor a journal. No. She wrote them as homework for French class, as letters…but they were always directed, somehow, towards her sensei.

In spite of swapping names and events, they were all directed towards her. If anyone who knew them well enough read this, they would know, but she didn't count on letting any one of those few have this notebook. She didn't even know if she would even give it to her sensei, but maybe she would. Maybe, if she gathered up the guts to do so.

Strangely enough, she found herself more and more reaching for a dictionary. Not because her French wasn't fluent enough (actually, it wasn't, but she fancied herself good enough), but because she found herself more and more at loss. No matter what she wrote, she couldn't believe that those simple, mortal words written on that burnable piece of paper could actually give the Reader (the hypothetical one, as well as the Reader in general) an idea of the importance these words held for her. She didn't even know if she should keep the notebook at home, but she could keep it in her locker at school…or something like that.

Meanwhile, Tesla had turned one of the terraces into an atelier of some sorts. Apparently, it had taken him two classes with Nnoitra-sensei for him to get inspired into drawing. And did he draw! Sun-sun took his meals up on the terrace and each time she saw a new sketch being made or an aquarelle drying in the corner. She hurried to leave, though, because every time she walked into his small domain, Tesla ceased all activity and stared at her, long and unblinking, for minutes at a time, as if he'd forgotten to breathe, a pencil or a dripping brush in hand. It felt like she was intruding into his own little world.

At school, she didn't hang around for long around the art class. The summer courses were, as she liked to say, a magnet for stereotypes. Like the drama class (with a few notable exceptions), was the home of prima donnas and over active aspiring starlets, the writing class brought together suicidal Goths, and the arts class-the anti-social, closed up kids that struggled for acceptance. Tesla sort of fitted into that last group, but Sun-sun had never been more surprised when, at Friday, she brought her brother to the classroom and actually saw Nnoitra-sensei come to the door and practically rip his student's portfolio from his hands to look over the pictures within.

"It's nice to have a hobby." Soi Fong noted when she told her of this occurrence "Tesla always doodles on the backs of his notebooks in class, too. Maybe he has some talent."

"Artists aren't well paid nowadays…" Sun-sun drawled, which caused her sensei to chuckle slightly "Did I say something funny?" she asked, feeling a heat crawl upon her cheeks

"Not at all, it's just a little strange that you immediately wondered how your father might take this new…occupation."

"He doesn't seem to mind it on the phone. However, he also sees Tesla's participation in the arts class as something to enrich his CV when he's applying for college." Sun-sun stated as they started their warm-up "But he really seems to enjoy it."

"I'm glad that he is. But if it does come up-don't search for potential career success. Talk about how people with a taste in arts are considered more refined instead. I've heard from an unspecified source that if between two candidates for a job in a bank one knows how to read a musical score, he'd get the job."

"Good idea." She said "Shall we begin then…"

"Soi Fong sensei…" a voice called and caused them both to turn around. Sun-sun blinked, before looking back at her teacher. Soi Fong seemed slightly disturbed, but answered calmly.

"Kuchiki sensei. It's good to see you."

Like many times before, whenever she was in the presence of the nobleman, Sun-sun felt like she was being under careful scrutiny. Slowly, she moved away from the fencing walk, as if she was getting in the way of something. And when she looked again at her sensei, the feeling only grew. The two were staring at each other very intently, very openly, and straight in the eye, which was considered either an act of offence, or…intimacy. Soi looked surprisingly at ease in the situation, but Kuchiki Byakuya looked like he was distressed. Or worried, at least.

Silently, she went over to her sack under the pretext of searching for something, giving them a chance to talk.

"My sister's been restless lately. Do you know why?" he stated immediately, not bothering to beat about the bush

"I'm afraid that the drama course isn't going as well as it should. We are encountering problems with the synch of the students. I think the play is off."

"Then you will cease the classes?"

"No, I'll finish them. I'll give them a little more time to work out their differences."

"Rukia takes a lot of time coming home. She claims she practices with the other students for their scene."

"That's possible. But they're not doing it in the gymnasium."

"Hmm….and what about Inoue Orihime? Is she better?"

"Yes. Apparently, it was just the heat. Nothing serious." Actually, she'd spent quite a lot of time with Orihime, trying to persuade her to talk. Not just to her brother, to talk at all. And even after that she had a lot of discussions with Stark-san, whether she needed 'professional help' or not. She finally managed to persuade him that a visit to the shrink might do her more harm than good, but at the cost of several million nerve cells.

"You seem very close with that family." He stated, something akin to anger lacing with his usually calm voice "You've spent a great deal in the hospital this week."

"She's one of my students. There was a slight misunderstanding in the hospital, and they needed me to settle it. Something about her documents. They called me because I have access to her school record." Not liking where this was going, Soi hurried to explain "Nothing more."

"Inoue Sora is a bachelor for quite some time. It's high time he picks a wife."

What was that? Jealousy? From a guy that used her exclusively for sex purposes only? Didn't they agree-sex without any obligation? Naturally, it meant you wouldn't go into another relationship, because you were already in one, be it strange or not. However, Soi only felt the anger boiling near the surface.

"So are you, Kuchiki-san. However, unlike you, he has to work hard for a living. I doubt that he would have the time to court a woman, and even if he does, he would really need to work on his sister before he goes any further. She's been without a mother figure for far too long to gain one at eighteen." That seemed to shut him up for a while "If you don't mind, Aizen-san and I have a lesson to take care of."

"Of course. Perhaps next time, I should join you." With that, he swiftly walked away from the gym.

* * *

_Why does that man look at you that way? Why does he act like he owns you? I can never ask you this, but I wish I could. Perhaps it's nothing. Perhaps you'd think I'm insane, when all I want to do is know. Is knowing a problem? Is it some kind of crime? And then, when I wonder what your answer might be, I suddenly decide I don't want to know. I wish I knew what I wanted to know. I wish…I wish…_

"Kami! I knew it!" The voice caught Sun-sun as she was making her newest entry to her notebook, making her leap up in the air and dropping it on the ground. As she bent down to retrieve it, she turned around slowly to look at the person who had dared interrupt her, and came face to fa…err...chest, with Neliel.

"Knew what, Neliel-san?" she stated slowly, as she got back on her feet.

"I knew that you were an aspiring writer, Sun-sun-san!" the girl exclaimed.

Jiruga Neliel was one of what her father called 'extravagant people'. She was in the same class as Kuchiki Rukia, as she was the half-sister of the arts teacher, Nnoitra-sensei. But on her part of the family, the half had played an important part, because she was nothing like her brother. Tall, curvy and pale, she got a lot of dirt because of her weird hair color (an ocean green that stunned people into silence when they first saw it), but her attitude was so sunny and cheerful that even Sun-sun, who hardly socialized with her fellow students, knew her. She was the class representative of her group, proud member of nearly every arts club in the school, always had a boyfriend with whom she broke up every Monday, and there were always enough candidates to assure that she had someone to spend the weekend with.

"You are wrong, Neliel-san. This is just some homework for the summer." Sun-sun replied, dusting the notebook off

"Nanao-san hasn't made us write letters…" she said "Has Shunsui-san decided to become some serious competition for her?"

Ah, yes…and she showed zero interest in formalities. She always called people by their given name.

"No…yes…erm…I decided to give myself homework. I don't want my grades in French to be failing."

"But your grades never fail. And what you write in there is really good anyway." She exclaimed, pointing at the notebook. Sun-sun flushed with discomfort upon realizing that she'd been spied on and never gotten a clue about it.

"For how long have you been standing there?" she said, feeling indignant

"Shouldn't I?" Neliel blinked, looking around herself. Without opening her mouth, Sun-sun pointed at the sign that was perched in the middle of the lawn behind the bench where she'd been sitting-_'Don't step on the grass'_. "Oh, come now, Sun-san! This is a park! Every part of it is public property!"

"But I don't think the gardeners will appreciate your stomping there." She said as she put her notebook back in her bag.

"The grass has seen worse than me!" the green-haired girl waved her hand and leapt over the bench to land on the aisle "That's beyond the point, Sun-san! You've got talent!"

"For writing homework. Just like the better part of the student body. As you well know, taking exams now is about following a pattern, not actual knowledge."

"But you write poetic homework. '_My beloved, my only one…_'" Sun-sun flushed again upon Neliel's quotation of the opening of the letter "It's like the opening of a poem!"

"I read about this in the Internet. They might give us an assignment to write from the point of view of someone we're not."

"That's alright, you don't have to justify your choice of theme! I bet you'd write just as well on whatever theme you choose to write." Neliel's eyes lit up "Have you ever thought about pursuing a career in writing? Journalism, maybe? Or editorship?"

"I'll be pursuing a career in medicine, Neliel-san. Japanese is not one of my favorite subjects."

"Shocking! The girl who graduates on top of every class doesn't like Japanese!" the girl squeaked in mock-terror, before erupting in giggles "That's alright, Sun-san. I can imagine how frustrating it might be to excel in everything. It gets boring after a while, no? I myself am pretty good, but I love writing."

"That's…good for you, I guess." Sun-sun drawled, wondering when she would make her point.

"Do you think you'd like to do some writing for the school paper with me?" Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!

Actually, the school paper hadn't even existed until Neliel went to high school. She'd been 'toying' with the idea in middle school (a.k.a. blew her teachers' heads up with complaints until they made a suggestion that settled her), and as soon as she set her foot in the academy as a junior, she mobilized the library club and calligraphy club (Kami knows how) to help her create it. Somehow, she'd managed to get funding from the school and some teachers to do some editing, but this year the last member of the said clubs had graduated and she'd been left alone.

She'd been pestering people to help her with the paper ever since, going far enough to sneak up on people doodling on their notebooks (you're a born artist! Come do some photos for me!), or, like Sun-sun (care to write and article or two?), but never hung around long enough to listen that nobody wanted to waist their time on a paper that would die with Neliel's graduation.

"My father wishes that I go to Todai, Neliel-san. I cannot spare time from my studying for my exams to write articles." Sun-sun stated calmly

"But you don't even need to put any effort into it. You are a natural writer! All you have to do is spare ten…no, five minutes every night, for one teensy article a week. Wouldn't it look good on your portfolio when you apply for college?"

"Not really. I'm not looking for a career in writing at all."

"But you like after school activities. You are in the fencing club and help out at the doctor's office! The more extracurricular activities you participate in, the better! Besides, you're a model student! If people see you participate, they'll definitely join. Maybe you'll nail some extra funding from the teachers."

"I'm hardly a role model for my own siblings, let alone other students." Sun-sun cut her off "I'm sorry, Neliel-san, but I just cannot help you. Please understand."

The girl opened her mouth a few times, before sighing and turning away. "Alright. Have a nice day, Sun-sun-san."

* * *

A/N-Did someone say Nel?

And yeah-Sun-sun-san is quite a mouthful. Lol


	14. California

Theme song: California by Savage garden

* * *

Walking into the school on Monday morning after a weekend of nightmares that she'd divided between the Inoue family and Byakuya. Really, Soi Fong couldn't understand why that man suddenly had a desire to be with her, but he'd been in her apartment for the greater part of Saturday and Sunday. He'd been there when she woke up, preparing the coffee. He'd seen her off as she headed for the hospital. He'd shopped for her and ordered take-out for them so that they wouldn't have to get out of the apartment. He'd taken her bags from her as soon as she walked in, and swept her off her feet to take her to the bedroom, where, in spite of the creaking strings, they fucked on her bed, urgently, desperately, again and again until she pointed out that they needed to eat/rest.

Not once did he contradict her. In fact, he'd hardly said anything to her, he'd let his actions speak for themselves. He was a constant part of her life for forty-eight hours, and she'd been a part of his. There was no privacy, no time to run to the mailbox or read e-mails without him looking over her shoulder. If her dreams became restless, he would wake her up.

Those reveries in particular had been troublesome. He told her she'd been muttering something, but he hadn't made out the words. Whether that was true or he was playing around, she didn't know or care. She'd cursed herself for even falling asleep, and without saying a word, desperate for some sort of release, of distraction, she climbed into his lap, kissed and caressed, and rode him until both saw white. When he'd finally left her bed and apartment, she felt tired and dirty. Never before had she been so naked, both figuratively and metaphorically, in front of any man.

But what waited for her today in the teacher's room took the cake. Soi walked through the door and was blinded by exuberance.

At first she thought that Kyoraku had gone overboard with his attempts of wining over Ise Nanao, his colleague French teacher. However, while she was carefully maneuvering around the many bouquets that adorned the room, she realized that they had a similar Chinese character written on a small card attached to them. Her family name.

One glance at the few teachers who were working there told her the rest. Those flowers were for her! And she only knew one man who had the motive and the money to buy her enough flowers to fill an entire God-damn botanical garden.

She stomped out of the office, feeling her face burning with humiliation, and headed straight towards the gardening club. She was sure the three remaining members would love to help her out in disposing of all those flowers.

On her way back, she passed through the arts classroom. From inside, she could hear a frantic screaming, although she couldn't tell what it was. Slowly, she pushed the door open and immediately the music blared in her ears even louder. It seemed to come from the room where Nnoitra-sensei kept the working materials. Already expecting something bad, she walked in to find the said teacher, wearing nothing but black and white striped boxers, standing in front of a canvas, elbow-deep in paint, listening to Merilyn Menson as his hands moved around frantically.

"Contemporary art, sensei?" She asked loudly, causing the man to start for a second

"Well ain't you a sneaky ho." He drawled as he turned off the record player "To wha' d'I owe th' ple'sure?"

"I'm not sure the entire building shares your musical tastes, Nnoitra-san. Can you please turn the volume down?"

"Yeah, yeah." He complied. 'This is the new shit' blared in the room again, this time enough for them to have a conversation without raising their voices too much "Ain't ya supposed to have class righ' now?"

"I will…" actually, she wanted to stall so that she could avoid Matsumoto-sensei's comments on the flowers in the common room "As soon as I can retrieve some things from my locker."

"The flowers yours?" He asked "Can I take some of 'em?

"Be my guest. But you better hurry before the gardeners' club take them all out." Soi said, walking behind him to look at the canvas, and had her eyes go wide "How can you pain this here?! Don't people walk into this room?!"

"What's wrong with it?" Nnoitra asked, looking behind his shoulder. The painting represented a horny ass grinding against the tree, while his head was turned back in an attempt to catch a shoe that was suspended from one of its branches.

"Won't they find something wrong in it?" she asked, blinking hard to dissipate the image "If Yamamoto knows…"

"He won't be bot'red. He act'ally has one of my works in 'is house."

"Really?"

"Yeah. 'The horny bitches'. He lov's it!"

"Lovely. Well, then I'll be going…" she turned on her heel, but something in the corner caught her eye. Slowly walking towards the portfolio there, she knelt to it. "Can I look?"

"Sure." He said, turning off the music and stepping towards the sink to wash his hands from the oils. "That's Tesla's work."

"Sun-sun's brother did this?" she asked, pulling the sketches out of the file. Inside, there was at least two dozens of pictures on various subjects, from landscapes of the seaside to etudes of human heads. There were some who were already painted in aquarelles, like a picture of a beach full of deformed people and naked children. There were even several portraits of people, amongst which she saw a common picture of Luppi and Sun-sun. She was just about to comment on how good they are, when she dropped one of them and, on the backside, there was a sketch that left her completely speechless.

"Kami…" she whispered as she took it in her hand "Have you seen that?"

"Yeah. Told 'im to blow that one up on a bigger canvas and try painting it over." Nnoitra said proudly "That boy's got talent."

I can't help but agree, albeit silently, Soi decided as she examined it slowly. On it, in broad pencil strokes, was painted a room with a bed, covered in a crumpled sheet. On it lay a woman, or a young girl, turned on her back, her face turned towards the observer. She was stark naked, her legs bend in the knee and currently standing on the tips of her fingers. Tesla had even managed to capture the straining muscles and the obvious pleasure written all over her features. One of her hands clutched the sheets, while the other one was somewhere down her body. You could not see it because of the arched back and hardened breasts, but given the theme it was pretty easy to guess where it was.

Without being aided by knowledge, Soi Fong could tell that this was happening in the afternoon. Somehow, she had the feeling that when this was painted in color, there would be bright orange light streaming from the window, revealing every small detail of the model's body to the observer. There was just this sort of…bold truth that is so characteristic for the noon/early afternoon hours of the day-there was no veiling, no shields around her, no mystery, everything about her was brutally brought out to the surface.

But in spite of all the staring she did, she couldn't make herself perceive the image as pornographic. There was just something about it that made the observer feel squirmy, uneasy, as if he was intruding on a very private, personal moment of someone's life. The girl's face showed nothing but the purest of pleasure, but there was also a feeling that if she opened her eyes and saw you, she would be hurt. What right do you have to see this? To know this? And yet you couldn't stop yourself from looking.

That's what made her finally put it away. Slowly, she rose and handed the portfolio to Nnoitra-sensei.

"So, Tesla drew this?" She asked slowly

"Yup. At first I thought it was a part of his oth'r series, but he told me it's bran' new."

"Other? He has more like this?"

"Yea. At Nagasaki, he snuck in the ladies' bathr'm to get a better look at 'em, and drew 'em. But he got busted and his ol' man sent him back before a scandal happened." Nnoitra snorted "Delusional bastard. Though the kid has some skill. I ougta fin' a way to get him in an exhibition."

Silently, Soi stalked out of the room. And for the next few hours the only thing in her mind was the fact that the model looked so much like Sun-sun.

* * *

Of course, she didn't ask her that at the course. She didn't ask it in the locker room, while they talked about how the weekend had gone (Soi had told her about the Orihime incident, judging that the girl was the only one sensible enough to know the news). She didn't ask her at practice, although she stared at the forms of her body under the thin T-shirt she wore for the hot weather, wondering if they were compatible with the model's. And when Kuchiki sensei walked into the gym, all attempts at conversation flew out of the window.

Already accustomed to this, Sun-sun gathered the things and started putting them away, as Soi removed the protection helmet she wore to look at her colleague.

"If I ask you what this is about, I suppose you will not tell me." She stated, keeping her voice low so that they didn't get Sun-sun involved in their fight

"That depends. What is 'this'?"

"Please do not play this game, sensei. I understand that I am in a country that differs greatly in culture and customs from mine, and that men of your kin are accustomed to offering things to women like me. However, if you wanted to give me a gift, why not send it to my home like you have before?"

"Did our colleagues give you trouble for the flowers?" he asked

"No."

"Then there is no problem."

"On the contrary, there is a problem, but I can't imagine how you can not acknowledge it. Did we not agree that we will be discreet about our relations?"

"Perhaps we have."

"Kuchiki sensei, I can't work with this one-sided conversation. If you have any respect for me, please answer my inquiry. Why have you changed your behavior towards me so suddenly?" at that point, Sun-sun had retreated to the dressing room, leaving them alone in the gymnasium.

Slowly, Byakuya walked towards her until their faces were almost touching, and said calmly:

"There is nothing to explain, really. I simply feel that I am mistreating you with my apparently indifferent behavior."

"Mistreating me?!" she blew up "I don't recall asking for you to give me presents either, but you did! I didn't get offended because we agreed not to take this relationship out of the boundaries of our simplest needs."

"Perhaps for you your needs are limited to what you receive in the bedroom. However, I cannot support the idea that I'm using you solely as a substitute for my wife. You know I think of her and call her name when I'm with you. I don't care if this does not offend, you, it offends me because I believe you deserve better than that. Also, I do not wish to engage in a relationship with a woman whom I've deprived of all personality and feelings for the sake of my own convenience. Therefore, I'd like to know you better. Allow me to do so."

With that, he moved swiftly towards her, closing the space between them, clamping his mouth, long, wet and warm, over hers, his strong hands bringing her to him before she could even register what has happened, or raise a hand to stop him. A suffocating feeling came over her and a faintness started to overcome her. But before she could break away for some space, sanity, and air, before she could object to him, or maybe slap him across the face, the door to the locker rooms closed softly, hiding from the two the form of one broken girl.

* * *

Sun-sun stumbled out of the gymnasium with the clear intention of getting home, locking herself into her room and crying her eyes out. However, she soon registered that she would have to wait for Tesla to finish, and thus she quickly hid into the girls' bathroom, locked herself in a cubicle and wept into a handkerchief as quietly as she could.

The school was silent, safe for a few voices that came from the clubrooms. Luckily for her, nobody came in to see her cry. And she herself hadn't done so since she was little, when such sights were considered natural. But why did she cry for? Because she was sad that her sensei already had someone? Because she was hurt that Soi had been friends with her with no intention to be anything else? Because she was angry that Kuchiki Byakuya had what she couldn't?

Maybe it was so.

But she didn't cry so much because of those reasons. No, the main cause of this hot rain of tears was the reality that had come crashing against her so suddenly on this hot summer day. The reality that Soi Fong could never be hers.

It was plain obvious that she was not interested in girls. If Kuchiki-sensei couldn't sweep you off your feet, you're either dead or homosexual! And he, apparently, liked her very much indeed, if he would dare show his affections so suddenly. Soi Fong was a single woman who was slowly approaching an age when a lady has to marry to be considered respectable, and if he should offer her marriage, why should she not accept? She deserved the very best, after all.

Such a simple truth and yet it hurt her so much, because it was so obvious that it made her feel even more stupid for not perceiving it earlier. Soi Fong could be her friend, but that was as far as it would go. Sun-sun could cope with everything-with people pointing their fingers at them, with never marrying, with never being able to have children…But she could never give her sensei what Kuchiki Byakuya could…she was no man…and because he was a man, just because he was a man, he got to see a side of her she would never see, and touch her in places she could never reach.

She cried a little over that, but then her watch told her it was time to pick Tesla up, and she got out of the cubicle. It wasn't anything but this sort of blind devotion, this…obligation to the habit that made her do so. In her state of lovesick dementia, she could easily imagine living in that cubicle, setting her life between its four walls, turning into some sort of campus legend for telling her family to fuck off and leave her to live in this small, cramped space that reminded her of her mother's uterus.

However, she didn't do it. She was too accustomed to doing what was right to rebel against it now. Now of all times.

Sun-sun splashed some water into her face, removed the traces of tears and composed her features into a passive mask. Maybe now she would find some peace. Maybe now she could convince herself that it was all a passing fancy, and after some years to look back on it with the same embarrassment older people feel when they remember something terribly silly they had done as children. But she needed some way to vent out the anger that had bubbled into her. Some way, whatever…

Slowly, she took out the notebook from her bag and turned its leaves mindlessly. It was the only physical proof that she had ever considered this thing real, and the only thing that reminded her of all the things they had shared between each other. In anger, she grabbed a fistful of pages and tore them off ruthlessly, put them under the water springing from the tap until they were completely wet, and tossed them in the trash bin. However, when she reached out for another, her throat went dry, she choked on a sob, and sank to the floor, cradling the now destroyed notebook in her hands. She attempted to save some of the pages from the garbage, but it was plain clear that they would dissolve if she touched them, and she let it go.

She would have to deal with what she had. Like always. Like ever.

* * *


	15. The beautiful people

* * *

Theme song: The beautiful people by Merylin Manson

* * *

Soi rubbed her temples exhaustedly, as she walked towards the school. A slow thumping was settling in her temples, warning her of an incoming headache, but it was too late for her to call it a sick day and stay in bed all day. She was pretty sure that if she did, it wouldn't take Kuchiki Byakuya long to show up on her doorstep with tea and chicken soup.

The young woman effectively pushed any thought about the latter in the back of her mind-she didn't need to muse over his actions right now. She had already done so in the past couple of days. It was impossible to say exactly what he had on his mind without speculating, and she really didn't want to do that right now. One thing was certain-he had called quits on all bedroom activity for the present moment, and she wasn't entirely sure whether it was a bad thing or not.

Sun-sun hadn't been in the locker room when she'd come either, but today they would have practice, which meant that she could talk to her. Maybe the only good thing that had happened this week was tucked safely in one of her pockets, waiting to be taken out. She had nearly went into a wild tap dance when she had received it this morning. The letter gave her all the more reasons to go to school today, so that she could give it to her student. Soi let out a small smile and quickened her pace, ignoring the fact that she would have to face Byakuya too.

As soon as she stepped trough the doors of the gym, she knew that something was wrong. There students were uneasy, and they were buzzing with anxiety. The bad kind of anxiety. But she didn't know what was going on until she neared them and realized that they were clustered around something. When she looked closer, she realized that Ichigo was arguing with a short, black-haired girl, whom she identified as Arisawa Tatsuki from the karate club. Soi's eyes narrowed-those two rarely interacted, but when they did, they always fought. It didn't help that she was Inoue Orihime's best friend, or that she had a better punch than any guy in school.

"This is your fault, do you hear me!" She was shouting, staring Ichigo straight at the face

"What is? What is my fault?"

"Don't play dumb! I know what you and that girl did to 'Hime!"

"What have I done? For Pete's sake, speak more clearly!" the orange-head fumed

"Do you think that because she's poor, she doesn't have feelings? That because we're both in this preppy little academy on scholarship, we have no feelings? Maybe you think that you can get away from your poor district background by dating a rich heiress, but let me tell you, Ichigo, you'll be weighed down forever by your guilty conscious!"

"Arisawa-san…" Rukia tried intervening "Please, understand, we haven't done anything…"

"Then why isn't 'Hime here? I know she signed up on this course, but she's never showed up! Why?!"

"Maybe she's sick. You cannot…"

"Don't tell me what I can or cannot do, you! Do you think I'm stupid or something? That I don't see what's happening? You guys have made her sick, you guys are killing her!"

"What is going on here?" Soi exclaimed, catching the attention of everyone in the room. The students turned around to look at her as she made her way to the three who were arguing in the middle of the cluster. "Arisawa, what's this about?"

"I knew there was something! Orihime is sick, sensei, Inoue Orihime! She was supposed to come to this course this month, but nobody's seen her or spoken to her since it began! I called her yesterday, but she refuses to even speak to me! It's all because of them! I know it is!"

"It's all about the Chronicles." Somebody said, and Soi turned an enquiring eye towards him

"The what?" both she and Ichigo asked at the same time

"The Chronicles. The Momogawa Academy Chronicles. We…err…it's a site on the Net, sensei. We all…most of us got a link to it last night, and we sorta checked it out. It's…it's about our school, sensei. There are stories about our school, and we…we read there that some girl drove herself to the brick of death when the guy she loved hooked up with another girl." Mizuiro explained "Every other story on this site is about one of us, sensei. There's a little something about everyone, and…we thought that the same goes for Inoue-san."

"It does! Why else wouldn't she talk to me?!" Tatsuki exclaimed "It's all because of you! You and that preppy rich bitch!"

"Watch your tongue, Arisawa." Soi scolded her "It's true Inoue is sick, but I can assure you, I've spoken to her the other night, and she was perfectly fine."

"But…" Mizuiro began again

"It's nothing to worry over." She went on "Apparently, she was very ill and it turned out that she needed to have her appendicitis removed. That's why she didn't come to any of our activities this month. She probably didn't talk to you, Arisawa, because she just didn't feel like it."

"Are you sure?" Tatsuki asked

"I'm sure. You shouldn't have gotten so worked out over some site that might not even be about this school. You and Kurosaki will settle your differences later. As for the rest of you, I don't know what caused you to become so hyper about this, but if Inoue-san was here she would've been terribly embarrassed that you react like this. Even though you might recognize your own story in the words of whomever writes this, you should not have become so stung."

There was a small silence, after which Soi, seeing that nothing good would come from this practice, dismissed the group.

* * *

One trip to the teachers' room told her that not only the students were stung. Matsumoto sensei had already gone out of her way to inform the rest of the colleagues of the discovery, and Soi found them gathered around a laptop, browsing through the page.

Luckily, Yamamoto was not among them, but as soon as she walked through the door, she was intercepted by Byakuya. Without beating about the bush, the Japanese teacher asked her if she knew of this.

"I just learned." She replied, taking a seat next to Ise sensei in front of the laptop. For her convenience, Matsumoto scowled up to the beginning of the page and let her read what was written, in bold red letters, as an introduction:

_The Momogawa Academy Chronicles: A Piece of Life As It Is_

_Momogawa Academy is a preppy private school where you either need money, or brains to get in. On the outside, it looks like every parent's dream of a learning institution-combining tradition with modern learning techniques, it offers the students knowledge and lessons in moral they can't get anywhere else. However, on the inside of those walls, many, many secrets live, and once you've been sucked into the whirl of the life as a student there, you cannot get out. One student is brave enough to expose all the dirty little secrets their classmates are keeping to the world. But what are those secrets? And who is the 'Eyes' of the world into this satanic Kingdome? Insert 100 yen to continue. _

That pretty much summarized what would happen next. The site was built as a sort of blog, only it contained hand drawn pictures of the fictionalized Momogawa academy and the class that was supposed to_ 'sleep, eat and learn, safely tucked in the walls of this ancient abbey of horrors'_. It was pretty much made to look like a scary story, but when Soi started reading the entries, she started getting the feeling of a cheap, yellow page magazine instead. "Romance blooms on the blackboard", read one of the titles. "Hate and love are close neighbors", said the other. "Student discovers new allergy when bullies take it too far" was the third. It was a detailed account of nearly every case of romance/injustice/discrimination that occurred into that academy, to those fictionalized people.

The one for Orihime, that had gotten everyone so stung before was entitled "Is one life enough of a price to find your soul mate?", and inside, the whole story was told word by word. How Orihime had known Ichigo since kindergarten and had begged her brother to help her get into the same school as him so that they could be together. How she had lived, hoping and aspiring for him to open his eyes every day through middle and high school. How her heart was eaten away by jealousy as she saw him fall in love with the rich, talented and traditionally beautiful Rukia. How desperate she was when she saw his efforts to be with her. How devastated she was upon finding that nothing could happen, leading her to turn to laxives and putting her fingers down her throat in one last attempt to be the woman he could never have.

Apparently, everyone but Ichigo and Rukia and Orihime had received a hyperlink to that site, but after today, all three would know. What was worse, their fictionalized alter egos were modeled after the author's prejudice towards them. Apparently, he or she was sympathizing with Orihime, turning the other two into evil villains who led her to illness and decay, and those who had already read the page and knew that it was indeed their academy, and their class described in that blog, automatically assumed that Ichigo and Rukia were in fact just as bad as those on the Web. No wonder they had been treated so badly today.

Soi realized with horror that there were entries about teachers as well. And not only that, love triangles between teachers and students.It wasn't difficult for her to recognize herself in the image of the stern German teacher Frau Dietrich, who fell in love with the handsome literate Oogami, but the part about fighting for his love with half her female colleagues and her own students was just plain silly. There was but one part of the whole thing that caught her attention-when she received a letter, opened it, expecting to be one of those hate rants she got when it became clear she dated Oogami, but found inside a rampant love letter, written in her own language, and signed by one of her female students.

Unfortunately, before she could get a better look at it, Ise sensei closed the page, announcing that this was ridiculous and that the students should not be getting so excited over something like this.

"This is obviously some person's wild imagination at work." She pursued, totally ignoring that she and Kyoraku were obviously used as role models for the Spanish teachers that hated each other, but banged in the broom closet during every spare minute. "One of the students obviously saw a little more than there is, and send it around, spreading the paranoia."

"But Nan-chan…" Matsumoto pointed out "Some of those guys are just like us."

"A coincidence, of course." Soi said slowly "Nothing more. People don't have such a diverse palette of characters, anyway."

"So you are ignoring the fact that some of those things are exactly what they are in here? Inoue…"

"Inoue was operated from appendicitis." Soi said, taking her things "Excuse me, I have a fencing lesson in five…"

"Wait, sensei…" Kuchiki Byakuya said, and followed her out. Soi sped up her pace, more to get away from the common room than to get away from him. He, however, seized her by the elbow and made her stand still. "Is this true? Is Rukia really going out with Kurosaki Ichigo?"

"It's a coincidence, nothing more." She hissed back "Have I been attacked by the female half of this academy? No. Have I received love letters from my students? No. And even if your sister and Kurosaki have something going on, what difference would that make. They definitely didn't make Inoue sick!"

"It makes a difference to me." He replied "I will not have some boy drag Rukia back. I will not have her tied down with a scandal either."

"This is a fictionalized account of a fictionalized school. You obviously read it. Do you really think that this man who you think is you have anything in common with the real you?"

"No."

"And is there anything in Dietrich that resembles me? No." she took a deep breath "Please, sensei, Aizen-san is waiting for our lesson. We will talk about this later."

He let her go. What else could he do?

* * *

Sun-sun wasn't there when she arrived. She wasn't there when Soi changed into her uniform. She didn't come five, ten, thirty minutes after the time their practice was supposed to begin, and Soi was starting to get worried.

Of course, she'd lied to Byakuya. She knew that there was something going on between his sister and Ichigo, but before she'd seen it, she'd been told about it by Sun-sun. It had been Sun-sun who clarified things for her, who told her of what happened and why, simply because she easily saw what the others couldn't. Fifteen minutes in their appointed training time, Soi broke down, took out her cell and entered the Net, dialing quickly the address of the Chronicles and getting herself an account there. Then, sitting cross legged on the floor, she read every single entry about Frau Dietrich, and froze on the part of the love letter.

_"My beloved, my darling dear,_

_How many times do I have to say that I love you in my mind, too scared to utter the words out loud? You would never know. Just like you would never know the shameless love I have for you, or at least you would never know in time to reproach me for it. I know you think me horrid for calling you, for writing to you so intimately, and I beg your forgiveness. _

_But how can I not, when every time I see you my heart leaps? Tell me how can I not call you mine, when the very utterance of your name causes me to hold my breath? When I survive on the words you speak, when I go to bed with the memory of you, when I converse with your spirit in my dreams and when I wake up with your name on my lips? If you only knew how ugly I feel for putting my feelings in these crude words, but I feel uglier for sharing them with this piece of paper than with you…_

_I know I cannot have you for myself. My family, my standing, my very gender forbids me to love you. I cannot even share my suffering with anyone, out of fear that I'll be taken away from you, and be denied the little pleasure I have from seeing you every day, from running into you, from speaking to you. You don't know how angry my classmates make me for hating you because of Oogami-san, but I hate him even more, because he gets to see you, and touch you, and have your love, just because he's a man. _

_I pray that you reach these lines. That you have not thrown this letter away with disgust. That you have accepted this knowledge, and maybe, you will forgive me for my feelings. By the time you get this, for me, it would not even matter,_

_Yours, forever…"_

Soi set her phone down and closed it, running her hands through her bangs absent-mindedly. Could this be what she thought it was? Surely, this could be no more than a freaky coincidence, but she knew better. That mysterious writer had somehow learned the specifics around Inoue Orihime's illness, and the only ones who knew them were Stark, Sora, Orihime, herself, Uliquorra, and Sun-sun, with whom she'd shared them because she felt that Inoue would need an accomplice amongst her class who could help her through the hard times that lay ahead. Unless Uliquorra had spoken about it with someone, which was something she doubted for a reason, Sun-sun was the only person who could've written those things.

But Soi just couldn't imagine how she could've done this. For starters, Sun-sun was not gifted enough to set up such a page in such a short time. Then, all of these entries could have been written over the course of many, many months. And, of course, there was the part about the strong presence of the author in this blog. Sun-sun just wasn't the type of girl to write such an unbiased account of her own classmates, be them the ones she disapproved of.

And if it was Sun-sun, then who would be the author of this letter? The girl who was signed under it was not mentioned in the entries about Frau Dietrich, but the site was posing the retrospective question, "Which one of those students is the author? Who is the 'Eyes'?". Could the author be this girl who wrote the same love letter, professing her lesbian love for her teacher? And if it was…who was she in the real life? Someone who supported Frau Dietrich, but did not like Oogami. Someone who had inside on everyone and everything, but did not remain impartial, in spite of appearances.

Everything pointed towards Sun-sun. The implications were making her head hurt, and Soi had to rub her temples in an attempt to relax. She had to talk to her. She had to make this clear…but first she had to pull herself together first. Before she talked to anyone, she had to focus.

The door to the gym opened abruptly and a very disheveled Sun-sun came in. She seemed like she'd just leapt out of bed-her hair was a mess, and her T-shirt was put on backwards. She staggered to her sensei and dropped to her knees. "Forgive me…" she rasped "I overslept. I'm sorry, sensei. Thank you for waiting for me."

"That's not important right now." Soi said, forcing her to stand up and look at her. At the same time, she pulled her phone out and showed the page to Sun-sun "Do you about such a blog? What's the meaning of this?"

For a few minutes, the girl stared at her, absolutely clueless, before looking down at the screen. Her eyes went wide as she read on, her mouth closed and opened on even intervals, until she finally looked up at her sensei. The look on her face made Soi even more suspicious. Finally, she said:

"We have to talk, Sun-sun."

* * *

A/N-Guess who turns eighteen on the thirteenth...I'm so depressed!

* * *


	16. Viva la Vida

Theme song: Viva la Vida by Coldplay

* * *

Have you ever had a near-death experience? Have you ever felt anything close to resembling it? The way your ears go absolutely deaf, your stomach churns with emotions, and the only thing that you feel, other than hear, is the way your heart hammers against your ribs as the world slowly fades into darkness.

Trump…

Trump-trump…

Trump…

Trump-trump…

That's where habit kicks in. It was a life-savior, as Sun-sun followed mechanically her sensei to the locker room, the only place where the two could actually talk without getting interrupted or overheard by someone. It gave her enough time to get over the shock and figure out something to save face in front of Soi Fong…that is, if her brain had been working at its full capacity to figure something out on this matter.

However, it was dead. Blown a fuse. Out cold. Absolutely irresponsive. All because her sensei had shown her the phone!

Sun-sun was clutching the gadget so hard it would've broken if her hands weren't as delicate. The words danced in front of her eyes, yet their sense was perfectly clear to her. Wouldn't a mother recognize her own child? Her words practically spilled from the lines, and she didn't need to focus to know where they came from. Her diary…or, at least, the few pages of it she'd thought she'd trashed, had somehow made it into the web, and had taken life into this site. The only difference was that this was perverted and twisted until her initial intention was absolutely destroyed. These weren't the words she wanted to tell her sensei, though the letter was almost word-to-word copied from her journal.

She swallowed, feeling her throat becoming strangely dry all of the sudden. Soi Fong wasn't stupid. She'd know that this was written by her, that these events were taken from her own life, and, worst of all, that she was in love with her.

Sun-sun couldn't breathe. Mortification was sipping through her body and she was sure her arms were shaking furiously. How did things go from simple to complicated in such a short time? Oh, wait, they'd never been simple. Still, when her crush was kept only to herself, Sun-sun was feeling like she was in control. This…Internet blog did seem like a good idea for someone like her, who would appreciate the anonymity and insignificance, but people who were involved read it and they did see through the changed names and hyperbola. Sun-sun would have never done that, but her sensei couldn't know it.

Looking up, she saw Soi pace around the locker room, clearly out of her skin with anger. Sun-sun gulped. "Sensei, I…"

"Do you know anything about this?" She asked abruptly, turning on her heel and staring at her student angrily. Sun-sun was rather taken aback…she wasn't accusing her directly?

"I….no." She stuttered, and that wasn't wholly untrue. After all, she really didn't know anything about the site.

"Are you sure? Did you tell anyone what I told you about Inoue?" Soi Fong planted herself on the bench next to her student "Did you really not tell this to anyone? And you're not responsible for this, are you?"

"I am not responsible for anything, especially not this." Sun-sun exclaimed heatedly "And I swear, I did not tell anyone about this. It's not like I have anyone to tell anyway."

"That's not relevant." Soi Fong sprang on her feet again, running her hands through her hair absent-mindedly "Sun-sun, this is important. You of all people can recognize what is going on here. Somebody with a lot of insight about the things going on in this school has written this, somebody who obviously has an opinion about this. I don't know about the rest of those stories, but the one with Inoue has been confided between her brother, Uliquorra-sensei, the social worker assigned on the case, you and myself. I chose to share this with you because I could rely on your discretion. I sincerely hope that I have not been wrong here."

"You were not! What can I tell you to make you believe me?" Sun-sun exclaimed "Inoue's problems do not concern me. I have no merit in telling people about them, especially not in such a disgusting way."

Soi Fong leaned in until she was all but breathing in her face. "You find this disgusting, huh?"

"Yes, sensei." She replied with as much dignity as she could muster "I find it a low blow, a disgusting move, a very out of place joke. I'd never pay money to read about the suffering of others, and I would never charge money for it either!"

"So, that is your final position?" she asked

"It is my only position, sensei." Was the firm reply

"I see, then…" Soi let out a small breath and then actually smiled "Thank God. I'm glad, Sun-sun, I'm really glad. I don't think I could've handled it had your answer been different."

Sun-sun paused, stunned by her teacher's sudden change of mood. It was surprising how that woman could go from accusing to relieved in a matter of milliseconds, especially if it was someone like Soi Fong. She wondered if there might be some catch, but then remembered that this was probably the closest she'd ever get from having her sensei admit some special feelings towards her, so she hurried to remember the moment.

Actually, it was a pretty damn good moment and the knowledge that her sensei had been more concerned about Sun-sun's participation in the making of this site instead of the thing itself was only adding to the gleeful, happy feeling that was bubbling up in her. Even if she was just a student, Soi Fong had openly admitted that she cared greatly for her, even when she was not at school. It was a sort of love a teacher has for a favorite student, not a pet, but a student, and it was worth being happy about it because…well…quite frankly, she hadn't had anything close to it before.

But what could she do about all this? Tell the truth? Risk the little affection her teacher had for her, but do the right thing? It was a horrifying thought, but Sun-sun knew that it would only get worse if she kept her mouth shut now.

"Sensei, I'm not involved in any way in the making of this site, but…" she paused "I think I may have a theory about how some of the stories reached it."

Soi Fong, who was in the middle of unlacing her indoor shoes, paused and looked up. "What do you mean, Sun-sun?"

"I have not shared this information with anyone, but I…recently began a journal, one in French, where I mentioned some of the things that bother me about the school, especially the fact that Inoue-san was going through so much and yet she'd have it the hardest when she comes back. I…" she paused "I have not shown this journal to anyone, and my family has not seen it because I started it a few days ago. However, on Monday, I…" she took a deep breath "I trashed some pages from it, and I fear that it is possible for someone to have found them."

For a long moment, Soi Fong stared at her. Then, she asked. "Possible?"

"I soaked them in water and dumped them in a trash bin." Sun-sun explained "I was pretty sure that the words were illegible, but I cannot be certain."

Her sensei tapped her foot down angrily, impatiently, taking quick, calculated breaths through her nose. Sun-sun could tell she was going out of her way to remain calm and composed, even though anger was obviously bubbling up to the surface. She couldn't blame her, really-even though Sun-sun had been blinded by anger and depression at that time, she should have been more careful. She should have either torn the pages up or thrown them into a trash bin far away from school, where they wouldn't be found by someone who could obviously understand who was who there. Never mind the fact that her embarrassing and shameful love for her teacher could become public knowledge, Inoue-san's problem had become widely known throughout their classmates and Sun-sun couldn't help but feel guilty about that. After all, she'd been trusted with this secret to make Orihime's life more bearable in September, and she'd let it leek out-what did that say about her character?

"Alright…" Soi Fong took one last calming breath before focusing on her student "I cannot deny that I'm very disappointed, Sun-sun. Not as much with you, but with myself. I suppose I was a little too exigent, expecting you to take this secret on with so many others and keep it absolutely hidden. I did not consider the fact that you too need an outlet of your emotional tension, for which I am sorry. I realize now that I put too much pressure on you."

"Sensei, I…"

"Please, understand, I'm still mad at you for acting so foolishly, but I cannot blame you. You wouldn't have expected people to dig around in trash bins, let alone recreate old pieces of garbage. There is no certitude that this happened, either. But from now on, we must by all means counter the rumors. We owe Inoue this much."

"Of course." She nodded, strangely pleased at the use of 'we'. It made her feel like a part of something big, something whole…a team, perhaps.

"Very well." Soi stood up slowly and stepped out of her shoes "It's too late for our lesson now, but we can catch up on it on Friday. When does your family come back?"

"Sunday, sensei." Sun-sun replied, wondering if it would be too much to ask if she could take a shower as well…not so much as to wipe the sweat off but as to peek at Soi Fong. As soon as the thought came out, she slapped herself.

"I see." Soi hesitated before she pulled her T-shirt over her head. Suddenly, the letter she was carrying in her pocket rustled and reminded her of something she'd forgotten to do over the last few hours. Something that had been pushed aside by anger and supposed betrayal. Oh, well…now they'd straightened things up… "Sun-sun, there's one more thing…"

"Yes?" she looked up.

"As a child…" Soi began "My father was the secretary of a grand man, and through his job I became friends with the grand man's daughter. Currently, she's a rather scandalous figure, a sort of philanthropist who is very big in the US for her support for…err…homosexual-friendly projects, such as allowing same-sex marriage and equality of adoption. Since she herself married to a woman in Spain, and currently expects a child with her…well…she had some favors she owes me, so I contacted her and breached the subject of your mother."

"You….did?" Sun-sun's eyes went wide. "Because she's such an activist, you thought that she might know her?"

"Actually, it's more. The lady in question is Shihoin Yoruichi. She's the…woman your mother married. I didn't know whether I should do this or not, but since you mentioned that you wanted to know your mother, lesbian or not, I took it upon myself to contact my old friend and beg her assistance in…helping you correspond." With that, Soi pulled the letter out and handed it to Sun-sun. "This arrived today, and I wanted to give it to you as soon as possible. Given the…delicacy of the situation, I cannot let you take this home, but I'll most certainly take good care of it…and the rest of the letters that would come if you choose to write her back."

Sun-sun just stared between her and the letter, mouth gaping open and closing like a goldfish thrown out of the water. Soi let out a tiny smile. "I'll leave you to read this, then. Be sure to be ready when I finish back there."

The young woman stared behind her, not really able to muster up a coherent answer, before looking down at the letter. It looked pretty beaten up, but it was probably how things were with all the customs and stuff. Sun-sun debated whether this was a good idea, before cracking it open and reading the words, written in an elegant script on the sheet of paper.

_"Dear Sun-sun…"_

I'm not going to cry, the young girl thought, I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to…ah, damn it!

* * *

Soi cranked the shower open and glanced over to the dressing rooms. Sun-sun was out of sight, but if she craned her neck, she might have been able to get a look at her back. But no…she wouldn't do that. Sighing, the petite woman rubbed the shampoo into her head and closed her eyes shut to keep the foam away. She'd worry about her student's reaction when she was finished.

And what a reaction that would be? Well, she couldn't tell for certain. After everything that had happened today the giving of the letter had seemed mundane, almost burdensome to Soi. It was incredible how the happy, content feeling that she'd been harboring when thinking about that moment could turn into fatigue. For one thing, she wasn't sure if Sun-sun really wanted this letter, this connection with her mother. Oh, sure, she'd said that she'd wanted to know her, but Soi was not entirely certain with whom her loyalties lied.

Not to mention that her mother had left them. Ok, she was banned with a court order from seeing her children, but surely there was some way for them to come into contact sooner. Soi couldn't believe that even with Yoruichi's help Halibel couldn't have arranged to see her kids, or talk to them…unless the problem wasn't lying in legal arguments. Maybe she'd been too afraid to come back.

Whatever the reasons, Sun-sun was not obliged to forgive her if Halibel asked her to. She did not owe her a response either…But in the end, Soi hadn't been obliged to contact Halibel either. Actually, from the one time she'd met Aizen Sosuke, she'd gotten the distinct impression that this guy didn't like people to meddle with his plans, and that he took the offences against him _very_ seriously. Soi's motives, too, did not do her justice. Whether Halibel was bad influence on her kids or not, the fact that she'd been forbidden to come into contact with them still stood, and if this ever came out, Soi's refuge in Japan was going to be threatened.

She thought it would be worth it if it made Sun-sun happy. With the letter addressed to her student had arrived another one, with Yoruichi's address on the envelope, but written by Halibel, to Soi Fong. It was curt and to the point-the woman did not entirely understand why her daughter's teacher decided that a contact should be made after so many years, or why would she go as far as to call a favor from Yoruichi, but overall, she'd been glad that it happened and wished for nothing else but to contact her girl.

Soi turned her head upwards, letting the cold water lash in her face. She'd know soon enough…was there any point in worrying over that before it even happened.

Just then, there was a soft rustle behind her, and before Soi could register the movement, two hands wrapped around her neck. The woman all but screamed with surprise, before she realized that Sun-sun had somehow managed to sneak up on her and hug her from behind.

"Sun-sun?!" She exclaimed, trying to reel back and look at her student. However, the girl's grip only tightened, as if begging her to stay like this. Soi couldn't understand what was going on, until she heard a soft sniffle, and let out a tiny smile tug at her lips. She let her hands went up to rest on Sun-sun's, returning the gesture, albeit clumsily. The letter was hanging from one of her hands, the letters and words becoming illegible underneath the spray of water.

"Sun-sun…" Soi whispered, tugging at her hands more firmly "Sun-sun, you better let go. You're going to get drenched here."

"Just a little longer." She whispered "Just a little longer, please."

Soi let out a small sigh and relaxed herself, her posture speaking three parts annoyance and one part sweetness. Then, just as she was debating whether or not Sun-sun had fallen asleep, she finally spoke up, hesitantly:

"Sensei…I love you."

* * *

**A/N-A thousand apologies for this late and rather crappy little chapter. Blame it on my douche of a doctor who all but told me I had tuberculosis on my latest checkup. Honestly, sometimes I freak out with the national health service in my country.**

**Review anyway, and Sun-sun might just have one of her heavenly orgasmic dreams come true. **


	17. Grieg piano concerto a moll 1mvt

"Honestly, now, you should've been more careful." Soi Fong sighed as she put the much abused letter on the window stand, hoping that the heat from outside would dry up the leaf so that it could be preserved. God knew that this was probably pointless and useless because it was just a used piece of paper, but she expected that her student wanted to keep this first piece of correspondence, the first of many to come, hopefully.

Sun-sun looked at her sheepishly from the bench, her clothes so wet from the shower that Soi wondered if suggesting she take them off so that they would dry faster was not that irrelevant. However, she was straining her limits as it was, and she knew that there would be a lot to talk about with her student.

"Well…" Soi began "It'll probably dry off, but I can't say with certitude that it would be any readable."

"That's alright, sensei." Sun-sun said placidly "I remember everything from it. I'll definitely have a response ready by Friday."

"Good, that's very good indeed." She hesitated, before moving around to her locker. She'd have to get dressed, after all, although she suddenly felt strangely shy around her student. Sun-sun was looking at her, and moving through this…uneasiness, so to speak, was going to take time. "I suppose that when your family comes back, you'll have to be careful how you write those letters, though."

"Don't worry. I'll be very careful." Sun-sun replied "I'm sorry you must work as a sort of an…ambassador between her and me."

"You never asked to come into contact with her, nor did you make me in any way take this responsibility. There is nothing to apologize for. If I didn't want to do this, I wouldn't have done it."

"Sensei…" Sun-sun began "I…"

"You'll have to be weary, though. You can't write these letter wherever you want, if you get caught I'm not sure that your father will be very pleased. In spite of what you say, you're still under his custody and you have to follow his rules."

"That's not a very adult thing to say, is it? Sensei…"

"What is it, Sun-sun?" she asked, feeling weary of what was to come next

"That letter that was posted on the blog…it was taken from my journal as well…that's how I knew that it had served as an inspiration of some sorts." She blushed profusely "Not the letter itself, mind…I'd never use such language, ever, but…well…I know the concept was taken from it."

Soi let out a small sigh. Sun-sun was shy, but when she did speak, she hit the nail on the head. And some nail that was! She chewed on her lip, struggling to keep her composure. "I see…Still, it's not your fault, Sun-sun. Whomever did this was probably either very desperate or very bored to actually dig in the trash…although I cannot imagine anyone who would be desperate for such a thing."

"Sensei…you're not…disgusted, are you?" Sun-sun asked hesitantly, standing up. "About…what I said…"

"Of course I'm not." Soi sighed again, briskly taking the towel off and starting to dress quickly, hoping that she'd be able to gather her thoughts up. "I'm not disgusted, or worried, or weary of you Sun-sun."

"I told you I loved you, sensei." She insisted

"I heard you, Sun-sun. I'm not rejecting your feelings…" Soi hesitated "I do accept them, actually. But right now, I cannot reciprocate them."

"I'm sorry…" she bowed her head "I've heard rumors of what happened before in America. It must be…unpleasant to have history repeat itself."

"Have you Googled me?" Soi asked, more amused than angry "Because if you have heard rumors, you wouldn't be blaming yourself. I was the one that was charged."

"Ultimately, however, it was that student who confessed that she liked you."

"For reasons I cannot point out right now, I cannot share with you what happened back then…or at least, my opinion of it, but I can definitely say that your way of letting me know is preferable to the one she chose."

"You just contradicted yourself, sensei." Sun-sun giggled

"I did, didn't I?" Soi mused "Whatever the case…I'm not angry or displeased in some other way of what you did. In fact, if the situation was different, I would have…I'm not sure how prudent it is to say this right now…"

"You think that if you weren't a woman, my teacher, and considerably older, you might have been able to say that you love me back?" Sun-sun suggested sadly

"Gender has little to do with it." Soi replied "Yes, it is an impediment in most societies, but I've had the opportunity to live in one where affairs between consenting adults are left to themselves…mostly." She glanced at her student, surprised at the slightly awed and…well, there really was no way of describing it. The girl looked almost…hopeful. "Sun-sun, please don't get too excited about this…"

"Was I, sensei?" She asked, a little smirk playing on her lips

"Yes, you were." Soi sighed "Please, understand, this is difficult as it is. I like you a lot…more than a lot of people. More than…I think more than I liked Yoruichi-sama, which, by the way, was a lot, so you should understand that…"

"I understand." She stood up and walked towards her "So you're saying that in some time, you might accept my feelings and reciprocate them, is that correct."

"I sure hope I don't end up hurting you. It would be more than I could handle."

"I understand." Sun-sun repeated "Thank you, sensei."

"I was just saying that you shouldn't expect anything from me at this moment." Soi replied sternly, although the little stupid tint of pink on her face gave away the whole air of the scene "You are my student, I cannot…express my feelings towards you. I don't know how appropriate this conversation is right now for the two of us, at least in the eyes of the people who run this school…but I won't let you down. I don't think I can, even if I wanted to."

"Thank you." Sun-sun smiled, leaning in for a hug, a much gentler one than the one from before, but this time, Soi returned it properly. After that, she took the letter and left her student to change and go home. Needless to say that there wasn't much training done that day.

* * *

June elapsed into August, and August elapsed into September. Sun-sun's family came back from Nagasaki and the house was pretty much filled with the usual banter, complaints and the occasional scandal. Her father didn't seem particularly pleased with Tesla's mini-obsession with painting, but as far as he knew, his son was only developing one of his many gifts, so why deny him another good mark on his school record? Of course, Aizen Sosuke hadn't met Nnoitra-sensei, but Tesla had apparently decided that the introduction could wait for the next parent-teacher conference.

Which was drawing pretty close, with the start of the autumn term and everyone preparing for the National exams. With one third of the year already gone, there was a sense of urgency in the air that got even to the laziest of students. There was also that problem with Inoue and what she would do when she came back to school. Although Soi Fong had done her share of discreet inquiries in the make-up classes she was having with the difficult students, she still couldn't imagine who would possibly be behind the Momogawa Academy Chronicles. Her best guess was that it was a senior, since they could probably get away with it easily, and it was mostly seniors that it talked about anyways.

After the pretty public release of the blog, there had been two more entries, of three stories each. There was no reported development on Soi Fong's "romance" with Byakuya and Sun-sun's "one-sided" love, which was probably a good thing because she wasn't sure how to react when people caught on about that one. Well….ok, not any truthful development. The blog portrayed the relationship between the teachers as troubled because of the man's noble heritage and the woman's foreign status, but by the looks of it there would be the usual cheesy happy ending for those modern day Romeo and Juliet. However, there were real updates on the Orihime story, about Ichigo and Rukia's not almost constant dates and even more constant fights. Soi was pretty sure that their actions would just scream 'awkward' when classes started again, and Orihime was bound to feel horrid with her classmates gossiping about her all the time. If she ever got her hands on that stupid gossipmonger, she was going to ring his neck.

Aside from that, there was a rather amusing short story about a girl who'd gotten addicted to fellatio and a boy with a rather masochistic urge to get in the way of speeding cars, but other than that, there wasn't much on that blog that could help Soi in finding that perpetrator. Perhaps now that she warned Sun-sun to keep her journals under lock and hey and not throw pages into the trash bin, the gossipmonger would run out of plausible material for his virtual yellow pages and people would lose interest in it.

The whole situation would've been heavy and uncomfortable between the teacher and her student, but in fact, it was quite lighter than before. Sun-sun explained to her father that she wanted Soi Fong to give her more lessons in English, because she considered applying for a school abroad. Her father was skeptical at first, but Sun-sun quickly convinced him that applying wouldn't be much of a problem and that if she got invited, it might push some schools in Japan to offer her a scholarship. When he readily agreed to it, she was almost ready to jump five feet in the air and do a tap dance of joy, but she remained composed until she got to her room. This is only one battle, only one battle, she told herself…but it was so much more!

Soi gave her lessons and homework, but they inevitably spent half their time just talking. Neither mentioned the confession and tiptoed around everything concerning the love. It wasn't like it had become a freaking taboo, it was just a topic that had proven to make both of them slightly edgy and uncomfortable. To her credit, Soi busted the lock on her door and used it as an excuse to change it, thus depriving Byakuya of any unannounced visits in the middle of the night. Needless to say that she didn't give him the new key, and she calmly told him that she had some family problems, thus she would be unavailable most of the time as nighttime was the only good moment for her to come in contact with her parent.

Luckily for her, Unohana returned from her vacation and her presence managed somehow to lower the tension between the two when the little group went out for drinks. Byakuya even took her sudden abstinence after a month of almost interrompu sex lying down (in the figurative sense of the word…she hoped), and didn't press her for information on her family matter. Actually, Soi was beginning to worry that this sudden quiet retreat was the sign of a bigger storm coming. He still sent her flowers at school, although these were more modest bouquets (modest, as in only two dozens tops), which she could easily dispose of before anyone saw them. The gardener's club was flourishing.

But other than that, Soi and Sun-sun interacted quite nicely. They even listened to music together, which proved to be rather trying for both as their musical tastes differed as much as the moon and the sun. However, their conversations were so much in synch that you could set your watch by them. Sun-sun's sudden desire to apply overseas, preferably in Europe, where she could earn a full scholarship by both good grades and on athletic merits, was not all that inspired by a facilitating her entry in Todai. She figured that being half a globe away from her parents would only help her if to break away from the family nest….both literally and metaphorically. She was slightly less worried about Tesla, who seemed to come to life with his new hobby, and shared this with Soi Fong.

"I'm proud of him." Sun-sun smiled slightly "I think he might be able to be a little like me after a couple of years."

"Nobody can be like you, but your brother certainly has a lot of potential." Soi thought about the pencil sketch in Nnoitra's office and wondered for the umpteenth time if the girl wasn't Sun-sun. Of course, she couldn't ask her that, but with recent events in mind, she couldn't help but wonder. "Does your father have plans for him as well?"

"Probably. He's more bendable than Luppi, in any case." Sun-sun frowned "I'm not sure that Tesla really wants to be an artist though…"

"Mhm?" Soi eyed her over her cup of tea

"I mean, he's usually very submissive, but he's hardly stayed anchored to a single hobby for a long time. He takes lessons in Chinese because my father absolutely insists on it, but any other activity, like swimming or running or even badminton never held his attention for a long time. He got kicked out of the teams because he spent more time spacing out than doing anything else. For the first time, he seems to take something so seriously. But I'm not sure that he'll want to make a living out of it."

"Well, what does he want to do?" Soi asked, wondering off handedly if any of those sports involved changing in the locker rooms. Nnoitra had shown her several more of Tesla's paintings, and while he had no problem drawing nude females, there were no men, clothed or naked. She wondered… "Tesla's not very sociable, is he?"

"Yes, he isn't. He seems to get along better with girls, I guess. He's not intimidating or perverted, so they feel a sort of endearment, and with having so many sisters…" Sun-sun glanced up at her "Is something wrong, Sensei?"

Soi tried to focus on the conversation and how 'sensei' felt more like a sort of endearment rather than a professional title. She had the feeling that Sun-sun would be calling her that long after graduating, and she couldn't even begin to imagine what this was doing to a certain part of her body.

* * *

However, there were obviously many people whose certain body parts were still affected by certain activities, and those people wanted action. To cut to the chase, Kuchiki Byakuya decided that he'd waited long enough and, the day before the opening ceremony of the autumn session, he asked Soi to take a walk with him in the school yard.

She followed, wondering wearily if she could've bailed out, but since Yamamoto wanted to brief everyone on their duties for the following day, she couldn't do anything about it. Unohana gave them a worried look as they exited the door, and Soi couldn't help but worry if Byakuya had told her anything. _Nah_, she shook her head, _it's more likely that she caught up on that herself_.

"Kuchiki-sensei, I'm not sure that Yamamoto-sensei was done with his explanations." She tried to back out, but Byakuya just gave her a stern look over his shoulder and motioned that they walk underneath the heavy shades of some chestnut trees in the school yard. They were still blindingly green, yet there were specks of yellow and brown here and there, suggesting that very soon, the ground would be covered by the crunchy, heavy, earth-toned carpet of autumn. He caught a leaf between his fingertips and swirled it carefully.

"_Life is flowing down, _

_Not withering sakura,_

_But fading colors."_

"Kuchiki-sensei…" Soi replied sternly "I believe I have made it obvious to you that I'm not capable of standing equal to your poetry accomplishments. Why must you remind me of my incompetence."

"I was just trying to point out a fact." He replied flatly, looking at her with the leaf in his hands as if it was obvious.

"You mean that we're not getting any younger, and that while life does not wither as quickly as cherry blossoms, it still fades away like the power of there trees?" She asked, rummaging her brain for some knowledge on the symbolism of haiku. He nodded.

"You understand my hint, then." He nodded

"I do not see how this has anything with me." Soi shook her head "Perhaps I should have made this clear a month ago, Kuchiki-sensei, but…"

"You do not wish to continue your relations with me." He finished for her

"Yes." She nodded "Although you are a good friend to me and I really respect you, I do not think that we should continue the way we are now. Please understand."

"You needn't explain yourself to me. When we…consorted for the first time two months ago, we began this with the understanding that it would be…how do you call it in America…a 'friends with benefits' sort of relationship. Without emotional attachment or anything else."

"Yes."

"However, as you may remember from our conversation a month or so ago, I said that I was no longer content with the lack of emotional attachment in our relations. I wished to please you. And I still do."

"That is good, however, I do not wish that. I'm sorry. I think that it is best that we cut off our relations completely. I don't think that my…initiation in your company with Unohana-sensei was a good idea. Please accept my sincerest apologies." She bowed. However, he remained unfazed.

"I can see that you do not experience the…sort of attachment towards me that the relationship I desire from you requires."

"That is right." She nodded, praying to every known entity, from Buddha to Elvis' fluffy slippers that he got it this time.

"Then I suppose that there is only one thing left for us to do." He said "Marry me."

Soi's eyes snapped open and she gaped at him. "Wha-…."

"Marry me." He replied evenly, as if he'd just made a remark on the weather.

In spite of the fact that she was obviously NOT hallucinating or hearing wrong, she felt she owed it to both of them to ask again. "I beg your pardon?"

Byakuya sighed "I can see that this declaration of my intentions has taken you aback. It is understandable, really, since you just confirmed that you do not feel emotional attachment to me, and if I must be honest, I do not feel emotionally attached to you. Not in a romantic sense anyway. I suppose that after my wife died, I've been critical towards relationships, but I know for certain that my…extended friendship with you has nothing to do with the passion I felt for Hisana."

"Then why are you asking me to marry you?" she asked, completely lost

"As I pointed out, life is still moving. Deceivingly slow, but it does. We are not eternal, and we have obligations. Rukia is not ready, nor is she willing to stand as a head of the Kuchiki clan, and unless I produce an heir, the clan would be torn by internal feuds after my death. That is not acceptable, thus I need to marry again so that my children would be legitimate heirs, but so far I have not yet met a woman whom I could marry. You are smart, accomplished and well-mannered, Soi Fong. I promise you that as my wife you will not be obliged to worry about anything. My family has already accepted that my bride cannot be of a noble upbringing, but you are well bred enough for them to accept you. You can practice your profession without worry, you can live in a separate apartment from me, you can even meet with people who I do not know without my consent-you will be left alone to do whatever you wish, for as long as it does not bring dishonor to the family. We do not even have to be…together for a child to be born."

She was gaping at him, her mouth closing and opening-a veritable goldfish throw out of the water. Only this time, the goldfish didn't want to fulfill anybody's wishes, except her own. The more she was looking at him, the angrier did she get. Honestly, that guy offered her marriage when making sure she knew that he knew she didn't love him and that he didn't love her back, and thought that she would accept? She wasn't sure whether her pride had just received the bigger blow, or her dignity. Had Byakuya really lost all faith in womankind after the death of his wife that he was willing to marry the first woman who'd screw him and not want any attachment just to satisfy the needs of his family? Didn't the idiot understand that he was condemning both her and himself to a life in the proverbial Purgatory with such a marriage? In vitro fertilization and separate living arrangements were not all that bad, but…she honestly couldn't imagine how she could live, giving birth to children from a man who she didn't love.

Alright…perhaps Sun-sun's confession had done this to her. A few months ago, the logical Soi Fong, the one who wasn't sporting a budding affection for her female student, the one who was enthusiastically denying that she might perhaps be lesbian, the one that had denounced unsafe love because it was so….unsafe, would have jumped at the opportunity. She could discreetly keep a few boy-toys for her own while not sullying the image of the Kuchiki clan, give birth to a male heir via in vitro, assuring her positions (and she knew she could give birth to a boy, her testosterone levels were so high she was surprised she hadn't grown balls yet), she could live satisfied for the rest of her life and make her parents proud.

However, now she couldn't do it. Not only because her budding affection for Sun-sun had blossomed into something that went far beyond the stalker-like obsession with her body, but she had also actually started considering how could their relationship develop after Sun-sun graduated. Maybe she could get a job in the country where she went studying. With Sun-sun's grades, she could easily go anywhere, and if the country was English-speaking, it would be just perfect. She could tell her she loved her, kiss her, and do other interesting things to her without worrying for getting fired for engaging in an illegal activity with a student.

Marrying Byakuya was unacceptable on more than one levels, firstly because Soi didn't love him and lastly because she was in love with somebody else.

"I'm sorry, Kuchiki-sensei. I cannot accept your offer." She bowed, with all the dignity she could muster.

"May I ask why?" he asked. _Idiot_, she thought. _If you were really smart you'd go on one knee and hope the puppy eyes do the trick._

"I'm in love with someone else. I understand that it was dishonorable of me not to inform you of this until now, but I cannot do anything about my…sentiments."

"I understand." He nodded, total gentleman, before bowing too "Thank you for your time, Soi Fong-sensei."

"If you will accept a piece of advice from me, sensei…" she began, and he looked at her "Do not give up hope just yet. You may not love a woman like you loved your wife, but surely you can make a place in your heart for another one, without having to compare them both."

He nodded again. "Thank you for the advice. Now…" he gestured towards the school "I believe that Yamamoto-sensei was not finished with his briefing."

She followed him, her steps lighter than before. True, it was difficult, but now her heart felt lighter. She had a feeling that it would make Sun-sun happy to hear of this, although her student was bound to hide it when she shared the news.

* * *

**A/N-Ok, ok, I know I promised Sun-sun's dreams coming true and you got a rather crappy chapter, but come on, didn't you guys want her to break up with him ever since they hooked up? I know I did.**

**The TBC scare is over, btw. If you're for me ringing my doctor's neck, review!**


	18. Real sugar

Theme songs: Lune of Notre Dame de Paris and Real Sugar by Roxette

* * *

"_Stupid woman! I should have never picked you up from the street!" _

Sun-sun's eyes snapped open just as her pelvis thrust up, her legs curling protectively in front of her torso. The movement was brisk, unexpected and caused her body to fall over the side of the bed. She barely had time to bring her hands out to soften the landing before she found herself lying gracelessly on the floor, breathless, her eyes open wide and a dull pain settling in her knees and forearms.

It took her a few goes, but when she finally sat up, she was calm. Her heart rate had settled and, by the looks of things, there wasn't another living creature awake in the house. Breathing in weakly, she ran a hand trough her hair and stood up, glancing over at her bedside clock. Five in the morning…well, no point in going back asleep now. She walked towards the bathroom, frowning slightly.

The floor was cold and there was a distinct clatter on the window panels, announcing that autumn was in full swing outside. Sun-sun did her best to ignore the fact that the day would be hellacious, just like she did every morning, before stepping into the shower, knowing full well that whatever pep talk she gave herself wouldn't relieve the stress she was bound to be subjected to. She was one hell of a miserable duckling, and it didn't take a genius to point that out.

Just like the heroine of a teenage drama, Sun-sun could mentally list all the things going wrong in her life to reach the conclusion that she was really messed up. Her family was barely the tip of the iceberg-with them back from Nagasaki, she was hardly ever alone in the house, meaning that she couldn't indulge in her little 'relieving' rituals without risking to be found out. Actually, ever since Tesla had returned suddenly, she had had a bad feeling whenever her hands or thoughts seemed to wander in that direction. She couldn't imagine why he hadn't mentioned that, but she knew that if anyone else caught her they'd be less….ahem…discreet about it. Lupi was just waiting for a reason to tease her, and Loli and Menoli, those shrew-eyed girls, always snooped around people's rooms when they were out. Sun-sun didn't know where did that habit of theirs come from, only that they got a real kick out of reporting to their father the little things that went wrong in the household. Their parents never tried to discourage them from doing that-actually, Sun-sun wasn't sure whether or not Momo indulged into such scavenger hunts herself.

Partly because of her step-mother's unfortunate habit to snoop around, Sun-sun had started faking her period. It wasn't difficult-once in school she stayed behind in the Chemistry lab, working on a project, and she'd managed to concoct in a vial a harmless mixture of water, paint, salt and gelatin, which she spread over pads once a month before binning them in her bathroom trash basket. Yes, it was a little over the top, but her father had gotten a little edgy on the subject of pregnancy since Mila Rose and he didn't miss an opportunity to remind his daughters how important was to remain chaste because, you know, the only safe sex is the one practiced in a monogamous relationship. And that wasn't just a gentle hint for them not to have sex until marriage, no, it was a downright 'you-won't-marry-until-you're-fourty-five-to-a-man-who-can-only-get-it-up-with-the-help-of-the-blue-pill'. Oddly enough, if Aizen Sosuke found out that one of his sons had knocked up a girl, he'd throw him a goddamn party at some bar in Ginza.

Which led to another little problem: with her desire to apply in Oxford and a few other colleges in England (to give myself a few extra points for my application in Todai, she'd said), her father was becoming more and more active in her high school life. He kept calling teachers to make sure she was studying hard and that they encouraged her to pursue her profession as a medic. He kept pressing Lupi to try and catch up on her notes so that it wasn't too obvious she got him in Todai only on her back. He annoyed the whole family with requests to 'do better', frowning especially on Lupi's extravagant after-school clothes and Tesla's drawing. She wasn't a hundred percent sure, but she'd heard that he got into a fight with Nnoitra-sensei about the latter on the last parent-teacher conference. Of course, nobody mentioned it and Soi seemed ignorant of any brawls when she asked her, but Sun-sun still felt the pressure…the atmosphere in the house was downright suffocating, like the one in a mine where the smallest spark can set off an explosion.

And Soi…well…it wasn't like she was acting bad. Actually, whenever they got alone, they got to talk and became very friendly with one another, and she was really kind, but…other than that, nothing seemed to change in her behavior towards her. In class, she didn't look at her more often than she did before summer, or even when they were together, she didn't bring up those two words she'd spoken to her, or the conversation they'd had afterwards.

Strangely, she was feeling disappointed. In what, she didn't know. Maybe she was disappointed that her struggles to get out of the closet and be honest about her feelings were not worth it. Maybe she was disappointed because she had hoped that the stark confession would strengthen Soi Fong's resolve to be honest too, since she obviously cared. Maybe she was disappointed in herself, because she'd assumed that her sensei was the type of person to jump the first student that was willing to spread her legs for her. Yes, she didn't know why, and it was irrelevant.

Which was why she was waiting to get out of home, and, preferably, out of the country. She needed space. Sun-sun nodded to herself, and, for the first time in a while, started preparing calmly for the day.

A noise outside caught her attention and she carefully peeked out the window, trying not to stand in her full height there in case some pervert was wandering around, looking for girls who were just done with their morning shower. No perverts were in sight, but she did see a figure sneak in through the kitchen widow. A girlish figure with short hair and very womanly curves.

Sun-sun frowned and cracked her door open just slightly, waiting for a confirmation of her suspicions. Sure enough, a minute later, a door across form her was open and closed, before the house sighed with sleep again. She waited a little before closing her own door and sighing. "First Loli and Menoli sneak out all the time, and now you too? What's happening with this family?"

* * *

She decided that this was not alright. Later, when the entire breed (sans Wonderwice) was walking to school, Sun-sun made it her objective for the day to confront Apache about it. However, not ten meters from school, she was sidetracked.

"I say she's a dyke." Apache said, in regards to a certain teacher. Sun-sun, who usually blocked out those conversations, suddenly became intrigued.

"No way!" Loli screamed "She is not a dyke! I know!"

"No you don't. I picked up the vibe from her. She's a total lesbo." Apache kept it going, party because it was fun to aggravate that girl. Sun-sun, however, frowned. Not that Apache wasn't right about it, but if she really pick up a vibe about Soi Fong, did she pick one up from her too?

"Well I saw her grinding against a man in a club!" Loli yelled, completely oblivious to the fact that this brought on the question what the hell was she doing in a club in the first place.

"Big woof." Apache rolled her eyes "Dykes always need a beard, remember?"

"I thought that was about gays?" Lupi intervened, causing the two to roll with laughter. But Sun-sun blanched. Who was right then? Apache of Loli? Wait a second, why was she even listening to what her sisters were saying?

Since that conversation pretty much took up all her attention, she never had the chance to call Apache on her little act last night, and before she even remembered about it, her sister had gone into class and she had to do the same as well. The day passed into a blur as Sun-sun either stressed out over yet _another_ potential family scandal or stared at the back of Soi Fong, wondering if Loli had actually been right and she wasn't letting her down easy.

It would make the most sense, wouldn't it? Worried, Sun-sun staggered down the hall towards the doctor's office, her head buzzing with thoughts the whole time. She was just reaching for the handle when someone inside gasped loudly. Surprised, she listened to the quiet sniffles that came from inside for a full minute before she dared crack the door open and peek inside. On the cot lie Inoue Orihime, almost choking on her tears, while Ulqiorra-sensei was rubbing her back soothingly.

"Care to join us, Sun-sun?" he asked, his voice just notch more acid than it usually was "If not, please be kind enough to close the door, the room will get cold."

"I apologize, sensei." She mumbled as she staggered inside. "What is wrong, Inoue-san?" she asked as she approached the crying girl carefully. Orihime just wailed louder and buried her head in the pillow.

"High school…" Ulquiorra replied evenly while he gestured her to get out of her school jacket and put on the white coat she usually wore in the office "Teenagers are petty and silly, Sun-sun. I'm so glad you're not." He gave her a meaningful look and just shook his head when Orihime continued to shake on the cot "Apparently our favorite school blog has somehow made the news and somebody called her home today to ask if she was indeed the girl mentioned there. And if that wasn't bad enough, somebody also got a phone call because Kuchiki Byakuya stormed into Rukia-san's class and dragged her home by the hair, or so her friends told Orihime." His nose wrinkled "And there were some unsavory adjectives sprinkled throughout the rant. I didn't get most of them."

Sun-sun sighed as she sat down on the other side of the cot. Of course, what would life be without complications, really? Apparently, some concerned parent did his daily snoop through his child's computer and found the Chronicles web page, and not only had he been shocked to find that his own flesh and blood would pay so much to read that, he immediately made the connection and decided to report this to the news. Not the school but the news. Talk about plausibility. That parent must either be dumb or horribly unpractical-Soi had mentioned already that the phones in the offices were ringing off the hook, and now apparently the journalists were investigating.

So the two classes were currently

split into two-the side that supported Rukia, and subsequently, Ichigo, and the other-Orihime. Unfortunately Orihime had just been confronted by the former. If people reacted to a simple love triangle like that, she didn't want to think what would happen if they actually did figure out that she and Soi Fong were…whatever they were. So far, the mysterious journalist hadn't gotten in on them, thus developing the teacher on teacher plotline like the cheesy Cinderella story it was. She just had to hope it would stay that way.

* * *

Inoue Sora came to pick her up, and after exchanging a few quick words with Ulquiorra, he carried her off. Sun-sun watched the doctor walk around the room, shuffling through boxes and huffing angrily at himself. "People nowadays…" He growled "We're all trying to fit in better, but the slightest disturbance in our order makes us condemn and point fingers. I swear, if half of this happened to any of them, they wouldn't want it to happen to anyone, but since we're all straight laced, we would never let that happen. And so what? Some trivial high school drama will make the news and send people into a fit of rage. How could this happen? Who would allow that? Why would that girl act so foolishly? I don't even know, and I'm still sympathizing with her."

"Sensei, it will be alright. Inoue-san will graduate with me in the Spring-she won't have to handle so much pressure once she's in the University."

"She tried starving herself to death when Ichigo and Kuchiki-san got together-how do you see her surviving until Spring?"

"Surely she must realize that she's acting foolish." Sun-sun said resolutely, although her heart clenched. She wasn't any different than Orihime from a few months ago-she was aware that she might lose the one she loved, indefinitely, and she couldn't imagine what would happen to her if it happened. The affection she held for Soi Fong had already changed her, she thought, for the better-what would become of this passionate, resolute girl if her goal was taken away. However, Soi Fong had once chosen her over Kuchiki Byakuya, a man who could provide her with a living, a house, wealth, a 'beard' if she needed it. That gave her some hope.

"Kurosaki chose, and just like her, he had feelings for Rukia-san he could not ignore. It was hard and it was painful, but once she gets over it, she'll be able to move on."

"And you're absolutely sure about this because…?" he drawled, eyeing her up and down.

"I'm not sure. I'm just expressing an opinion."

"So, do tell, does Soi Fong make you feel so secure then?"

Sun-sun flushed. "Sensei! I never said it was Soi Fong-san! Please be more respectful towards your colleagues!"

Ulquiorra eyed her up and down, before explaining flatly: "I will talk of my colleagues as I see fit and you didn't have to tell me. Seeing you so flustered just seals the deal." Sun-sun blushed. He sighed. "Don't be mortified, child. You didn't do anything to betray whatever confidence you have with her. However, you didn't start thinking about love until after she arrived, and you are with her on daily basis-from all our talk and the…" he spat the next words "…_recent events_, it was easy for me to deduce that it might be her."

"You don't condemn me, then…" Sun-sun mumbled, the beginnings of hope starting to blaze up in her chest.

"Child, I presented you and gave you access to materials that can be considered pornographic at best. Well, by the ones whom you are afraid of, anyway. I knew perfectly well what was happening, although you wouldn't give details and I expected something shocking. Besides, I suppose that it's human fate to fall in love with one's teacher at some point."

"Of all the people I know, I least thought you'd be condescending, Ulquiorra-sensei." She said dryly

"I'm stating a fact, Sun-sun. I wasn't referring to you in specific. Besides, society will always laugh at some student's infatuation with their teacher…as long as the teacher doesn't respond to it." he gave her a meaningful look

"I only told her how I felt a while ago. She didn't do anything." Sun-sun flushed angrily. He was going to call her on the bluff…damn it! She prepared for the humiliation, but nothing came out. Instead, Ulquiorra just raised an eyebrow.

"Surely, she must've said something." He prompted

"She said that she accepts my feelings but she couldn't reciprocate them right now. I'm starting to think that she's trying to let me down easy." She said with frustration "She wouldn't even touch me."

"Did you actually expect that?" he laughed coldly "She is your teacher, for god's sake, Sun-sun. You might be eighteen, but you're still virtually a minor, a student, and you live with your parents. Don't you think they might not take it well?"

"Of course they won't. I'd never tell them!"

"Never?"

"Never!"

"Yet they will find out." Ulquiorra pointed out "And it won't get better. Why are you so angry with her for trying to maintain a sense of propriety in this situation? If this ever comes out, you won't be reprimanded either way because no matter what you do, until you graduate…hell, until you finish college, and even after that, there will always be people who will consider you an impressionable doll who is to do as any authority figure bids her." She opened her mouth to object, but he cut her off "You know it's like that, Sun-sun. You've been submissive all your life. You've given into your father's will in order to make things easier and you've modulated your lifestyle after the one he has intended for you. You can't blame people for stating a fact. Soi Fong will take all the blame should things turn nasty and you need to understand that she has a lot more to lose than people's good opinion of her."

Yes…

Why should she be disappointed? Did she honestly think that just taking the leap and coming out into the light would make things perfect and easy for them? Right now, both were staggering underneath the pressure of senior year, not to mention the fact that they were sharing the secret of Sun-sun's communicating with her mother. Yes…how could she have possibly thought that just because she told her sensei that she loves her, and, more importantly, that she didn't shoot her down, that everything would be summer and roses from now on. For one thing, although Sun-sun didn't like her father much, just thinking how angry, how bitter, how disappointed he'd be when he found out made her feel sick for ever being so eager to turn into her new self.

Ulquiorra seemed to understand when the realization had sunk in. He leaned back on his chair, lost in his thoughts, as Sun-sun excused herself, gathered her things and bolted for the door.

* * *

The practice had been good, Soi Fong thought as Sun-sun padded out of the showers. Nobody had been hurt, nobody had asked questions, and Kuchiki-sensei had been absent. She knew that it was all a little break before the storm, but she was fine for as long as she didn't see him. For now…

"Sensei?" Sun-sun appeared at the doorstep "You're woolgathering again."

"Am I?" Soi quickly turned the shower off and reached for a towel. Why, she didn't know, but somehow lately she felt embarrassed to be completely naked around Sun-sun. The latter probably understood that as well, because when Soi covered herself up, she frowned slightly:

"Sensei, I won't jump you." She joked, smiling slightly. Soi immediately became flustered

"I know that, Sun-sun. I just feel cold is all." She looked at her "Sorry, I didn't mean it to sound so…off."

"That's alright." Sun-sun smiled "I was a little worried about it earlier before, but now it's fine. You have a lot of things to think about, don't you, sensei."

"Yes." Soi breathed a sigh of relief, before smiling at Sun-sun "Thank you for being so patient with me. I'm usually much quicker to turn people off."

Sun-sun shrugged. "I guess it can't be helped. You wouldn't be able to go anywhere with me if you're locked up in prison."

Soi laughed. "Yeah, you could say that…" she hadn't noticed that Sun-sun moved in closer, eyeing her face speculatively "Sun-chan?"

"No-thing…" the younger girl winked, before stepping in to place a soft peck on her lips. For a split second, Soi froze, completely shocked, and Sun-sun pulled away, an apologetic smile on her face "Happy Halloween, sensei." She added with a wink, before quickly throwing her clothes on and leaving with a little wave of her hand. Soi just stood there, dumbstruck, unable to process anything but a single thought.

_Her lips tasted like cherries._

A/N-Happy Halloween!

* * *


	19. Rush

**So, this is the next chapter...again, not exactly how I envisioned it, but hell, it's a lot longer than I expected it. **

**Be sure to check out hte author's note below, it's important.**

**Theme song for today: Rush by Ali and Aj (Honest, does ANYONE listen to these songs or am I just wasting my time writing them?)**

* * *

A month later Sun-sun got an invitation for an interview from Oxford. Naturally, dropping the bomb into the Aizen household was nothing if not spectacular. The parents locked themselves with Sun-sun in the study (now dubbed the Torture Chamber), while all the younger siblings, including baby Wonderwice lined up with glasses pressed to their ears, listening. Apparently, straight-laced Momo was less than eager to hear of her step-daughter's success.

"This isn't an actual acceptance." She said, staring at the letter "It's a mere interview invitation."

"As one of the leading institutions in higher education in the world, this much is considered and honor." Sun-sun pointed out patiently while ignoring the urge to sink her teeth in her stepmother's throat "It would be considered foolish to turn it down."

"Sun-sun, you have no saying in this. Didn't you insist that we should apply just to make you more interesting for Todai?"

"Momo!" Aizen stopped her in mid-rant "Let us not jump to conclusions. We must make the most of this opportunity." Actually, Sun-sun could practically see the little wheels rolling under her father's skull. While Todai was one of the most hard to get in schools in the world, and the most expensive, it took people a little time to pinpoint it, while Oxford was known throughout the world. Suddenly, Tokyo University wasn't on top of the priority list, and Oxford was actually an option. She couldn't help but feel gleeful at the effect this piece of news had on him. Especially since this was the perfect opportunity to take Luppi, a lazy hog with no prospects or wishes for success, and turn him into the epitome of a super achiever. There was no way in hell he would sleaze off in Great Britain, even if he was thousands of miles away from home. Even Luppi couldn't blow something like this off. And if he did, he still had his super smart and hard working sister to pull him out of the mud.

"I think that we should let Sun-sun go to the interview." He finally said "Now, Momo…" he raised his hand when his wife tried to counter him "I understand this is a big step, but I assure you, it may work out quite well." He squeezed her hand "England offers many prospects. Luppi and Sun-sun could do quite well."

Momo's face suddenly lit up. Apparently, she had forgotten about the whole twins go to the same school bit of the bargain. Too bad neither Loli nor Menoly was smart enough to bring the other to a prestigious school, Sun-sun thought bitterly. But then again, wasn't this every stepmother's dream come true? Get the annoying foster children out of the way so that her babies got all the attention.

Her last resort was that Sun-sun could not go since there was no-one to accompany her. Aizen was too busy at work, December being the most crucial time for the signing of contracts and closing the deals, and Momo herself would never get on a plane with her stepdaughter, let alone spend a whole week in her company. And leaving the rest of the kids to their own devices was hardly the reason for that-ever since she'd known Sun-sun, since she had been her kindergarten teacher, she had been terrified of her. Working around kids had prepared her to deal with temper tantrums and caprices. Sun-sun had been always quiet, lost in her thoughts, yet she had always been alert and responsive to stimuli.

Seeing such maturity in the behavior of a little girl had frightened her. And seeing that this behavior didn't weaver through adolescence, it was safe to say that Momo's love for Aizen Sosuke could only rival the hatred she felt for Sun-sun. Getting her out of her hair was never more of a priority, and, as soon as she heard that the school was starting winter break early on account of a flu epidemic, Aizen Momo, nee Hinamori, was more than glad to let her stepdaughter travel with her homeroom teacher to Britain.

It was even better when Soi offered to pay for Sun-sun's ticket and her own. Momo accepted before she even considered asking her husband about it, and was pleased to give her stepdaughter just about enough money for the hotel and food. And souvenirs. Never forget the souvenirs.

"They are insufferable." She mumbled as she and Soi boarded the plane on the bitter December morning. It was going to be a long day-the flight left early, and it would take more than twelve hours before it landed in Luton, London. And then they would have to travel by bus another two hours before they made it to Oxford. It was cold, it was snowing, and since the plane took off at 6 in the morning, none of her brothers and sister, or even her father, had been up to see her off. Soi had thankfully gotten the cab driver to go past her house to pick her up-she couldn't imagine what she would've done on the bus.

"I thought you were happy they let you go. Especially when they allowed me to accompany you." Soi Fong pointed out as she moved swiftly to their seat and disposed their carry-ons in the storage space above. She only left a couple of books out of her bag-apparently, even in the morning, she was going to read and do work. Sun-sun could only admire her for that…well, and the fact that she let her have the window seat.

"That's not what I meant. Momo-san shouldn't have made you pay as if it was your responsibility." It wasn't necessary to keep their voices down over the roar of the engines-all around them, people were pulling out blankets and pillows and hitting down a shot of vodka to sleep through the flight. As far as the other passengers were concerned, they would have two lesbians make out not ten feet from them and they wouldn't notice. Sun-sun was definitely not going to try and catch up on any sleep.

To her surprise, Soi just smiled and leaned in to pinch her cheek "Maybe some day it will." Before pulling her 'Complete Works of John Keats' out and working her way through "Lamia". "And by the way, Sun-chan, please try to get some sleep before we get there. I know travel can be tiring as Hell, but trust me, you'll want to be fully awake to take in the new experiences."

"I don't want to." She said stubbornly "Here we are and you're not being patronizing for once. How can I not take advantage of that?"

Soi thought about it for a while, before snapping Keats closed and stuffing it in the compartment in the seat in front of them. Wow…she actually listened to her? A little more and Sun-sun was going to start suspecting something. Soi had been rather strange ever since Sun-sun had gotten her invitation. She'd been making lots of phone calls too…and this, coming from a woman whose parents barely paid attention and who wasn't friends with anyone, was weird to say the least.

Well, not that Sun-sun hadn't been her old self during the past month. She had taken up the opportunity to stare at Soi in the shower and give her quick, chaste pecks on the lips before she darted off home. Never did these little…indulgences go any further than simple skin-on-skin contact, because Sun-sun was too nervous to try and stay for more than a second and Soi would never make it longer.

However, if she'd cared to wait for her dumbfound teacher to get out of the trance, she would've seen her smile warmly and laugh.

Soi hadn't really been faring all that good. The Chronicles, that were, somehow, still throwing all the shit out from under the carpet on the net were gathering unwanted attention still, from the small television channel as well as the principal. Yamamoto had exclusively called all the teachers to give them a stern talking to, about relationships between each other no less. Soi knew he had been addressing to everyone, but his eyes fell on her more times than she cared to count. Did he know? Did Byakuya tell him? Well, she definitely couldn't ask him, because he'd fire her ass, and Byakuya himself wasn't much of a help either.

Since he'd proposed (and she'd refused) he'd treated her with nothing but cold civility, and it had somehow spread on Unohana as well. Of course, the biology teacher didn't know about their little summer fling (How could she? Unless, of course, Byakuya told her everything, like what's-his-name from "Some Kind of Wonderful" told Watts everything.), but since Byakuya and Soi couldn't make a conversation anymore, it didn't seem appropriate for them to get together anymore. Soi, sensing that it was better if she pulled back, didn't call her, though it was a shame-between all the crazy things happening in that school and Sun-sun, Unohana Retsu was probably the best person to talk to.

Ulquiorra was definitely not a suitable replacement (given that you could possibly replace Unohana's gentle attitude and her sense). Whenever she came to see him, she found Orihime Inoue on the cot, sleeping or talking to him, and he looked like he was about to be institutionalized…or just gotten out of the nut house. Honestly, what was with people nowadays? Gone was the composed, rational bastard that had taken Soi to sushi and gently hinted about the horrors that were about to ensue. Instead, she face a stuttering fool on a regular basis. Soi never thought she'd say it, but she missed the bastard-at least he was something she could handle.

She was definitely not continuing her contract. If Sun-sun got into Oxford, she was moving to England. She could get a job somewhere, even if it meant working at a grocery store. Crazy students, crazy parents and batshit crazy tutors…it was just like her college years-it was suitable for some point in one's life, but not something you'd like to face every freaking day.

Soi snuck a peek at the girl next to her. Sun-sun truly was a beautiful child-luxurious black hair, pale skin, perfectly feminine little hands…And the eyes! She could look at them for hours, studying the pale violet irises, trying to decipher all the emotions that ran through them. Her student was very often composed, quiet and aloof…until something set her off and her entire body would betray her passion. Soi wondered if she could ever be truly undone before her…and then she slipped back into her little world.

* * *

During the flight, they mostly attempted to be discreet. More often than not, somebody would walk down the path towards the bathrooms and the two would let go of each other's hand, slightly annoyed. Sun-sun quickly learned to fake sleep in order to rest her head on Soi's shoulder, and read the lines her sensei couldn't read to her herself. A couple of times the flight attendants would breeze by, asking if there was anything they could help them with. At some point, the girl was afraid that they were disapproving of them, until one of them actually tried to strike a conversation with Soi Fong.

Surprised, the girl opened her eyes and, though such a display wasn't like her, stared openly at the flight attendant and then at Soi. And then it hit her-her sensei didn't look like a woman at all. Which wasn't much of a revelation, really-since the first day at school, she had always dressed in a way that was not only conservative, but it boarded with cross-dressing. Not once had Sun-sun seen her wear a skirt, and her baggy shirts and pants always had people confused at first about her sex.

But she had never really thought Soi did it on purpose, not until now. Raking her eyes over her teacher's simple ensemble, black jeans and a gray sweater, Sun-sun couldn't help but feel really stupid.

"Did I ever tell you I love you?" Sun-sun whispered in her ear when the flight attendant went to harass someone else. Soi turned to look at her, confusion written all over her face. Her student just smiled, reaching over to pull her glasses down from her face and smolder away her sharp bangs. The luscious black braids, the only giveaway for Soi's gender, were tucked back carefully and almost indistinguishable in the seat.

"You did." Soi replied, her voice equally quiet. "Though I'm surprised you're bringing this up now."

"I was just thinking how silly I am." Sun-sun replied, looking out the window. Her sensei squeezed her hand reassuringly, though she was rather confused about her outburst. "When the term started…" Sun-sun leaned over again, blushing as she whispered "I couldn't understand why you wouldn't show any affection. I wondered if you didn't want to let me down easy. And then…just now…I realized that I was being stupid to think that you're perfect too." She finished, nodding towards the clothes Soi wore.

Surprisingly, she figured it out immediately. Letting out a small laugh, she pinched Sun-sun's cheek again. "You're right, little one. Completely right." Sighing, she continued "Actually, I'm happy. We're all flawed and aware of that-you in your inexperience and I in my history. It's important that you see me as the person I am."

"For all ten seconds." Sun-sun stated morosely.

"It's a start." Soi looked around before leaning gently into Sun-sun "You have no idea what it's like to be deceived by your expectations, Sun-chan, but it's better that you don't. When I first met Yoruichi-san, with the way I had been raised and the way we were introduced, I felt as if I was in the presence of a Goddess…or a princess at least."

"And she wasn't?" up to this point, Sun-sun hadn't been too interested in her mother's…wife. Marriage does that-it makes people believe that the people involved are totally devoted to one another and no possible threat. See any soap opera that can come out. Soi herself always said she didn't have much faith in the institution of marriage. Still…did she really need to know? There wasn't a big chance that she would meet Yoruichi soon, and her mother hadn't been able to tell much about her in her letters.

"Yoruchi-sama is like a cat." Soi replied evenly "She is strong and powerful and independent. She doesn't do anything she does not want to do. The downside of this is that she never feels obliged to take care of the wreckage she causes in other people's lives. She goes away, moves on, and leaves her loved ones broken and confused."

* * *

The plane nodded and the usual hullabaloo followed-gathering bags, going through customs (their line was relatively small), and of course, finding their way out of the airport. Soi was quick, but Sun-sun stopped every ten paces to make sure she didn't lose anything and look around in surprise.

"Sun-sun…" Soi was calling for the umpteenth time, before a loud cry echoed throughout the area

"SOI-CHAN!" Sun-sun looked up to find Soi getting nearly mauled over by a tall woman with dark skin. Before any of them could react, she squeezed the startled teacher to herself.

"Yo-yoruichi-sama, let go of me this instant…." Soi choked out from somewhere between the woman's breasts.

"Huh?" she blinked goofily, before letting go and offering an embarrassed grin to the room in general "Sorry, Soi-chan, I just…" she grabbed her in a hug again "I JUST MISSED YOU SO MUCH!"

"LET GO OF ME!" Soi roared and pushed back "Have some decency, Yoruichi-sama."

"Yare, yare, don't be such a spoilsport." Yoruichi pretended to crouch like a cat about to pounce, before she noticed the girl staring at them, slack-jawed "Sun-chan! You're Sun-chan, right!" Before the girl could even muster a full sentence, she was the (un)lucky recipient of another hug. "Aaah, I've been waiting since forever to meet you!"

"Can't….breathe…" Sun-sun mumbled weakly as her feet dangled off the ground

"Yoruichi-sama!" Soi chided in her best teacher voice

"Yoruichi-san…" a quiet voice said "Please don't make a scene."

All three women froze on spot, and then a second later, the death grip on Sun-sun's body loosened enough for the young girl to take a little breath and open her eyes.

"You guys are no fun." Yoruichi whined when she finally set her down "Hi there, my name is Shihoin Yoruichi and I'm your mother's new wife. Pleased to meet you!"

"Still rash as ever, Yoruichi." Soi said, patting Sun-sun's shoulder gently. Her student eyed her, before looking at the two women before her. Both were tall, tan and gorgeous. Although it had been years since she'd last seen Halibel, Sun-sun immediately recognized her. But instead of looking at her, her eyes were continuously drawn to the woman by her side

Shihoin Yoruichi…she'd heard of her, she'd even seen pictures, but nothing, absolutely nothing could compare to meeting her in person. Actually, had she not known beforehand that Yoruichi and Soi Fong had been friends, Sun-sun would've never, ever thought that they knew each other…hell, she wouldn't have guessed that they were from the same planet. If Soi was shy about her looks, Yoruichi practically screamed self-confidence. Even though it was the dead of winter outside, she wore a costume with a short skirt and a cream-colored jacket, the shirt underneath unbuttoned enough to hint for the heaving bosom underneath. Long, violet locks fell down all the way to the small of her back. The gentle curls were in a contrast with the sharp bangs that framed her face, but they emphasized on the beauty of her eyes-a beautiful, rich gold that could outshine the sun.

The only thing that could rival their brilliance was the toothy grin which, apparently, Yoruichi didn't need an occasion to use. Right now, she was smiling at her, and Sun-sun couldn't help but tug on her plaid skirt, wishing she didn't look like such a schoolgirl.

If her young lover was having a hard time meeting her new stepmother, then Soi was probably roasting on a slow fire as she was having a stare down with Halibel. Yoruichi's wife, while barely having spoken a full sentence, obviously had an authorative presence, with her budging belly and disapproving scowl. Soi, although she was already 27 and a teacher, felt as if she was in the first grade and under the careful scrutiny of her parents after she brought home an F.

Though now, at least, one of the great mysteries of her life had been solved-she finally figured out from where Sun-sun got her good looks. Halibel was just as tanned as Yoruichi, but her hair, brows and eyelashes were a blinding blond, not a dark blue as her old friend's. It was pulled back to reveal a perfectly lovely face, with soft features and eyes the color of a winter sky. She even had the same pout as Sun-sun, although her student had never used it on her directly.

"Like what you see?" Yoruichi broke the silence with a chuckle. Sun-sun blushed a bright scarlet and Soi squeezed her shoulder sympathetically

"She's always like this." She offered Halibel an understanding smile...and the older woman didn't return it. Oh, boy.

"Well, let's not stand here looking like cuckoo birds, we've got to blow this joint!" Yoruichi grinned broadly, grabbed Sun-sun by the hand and dragged her towards the exit.

Soi, in spite of not having seen her friend in nearly a decade, was surprisingly quick to slip into their old routine. Yoruichi would instigate everything and she would drag in the back, fixing the mess. This time she grabbed both her and Sun-sun's luggage and hurried to catch up with them outside, where Yoruichi was pushing Sun-sun on the front seat of a silver Mercedes. Halibel had already sat comfortably on the back…guess where that left Soi.

"Yoruichi-san, not that I'm complaining, but…" Soi began, but her old friend just opened the trunk and helped her toss in the things.

"Now, now, Soi-chan." Yoruichi chided "I know that you're in a hurry to catch up and that Hali-chan also wants to talk to Sun-chan, but I wanna get to know her too. So sit in the back and enjoy the ride, we're going to London to ride the Eye before we go anywhere."

Four lesbians riding in a car…

Two of them are mother and daughter, and the other two are childhood friends.

One of the childhood friends is an infamous party girl who doesn't like to keep her mouth shut and has often referred to the other as 'the one that got away'.

The daughter has a serious crush on one of her teachers and the mother is already aware of that.

The daughter was riding out front with a stepmother that is a little too eager to know her and the teacher was riding out back with the rather disapproving mother.

Something told Soi that this wasn't going to end so well.

* * *

**A/N-Do you like crack pairings? Do you love writing? Do you love bashing Hinamori Momo? Then check out the Christmas/Easter Fic Challenge my friend Kristine and I made. Just go on my profile, find the 'My forums' link somewhere between my homepage and mail, and find the forum entitled "From Christmas to Easter, let's write stories together!" Link, if it shows up: www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/myforums/Five_seas/1426411/ **

**Please give it a shot. If you don't feel like it, there's a whole theme about bashing Bedwetter Momo, so it's a win-win. **

**And reivew, damn it, or I'm going to sulk *pout***


	20. Prelude 23 5

**Theme song-Rachmaninoff Prelude op. 23 no. 5**

* * *

It was definitely a day of firsts. Either this was a very weird turn of events, or it was a very carefully conducted one. If the latter, Yoruichi was definitely not letting her snap out of her trance for long enough to think about it, Sun-sun decided. Her new stepmother was firing question after question throughout their entire drive to London, and she barely had time to keep up with her words to give a coherent answer. By the time they were looking for a parking lot in Britain's capital, they had already gone through her entire life, her academic career and her friends in school.

The backseat had been conspicuously quiet, and whenever she turned around to look, she caught Halibel smiling at her warmly, and Soi Fong looking edgy, but pleased. Both women nodded at her encouragingly, giving her strength to hold up her part of the conversation with dignity.

Actually, Yoruichi wasn't half bad. She was funny and energetic and quite exciting too. It was a refreshing change from her family, her class, everyone in Japan who were so stiff. Whenever they stopped for gas or to pick up something to eat (which, with Halibel was quite often), Sun-sun would catch her sensei smiling wistfully before she had to snap out of it and make sure Yoruichi didn't cause trouble. It made her wonder what kind of relationship had those two had before. Soi had told her only vaguely of their childhood together, of their 'friendship', and now that she had seen the Shihoin Goddess in the flesh, suspicions about the meaning of 'friendship' for Soi started to emerge….suspicions that she had scarcely allowed herself to hold.

Until they got to London, she had barely exchanged decent greetings and an awkward hug with Halibel, and not a full sentence with Soi. Not that either looked very upset with it. Halibel seemed to savor the moment, while Soi was grateful for the distraction Yoruichi provided. The tension she felt when she first met Halibel still hadn't dissipated and she wasn't sure if she wanted to face whatever she had in mind. Sun-sun could only guess that her sensei was feeling uneasy in the company of her over-exuberant friend, but it was nothing in comparison to the feelings she herself was facing towards Halibel, the person she'd barely spoken to. She knew that they would have to talk, and soon, and she wanted to, but how to start? What could she possibly tell a woman who she hadn't met in nearly fifteen years?

* * *

The three quickly made their way to the river, with Yoruichi babbling along the way how cool it would be for them to ride the infamous Ferris Wheel and then go to find a cruise down the river.

"Perhaps, Yoruichi-sama…" Soi cut her in mid-ramble, placing her hand on Sun-sun's shoulder "You would like to postpone your plans for the cruise for a warmer weather? The dead of winter is hardly the best time to go down an icy river."

"Ah, such a spoilsport…" Yoruichi whined, ruffling Soi's hair slightly "But you're right, though. We can do this sometime else. Besides, Sun-sun-chan's interview is the day after tomorrow, right? We need to drive there, don't we?"

"It is very good of you to think of that." Soi replied sarcastically

"Oh, well, we still get to ride the London Eye!" Yoruichi beamed, wrapping an arm around Halibel and kissing her soundly on the lips. Sun-sun blushed, her eyes going as wide as saucers at the display of attention. What was more, almost nobody around them bothered to throw the two women a second glance…or stopped to look, for that matter. It seemed almost…natural. Looking over to her teacher, Sun-sun was surprised to find Soi shaking her head with something akin to exasperation.

"Sensei?"

"Civil partnership for same-sex couples was introduced in 2005 in the UK." Soi explained, understanding her student's question immediately "Marriage isn't performed as a rite, but it is accepted when performed in countries such as Spain who have legalized it. Besides, there aren't laws against it, so people are more used to it."

"Oh…" Sun-sun blushed "That explains a lot."

"Don't feel uneasy." Her sensei gave her a reassuring smile "Just enjoy the relative freedom for a while."

"Do I have a choice? If I don't, I think Yoruichi-san will make me have fun." She sighed sourly. Soi gave her an awkward hug and the younger girl leaned in, wrapping her arm around her waist to keep her in place. "I could have used the warning, sensei."

"Yeah….so would I." came the reply, followed by a chaste kiss on the top of her head. When the two pulled apart, Sun-sun buried her face in the lapels of her coat and turned to look at the river. Soi tried doing the same, but caught sight of Halibel watching them with the corner of her eye. Something in that look told her that trouble would ensue.

* * *

Halibel and Sun-sun had time to catch up while Soi and Yoruichi were waiting in line to get tickets for the ride. Since there was always a big crash of people, that took some time, and the two friends could talk a little in relative privacy.

"So, to think that we'd end up falling for a mother and a daughter." The dark-skinned woman interrupted the silence, a wide smile on her face.

"You never beat around the bush, do you?" Soi glared at her friend "Couldn't you have breached the topic at a less crowded place…or any more delicately?"

"Come on, Soi!" Yoruichi rolled her eyes "The more loudly you talk about something, the less people want to listen. It's when you drop your voice and act all mysterious that they try to eavesdrop."

"Cut off the Megan McCafferty quotes!" the small woman chided "And what do you mean by falling. The relationship I have with Sun-sun is nothing like the one you have with your wife." Unfortunately, she thought as they moved another meter or so.

"Ah, my little bee, you feel the tension building up. You wanna touch her, but you can't…" as always, she saw right through her friend. Soi scowled and looked away "I can give you tips, you know. Such a pity you never took me up on my offer before you went to Sodom and Gomorra, you would've used the experience."

"Will you stop with your boisterousness?!" she snapped. Yoruichi blinked, taken aback by her vehemence "You haven't changed for all ten years, have you? You still think that you're above everyone else! I can't believe I actually thought you'd overgrown that…childishness in you!"

"Get that stick out of your ass already!" Came the haughty answer "I was merely trying to make you at ease. It's obviously a very touchy subject for you if you start to snap at the very mention of sex."

"You have an incredibly high opinion of yourself, don't you?" Soi snorted "Not all of us can jump the people we care about immediately. I'm so sick of having to explain this."

"Oh? You've been doing a lot of explaining then?"

"Yes. No." she groaned "It's complicated. I'm obviously not going off sharing my problems with everyone on the street, but I have a hard time coming to terms with it for myself. And for Sun-sun…well…"

"Still the old Soi." she rolled her eyes "You're such a coward."

"Go fuck yourself, Yoruichi."

"I don't need to do that, you know. But you're very wrong if you think that I haven't had a hard time with Halibel, convincing her to try and open up." Yoruichi countered "You've seen her ex, right?" when Soi nodded, the mocha-skinned woman gave a very un-ladylike snort and her eyes narrowed menacingly "Controlling, oppressive asshole. Treated her like shit while sleeping with her kid's kindergarten teacher, can you believe that? It took all her courage to stand up to him and tell him to shove it, and then get her divorce, and then he totally destroyed whatever feeling of self-confidence she had left. Nobody helped her and she ended up not being able to see her kids. She was completely devastated."

Yoruichi sighed and Soi snuck a peek at the mother and daughter. Sun-sun was showing her some pictures and Halibel looked like she was about to burst into tears. Touching…

"Yoruichi-sama, do you think that this was a good idea then? Would this be good for her and the baby?" Soi asked timidly

"Would this be good for Sun-sun at such a crucial time?" the older woman retorted

"She told me that she would like to know her mother, whatever she was."

"Hali-chan feels the same." Yoruichi smiled "And besides, she needs to see that Aizen hasn't ruined the kids."

"Speaking of kids, how did you convince your father to let you pull it off? Getting married to another woman and have a child with her?"

"Ah, that…Let's just say he was desperate for a successor to the clan and I have a very frail body." She swooned, a hand over her eyes, and batted her eyelashes for emphasis. Soi rolled her eyes, remembering all the times Yoruichi ended up breaking her leg in their sparring matches when they were kids "I got a doctor to explain to him that my bones will not be able to handle carrying a child and I needed someone else to do this for me. Then I found this industrial magnate who used to be very good to me and also didn't have children, and we arranged for meeting hours and all sixty-nine yards of it…so we got my egg and his stuff and Hali-chan is now carrying the result."

"And he didn't mind it one bit? Marrying her, that is?"

"Pffff, no. There are hardly people I can marry to make the Shihoin family any more powerful, so he let it go. Besides, he has this phallus-centric idea that two women can't possibly be in love with each other, so he thinks he'll be sitting this whim of mine off too. Needless to say he's in for a long wait." Yoruichi laughed when she teetered to the register and asked the man for four tickets.

* * *

The drive to Oxford was decidedly less loud, with Yoruichi finally having settled down. She even let Sun-sun ride with Halibel out back and the silence in the car was filled with the quiet hum of their conversation. When they reached their hotel and Yoruichi calmly requested a double for two women, the woman at the reception didn't even bat an eyelash and handed them a key. Since Soi had already made a reservation for a room with two beds, they had to separate for a while, but just as the two were about to head off, Yoruichi called after them.

"Soi-chan, sorry to be a bother, but can you please help Halibel with her bags? I'll be right back." The dark-skinned woman yelled as she sped off towards the car. Sun-sun shared a confused glance with her teacher, before shrugging and urging her to hurry on.

Sighing, Soi quickly went in her role of a pack mule and picked up the bags, following Halibel towards the elevator. The older woman didn't say anything while they were waiting, but once inside, she calmly leaned over and pushed the "stop" button. Soi Fong turned towards her, eyes wide, but Halibel didn't appear the least bit flustered. Her hands were crossed calmly over her budging belly and she was looking straight ahead, when she said:

"While we were alone, I was hoping that we have a little…heart to heart, sensei."

"Of course." Soi mumbled, balancing the bag on her shoulder to ease the pressure "I'm glad to have finally met you in person, Shihoin-san…"

"Halibel. You call Yoruichi by her name, there is no need for such formality." Halibel stated coldly "I'm also glad to meet you. I've been wondering what kind of person you are ever since my wife showed me your letter. None of my children's tutors ever tried contacting me, especially after they met my former husband."

"You can say I don't have so much to fear as them." Soi replied and kicked herself mentally. Was that something you said to your beloved's mother? Damn it!

"Yes, you most certainly don't." the blonde replied. Soi considered pushing the button again, but she knew well enough that there was no getting out of that elevator until Halibel said what she wanted to say "Please, do not delude yourself, Soi Fong-san. My situation does not make me any more sympathetic towards you. I will not approve of you simply because you support me and not my husband."

"I've not…"

"Please. I do not approve of you…nor will you ever receive approval until I can make sure you will not hurt Sun-sun."

Soi felt her cheeks heat up with indignation, but she was determined to hold out until the end. Surely, Halibel had had lots of unpleasant experiences in the past, and with her it must've been very difficult to come to terms with reality. She had all the reasons to be weary for Sun-sun.

But the presumptuousness that SHE of all people could hurt her. She, who did so much to help Sun-sun. She, who practically brought her here…not that she could take credit for Sun-sun's achievements, but still, if it hadn't been for her, she wouldn't have taken the chance. Alright, alright…maybe she was a little too defensive. And Halibel hadn't even started.

"Who does that woman think she is?" Halibel asked in a mock tone "That's what you're thinking, right? I've seen my daughter for the first time in fifteen years only a few hours ago and I'm already becoming defensive." The blonde let out a thin smile "You should know, I never wanted to let my children go."

Heaving a sigh, Soi pressed the button and the elevator set itself into motion. "I am not passing judgment on you. I don't know what happened between you and Aizen Sosuke to say if you did the right thing or not."

"Yes…" Halibel laughed humorlessly as they strolled down the corridor "You could not have possibly known…such a young person and so silly."

"You're not that much older than me."

"In terms of experience, I am." She glared at her, daring her to intervene "My divorce with Aizen Sosuke wasn't so much about doing the right thing as it was about doing what was necessary. I left for my sake and my sake alone. I barely thought of my children at the time. And now it has haunted me for fifteen years, while I've been wondering how they have been holding up."

Soi didn't answer until she disposed the bags in their room "They've been holding up fine, or at least well enough to know that they should oppose their father with everything they've got. Perhaps Sun-sun told you the circumstances."

"I've never thought all my children would be so…" Halibel made an uncertain gesture with her hand "And yet I can't help but feel happy for them. They managed without me…"

Soi sighed: "I am not a person to grant you forgiveness either, Halibel-sama. You should talk to Sun-sun about this."

"I see our feelings are mutual. You don't like me the least."

"I do not like the idea of your judging me without even having known me. That is all. BHaHaHut if you really must have my opinion on your conduct, yes, I do find it rather appalling, because you would choose to beat yourself over something so insignificant. Do you think that you would've been better off if you stayed? If you suffered in silence and pretended you didn't see what was going on around you? If you let him bend you until you broke? Yes, I'm sure you would've set an amazing example for those children." Soi rolled her eyes

Halibel gave her a bitter smile "You're not sensitive."

"No, I'm not." The petite woman paused and cleared the bed for Halibel to sit on it "There's just one thing I'd like to ask, though. Do you really find me that unsuitable for Sun-sun?"

"Do you think you are?" the blonde asked, shaking her shoes off with a content sigh as she sank in the mattress

"I've been very considerate of our situation. I don't know how much Yoruichi told you, but I didn't leave my former occupation under the best of circumstances and you know how your daughter's family is. But I'm willing to do anything for her, and follow her whenever she goes."

"I like the part about 'our situation'." Halibel stated as a matter-of-fact "But I don't agree with anything else." Soi glared at her, daring her to continue "I can see your intentions are good, and that you are looking out for Sun-sun, but that's not enough, sensei. Yoruichi has told me everything she knows about you, and so far I cannot detect that you're ready for a relationship with my daughter…or any relationship for that matter. You are never fully decided. You have boyfriends that you don't care about, and you dump them as soon as they no longer serve their purpose. You claim to love my daughter, yet you do not act on it, letting your fear of exposure rule you."

"Is it not dangerous then, to let the fact that we are in love leek out? Would this not have dire consequences for the two of us? Whatever my achievements are, no school would hire me to teach if they knew I view my students as sexual objects, and every ounce of respect I have fought to gain over the years would be gone. Sun-sun might take an easier fall because they would surely make it look like she's a brainless puppet, manipulated on whim…but it would not do her any good in the future. It's bad enough that we are both women, and you know how conceited people are-what would be thought of her if it was widely known that she was in a relationship with her homeroom teacher. Am I not supposed to look after her, look after the two of us?" Soi took a deep breath and realized that it had all gone out in one go. Wow…just wow…she'd never thought she had so much bottled up before and yet there still was a lot she wanted to say.

"It is dangerous, and it is good that you are concerned about your future." Halibel began slowly "However, you must also understand, suppressing your desires, your thoughts, and keeping all the struggles to yourself is not going to help your relationship in any way, Soi Fong. Sun-sun will get accustomed to not seeing you display any emotion, or, even worse, start thinking that you are only fooling around with her. It might seem strange to you, but that is how things are, and when you do feel like you're free to do whatever you want, you might be surprised to see that she doesn't want the same things as you anymore. Tell me, have the two of you even talked about it? Have you even tried functioning as a couple?"

The blonde sighed with exasperation when Soi shook her head in a decided 'no'.

"Well, you should try and do something about it. There are lots of things that can be done without any danger to your career…or hers, for that matter." Halibel pulled her rubber bands that held her hair up and let the shiny locks cascade around her face. "I am not reproaching your character, but you are cowardly and indecisive. You don't know what you want, or, if you do, you act against your wishes because you're too afraid of the consequences. You're bound to hurt someone if you're not careful."

She had nothing to say against that.

* * *

Sun-sun came out of the bathroom in her pajamas and a towel wrapped around her head. She was surprised to find her sensei sitting on the edge of one of the beds, twirling her glasses in her hands. "So, we're finally alone." She noted, while she searched for a comb. "Yoruichi-san is quite a…force of nature."

"Is that perhaps a hint that I might have something to do with this meeting?"

"Would a pregnant woman and her wife take such a journey to simply enjoy the weather here?" Sun-sun asked, placing her hands on her hips "You organized this, didn't you?"

"I wrote them an e-mail to tell them that you got invited for an interview." Soi shrugged "Thought that Halibel might like to know. Yoruichi may or may not have gotten a bit too excited and grilled me for details, and she may or may not have decided to organize a little reunion on a neutral territory."

"She has no fear, does she?"

"Not really. There's no way for your father to find out about this either, unless somebody tells him." Soi shrugged "Besides, I thought that it might make you happy."

Sun-sun groaned as she sat down on her own bed and tried writhing her comb through her wet hair "Please, sensei, don't give me the 'I did it for you' guild trip, I can guess what you were thinking." She paused and added in a softer tone "I'm not mad at you for what you did."

"But you're not happy." Soi pointed out "You barely looked at her and when you talked, you looked like two strangers meeting for the first time."

"What did you expect? That I would run towards her and fall in her arms? That I would say 'I love you, mommy', and all that. I'm not even allowed to call her 'mother', you know." Sun-sun rolled her eyes, pulling at her hair mercilessly "I barely remember her. The only thing I know is that she's different from my father because he sent her away! I never thought that I might like her!"

"Guess so." Soi replied, moving on her bed and nudging her to lie back on her lap. She took the comb from Sun-sun's hand and started fixing the knots in her hair. "Look, I hope….I mean…I've been thinking…you love me and all…"

"Of course I do!" the girl replied vehemently. It would've been easier if she was standing, but hey, not all good moments are perfect

"I love you too…" Soi mumbled, pausing enough to let Sun-sun look at her without problems "It's…not easy for you, is it?" she resumed her combing, focusing on undoing the stubborn knots as gently as possible "I just want you to be safe…that we can still have a future together when this is over. And…I guess I wanted to show you without having to put you in any danger…without giving reason for any trouble. And yet I never manage to hit the mark."

"It's fine." Sun-sun lied, before she closed her eyes and sighed when she felt Soi run her fingers through her hair. The older woman let the shiny locks fall down, admiring the jet black color

"But since it takes two to tango…well…ugh…" Soi took a deep breath to brace herself "I need to know what you want, Sun-sun. I need to know I won't hurt you. Otherwise…there wouldn't be a point."

The comb was left on the side and Sun-sun stood up, facing away from her. Then, slowly, she turned her head on the side, and her eyes still fixed on the quilt of the bed, she said: "I want to be with you. To know that this is worth it. You've been trying to make things right, but I don't know if…if I'll be able to make it."

Soi sighed, before sitting up on the bed. Slowly, she removed her glasses and set them on the nightstand, before she reached out to touch Sun-sun's cheek. The girl turned around timidly, to see her teacher bow her head slowly and press her mouth to hers. Soi Fong's hand snaked around her neck and pulled her closer until the girl was kneeling between her legs. Then, she opened her mouth and nibbled at her lower lip, sucking it gently between hers. Sun-sun gasped, and Soi released her immediately, but before she could do so much as apologize the girl latched onto her mouth again, her hands diving in her hair and pulling her in with a force she didn't know her student possessed.

With Soi's hands wrapped around her waist, Sun-sun didn't know what else could she want in the world. For a split second, she hesitated, and her teacher felt it immediately, but before she could hesitate…before she could take it back, Soi pulled away and stroked her cheek, a little smile on her face. "Are you alright?"

"I am…just…I don't know what to do…" Sun-sun whispered

"You don't have to know anything. You don't have to worry about paying back or being anything less than what you are. This isn't a test." Soi let out a smile, before she kissed her again. Slowly, she edged back so that Sun-sun could have some space. "Do you want to turn off the lights?"

"Umm…yes." She mumbled. As her teacher reached over for the switch, she hesitated before tearing the covers off the bed and climbing underneath them just as the lights dimmed.

The curtains were thin, providing little to hide the spectacular winter sky outside. It was specked with clouds, indicating that a snow storm was about to fall, and yet the light from outside was still spectacular. Sun-sun pulled the cover to her chin, feeling her cheeks heat up when Soi stood by the side of the bed, watching her silently. Then, she slowly stood up and seized the hem of her sweater, pulling it up until it went over her head and then let it slide down her arms on a nearby chair. She repeated the procedure with the dress shirt she had underneath, plucking each button painfully slow, as if she waited for Sun-sun to give her some sort of vocal sign of….something. Stop, go, anything. The garment slid down her pale shoulders and pooled on the floor.

Sun-sun squirmed under the covers as she watched Soi Fong remove her clothing. This was stupid! She had no reason to feel embarrassed. And yet…and yet…she looked so good like that…she'd never seen her like this before. Soi looked ethereal, almost pixie-like, with her small body and her wild hair. Then she turned towards her, her eyes questioning. Sun-sun gulped, before edging towards the side of the bed to make room for her. Soi paused, before she joined her under the covers.

"Are you cold?" she asked, gently hugging her "You're shaking."

"I'm fine." _I just need to get sex out of my very perverted mind_, Sun-sun added to herself as she snuggled in closer. "Though I think you should go to your own bed soon. I don't think…I mean…I often…well…Sometimes my thoughts run faster than me and I…" Soi's hands trailed up and down her spine, accommodating her to the feeling of another person. Then she kissed her forehead and whispered:

"I see. Would you like me to do that for you?"

The girl paused, before nodding a "Yes."

She started kissing her again, placing soft pecks down her cheek and jaw, then the column of her throat and lower, to the place where her shirt was gaping open. Sun-sun heard her take a ragged breath, before tracing her hand over the spot. Slowly, she ran a finger down the line, reaching the hem, then slipped her hand under, moving it back up. The buttons came undone along the way, exposing milky skin and firm muscles. Soi paused long enough to admire her toned stomach, the gentle curves over her sides before pausing on her breasts.

"Sensei…" Sun-sun squirmed. She'd already seen them, why was she looking at them so closely now?

"You know…" Soi mumbled, caressing one of her breasts casually "You don't need to call me 'sensei' when you don't have to."

"I thought…" Sun-sun trailed off, breathing a sigh when Soi's fingers ghosted over her nipple, tracing the areola before squeezing it lightly. The petite woman smiled, before leaning in to place a soft kiss on the breast.

Sun-sun's hands automatically went in her hair again, caressing the scalp while the shiny locks slid between her fingers. The sensation was…incomparable. It was different from the fantasies, of course, but it wasn't just the physical experience. Having Soi there, actually touching her, actually holding her without fear was far more fulfilling than the knowledge of any other achievement she'd had in her life.

Her cheeks flushed with heat and something more and suddenly, her shyness gave way to need. Sun-sun moved underneath Soi, kicking the cover off in an attempt to cool her body off, but it only exposed her more to the other woman's eyes. Soi paused for long enough to throw the blankets away and position herself better over the younger girl before she nuzzled the valley of her breasts.

"Se….Soi…" Sun-sun whispered, her face turning pink with something akin to fear.

"I know…" she mumbled, moving her hands down her sides and stopping at the waistband of her flannel pants "Do you…?"

"Yes…yes, please, take them off…" her voice was thin with tension, and when Soi pulled the pants down she was surprised to see the white cotton panties she had underneath were already sporting a damp patch. Feeling self-conscious, Sun-sun tried closing her knees and cover herself up with her hand, but before she could so much protest, Soi's hands were on her calves, moving up and down, digging into the tense muscles in a way that sent delicious jolts of pleasure higher. Slowly, she nudged the closed knees apart and rested her palms on the girl's inner thighs, revering the silky skin there. Her fingers danced higher and higher to the apex of Sun-sun's thighs and before she knew it, she was spreading her legs wider and wider, inviting her in.

A ghost of a smile made its way to Soi's face as she rubbed her index and middle finger to the wet spot of her panties. Sun-sun gasped and her hips buckled forward instantaneously. The friction, though painful, was addicting. Soi moved to rest next to her and wrapped her free hand over her shoulders. "Sun-sun…" she whispered

"Please…" the girl was panting already, squeezing her thighs to get more feeling "Please…don't stop! Whatever you're doing…don't stop!"

Soi nuzzled the crook of her neck in a sign of resignation, before slipping her hand slowly into her panties. Sun-sun gasped, loudly this time, and Soi had to lean in to kiss her to keep her quiet. The girl twisted in her arms, her hands fisted in the sheets as she tried to be as quiet as possible, but she just couldn't do it. She broked for air, gasping loudly as Soi's fingers circled and moved against her clit. "Soi…I…oh, Kami…I won't be able to hold it for long…"

"Nobody's asking you to." The older woman whispered warmly, thrusting her fingers with equal vigor. Sun-sun gasped a few times, then bit her lip, aching her back while her entire body tensed up. And suddenly, she collapsed on the sheets, her face red and her eyes flush, quivering slightly in the aftershocks.

Soi rubbed her a few more times before pulling her hand out and sitting up to examine it curiously. Slowly, she brought it up to her face and licked her fingers clean. "Sensei!" Sun-sun whispered furiously, and she turned around to look at her curiously "You can't…that was just…you know…there!"

Smiling, she leaned in and pecked her lips "Yes, it was, and I'm looking forward to having it there more than you can think of in the future." Sun-sun flushed, equally embarrassed and aroused from what had just happened.

"Well, then…" she mumbled, trying to reach for Soi, but the older woman just shook her head playfully and leaned in to kiss her again, this time with more vigor.

"Believe me…" Soi whispered when she pulled away for breath "When I say that I'd like nothing better than to continue with this…but tomorrow will be a big day and you need to get some sleep."

"Will you stay with me?" the girl asked urgently, though her eyes were already dimming with fatigue

"For a while…" Soi agreed, while helping her pull on her clothes and then lying next to her. "Promise me one thing, Sun-sun?"

"Yes?"

"When you get called…Speak from the heart." The older woman whispered as she held her lover close. Sun-sun hummed something in affirmation, before finally succumbing to the darkness.

* * *

**A/N-So there you have it, chapter twenty.**

***collapses* gah, I feel like I've run a marathon...which is kinda stupid since I don't even do P.E. **

**That aside, I'd really like to know what you guys think right now. I'm tired and I know I really messed up with the last chapter, but I'd like to know what you're thinking. My main idea, when writing this fic, was not to do a mushy high school drama, but to make a sort of a real-life study. Now I know stuff like that rarely happens into real life, but I'd like to keep things as real as possible, and for that I need your help. **

**Now, you may have noticed that in ch. 19 Sun-sun and Soi's reactions to seeing Halibel and Yoruichi were absent, and I wanted to attribute it to the fact that, indeed, may years have passed since they had last met and a little disorientation was in order. It's not like me to go off and explain to you what I meant, hell, I don't think you guys would agree with me either, but I'm very much desperate for some reviews here and I would very much appreciate it if you guys just let me know if this story is causing any superior brain activity in you or not.**

**So, there you have it. A hell of a long chapter with my very furst attempt at yuri smut (not a very successful one either, but then again, I'll probably improve after I finish reading "Yurihime Wildrose").  
**

**Review!**


	21. Cell Block Tango

**A few things before we begin...**

**First of, and most importantly, sorry everyone, for keeping away for so long. I know I'm a lousy writer when it comes to working periodically, but I found myself blocked yuri-wise thanks to a not-so-welcome crushing for a guy...yeah, I know, shocking, I actually may be straight...I can't imagine how that happened. Jokes aside, I really would like to upload more frequently, but with exams rolling around the corner, I don't know how that'll be possible. Let's keep our fingers crossed.**

**Second: HOLY SHIT, THIS FIC JUST GOT ONE YEAR OLD! *weeps* My baby is growing up! I'm experiencing a strange mixture of pride and worry, like anyone, over its growth. I'm not even sure I have done much positive work over this last year, but I do hope you guys enjoy it and will continue to enjoy it while I'm posting.**

**Third: The last chapter got the biggest number of long reviews this story has ever gotten, and I just want to thank you all for your support and kindness. I know this chapter is less than brilliant, but...I put all my efforts into posting it, and we could attribute it to my crush finally dying out. Jeez, love is a fickle thing sometimes.**

**A brief recap of what has happened lately: Soi Fong and Sun-sun went to England for Sun-sun's interview for Oxford, and to get away from the troubles at home, which at this point are: The Chronicles, a tattler online blog with a yet unidentified author who seems to have access to people's secrets; a Rukia-Ichigo-Orihime love triangle that settled in Rukia's favor, leaving Orihime sick and depressed; we also have Ulquiorra taking a little personal interest into Hime's case, Sun-sun's younger brother Tesla's amateur painting career, and an unidentified number of the Aizen siblings screwing with their teachers. (oh, fuck, this fic turned into a soap opera!)**

**Chapter 21. Let's wish it a Happy Birthday with Cell Block Tango from "Chicago"!**

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* * *

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_How is it that love makes us desperate? We wish for something so much, yet we cannot achieve it. The feeling can be easily distinguished-the frustration, the anger, the pain…Knowing that in the end, doing everything you can isn't enough._

_It's dull at first, but it gets stronger. So strong that at some point, you just cannot ignore it. It throbs in your chest and twists your heart, making you curl up somewhere and cry at your own incapability, until you are like a dirty towel, wrung of tears. _

It was snowing again, Ulquiorra thought wearily as he donned his white lab coat. The sudden snow storm had hit Tokyo almost as soon as the plane that took Soi and Sun-sun to London was out of sight, and things had been pretty much deteriorating since then. In one day, more students had called in sick, even more of them fell on the slippery ice and broke arms and legs. If it happened on the school grounds, it was his job to take care of them until their parents (or the ambulance, whichever came first) arrived. He had to admit, he was missing Sun-sun's help-the girl was always cool about things, not letting hysteria or pain deter her. She really could be a medic, if she set her heart to it.

Soi's students had pretty much stayed home, feigning illness, with the exception of Ichigo who took the opportunity to go in the other class and stay with Rukia.

_Of course_, Ulquiorra thought, _that's what you did, after all. You fall in love and you stop thinking! Ichigo's lucky Kuchiki-sensei hasn't kicked him out of the school yet. _

Actually, Byakuya had raised the question, more than once, during the staff meetings, but they had never really come to look at it closely. Furthermore, with Soi in England, they couldn't possibly discuss expelling Ichigo from school. The boy had done nothing wrong, in spite the fact that Byakuya thought otherwise. But there was nothing to be done. The school had no policy against relationships between students, and the two of them had done nothing wrong or inappropriate, yet if Byakuya had his way, Rukia would've been taken away to some remote mansion and Ichigo wouldn't have been allowed to graduate. Maybe the only thing stopping him from doing something was fear of what his family would say.

_It's sickening._

The thought had been going through his head for a while, in spite of his attempts to ignore it. For no better reason, Ulquiorra quickly emptied his file cabinet and started re-sorting the documents, hoping that the job would at least give him something to do. It wasn't too difficult, however, and he soon found himself on that same path again.

Everyone was selfish. Selfish and hypocritical. Byakuya with his thoughts about propriety, Ichigo and Rukia with their love, even Soi, because she managed to help everyone keep their emotions in check while she was there and now she had jumped at the opportunity of being alone with Sun-sun. Things were getting worse by the day, and the 'Chronicles' spewing their garbage every few days didn't make them better. How was this fair? How was it justified? Ulquiorra didn't know, but he certainly wasn't the one suffering most from it.

_Don't go there_, his mind warned. The subject had already caused him some serious headaches and he wasn't ready to try and solve the problem again. He was obviously getting emotionally attached to this case, which was stupid because it would end in less than three months.

Somebody knocked on the door. Thinking it was another student with a cold, Ulquiorra didn't bother turning around and continued sorting through his files, even when he heard the person enter the office. So it came as a surprise when he heard Inoue's voice behind him.

"Excuse me, sensei, am I intruding?"

He whirled around so fast that she jumped back in surprise. "Oh, sorry, I didn't know you were so busy." She laughed weakly.

"I did not expect you to be at school." He said.

"Umm….I though I might miss something." She mumbled, looking away. Ulquiorra looked past her-she was alone.

"Didn't somebody from Matsumoto-sensei's class come to take you here?" they were supposed to, anyway, he thought grimly. Did they think she would come safely? What if she got sick and fainted in the hallway? Of course, Orihime didn't really look ill. A little pale, maybe, but not ill. Since her little stunt in the summer, she had been eating regularly, thank God, and Ulquiorra had lately dismissed the possibility of her going back to starving herself. She looked fine, as if nothing had happened….but sometimes there was a vacant, sad look about her, and he worried that she might break down.

That's how she looked then, too. Vacant. Inexistent. Sad.

"Nobody came with me." She shook her head "I didn't make it to class. I just…couldn't." she pointed at the files "Can I help you with that? Sun-sun isn't back yet, maybe I can be in her place for a while?"

Ulquiorra shrugged. "If that is what you want."

"Thank you!" she beamed. He explained the system and let her work. For a while, they shuffled the papers in silence. And then she started. "Sensei, I…I wanted to talk to you for some time…I'm really grateful for what you did for me in the summer."

"What did I do?" he asked, not understanding.

"When I was sick…thank you for not telling everyone why I did it." she said, blushing. Ulquiorra looked down, frowning.

"It wasn't my decision to make. And if you will thank somebody, you should also go to Soi Fong-sensei and Sun-sun. They, too, deserve credit for what they did." He looked at her "You're not thinking about starting again, do you? Anorexia is a horrible condition, Inoue-san, and it's not easily curable. You got off easy last time."

She looked down at her feet "You think me unworthy, don't you?"

Ulquiorra's nostrils flared and he focused on his job. "This is not about worthiness and unworthiness, Inoue. If you ask me, it's a silly notion. A person either does something or they don't. I cannot tell you what you want to hear because it's not something I mean, and I don't say things I don't believe in. I don't think Ichigo doesn't see you as the person you are, nor that he would suddenly discover any feelings for you."

"But what if…"

"You're a good person." Ulquiorra slammed the folders he held in the desk and turned to glare at her "But you must accept that those qualities alone will not attract Kurosaki to you. He likes Kuchiki and you just can't be her. Move on with it-there is nothing you can do."

Her eyes were swimming with tears and for a second he thought he went too far. Slowly, he sighed and put his hands up in resignation. "I don't know what will make it better, Inoue, other than accepting that you're just not the person he loves."

"But…what if….if…" she sniffled "What if nobody loves me?"

"Then you must find a way to live." He replied "Identifying yourself through love alone is not a way of life. By that logic, you exist only when you are loved."

Ulquiorra chanced a glance. Orihime wasn't crying, but her head was bowed low. Good god, she looked ashamed. "I'm sorry."

"What for?" she asked "I deserve it."

He curled his fingers under her chin and lifted it so she could look at him. Tears started to fall and for a second, he panicked. He didn't know what to say, or what to do, to make it better. And here he was wishing to help her out!

"I'm sorry." She started "I…I just...I keep coming here, telling you all this…it's wrong of me to treat you like that. You just…I come to you, thinking there is nothing I could do, no way out, and when I tell you things, I always seem to feel better…you seem to make it easier, even though you say nothing…but…but…" she raised her hand and hid her eyes behind her sleeve "But sensei is also a real man, not an automat. I shouldn't be doing this. I shouldn't be making this so hard for you! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"

His fingers closed around her wrist and brought her hand down, taking care not to hurt her. Orihime stared at him, and for the first time since she'd known him, Ulquiorra seemed completely undone. His face was grim, but determined…the face of a man that doesn't hold any ideas anymore.

"Sen…." She began, but she never got to finish the sentence. His arms wrapped around her and brought her close…

* * *

Soi ignored the stares boring in her back and laced her fingers with Sun-sun's. Surely, holding your beloved's hand wasn't too much for their mother to handle. After all, Halibel had the right to make her point last night…and they had the right to ignore her.

Sun-sun, on her part, was feeling strangely giddy and relieved. The interview had passed well, the people were friendly and welcoming, and she felt at ease. She wasn't sure whether or not she would be given the scholarship, or even the place, but she was glad. She had done what she could and now it was up to them. She was happy.

Soi pulled her closer and kissed the top of her head. "Great job, Sun-chan. I'm proud of you."

The girl looked up at her sensei, before standing up on her tiptoes and kissing the corner of her mouth clumsily. Happiness took some getting used to. She wouldn't get the hang of it immediately. Right now, she could only feel, and she felt like throwing cartwheels…

It was strange. It wasn't even a week since she got that invitation, and yet she felt so very different. Not because of the distance, and not because of her mother…Sun-sun knew better than that. Halibel and she still had a lot of catching up to do, and the girl hadn't had the time to discuss with her mother that little chat she had with Soi yesterday. She had a good mind about telling her that what she did with her teacher was none of her business, but Soi hadn't left her side all day and she wasn't sure if she ought to cause a scene in front of her.

One thing was certain-she would never writhe under her father's finger again. Even if she played the role of the good daughter for a while, she wouldn't let her fear of him rule her life. If she became a doctor, she would do it because she wanted it. She smiled and snuggled closer to Soi.

Yoruichi watched the wordless exchange with a smile, before looking down at her wife. Halibel had pursed her lips and was playing with her golden locks. Laughing, the dark-skinned woman bent down and gave her a sound peck on the cheek.

"What was that for?" Halibel asked, frowning

"You're just so cute when you're cranky." Yoruichi said, her eyes dancing with mischief "Too bad we can't play right now. I can think of a couple of things we could do."

Halibel bushed profusely, looking at her with something akin to indignation. "You really are insufferable sometimes."

"Now, now, I told you already. You're worrying too much."

"Your friend doesn't seem to listen to warnings." She mumbled, grim.

"On the contrary." Yoruichi grinned "I think she did exactly what you told her. Just don't try and break them up too soon, they'll eat you whole."

* * *

Sun-sun talked to her father long enough to reassure him that it all went well, and then quickly spoke to Lupi and Tesla. Her twin wasn't exactly in a hurry to talk to her, but her younger brother talked to her for fifteen minutes about nothing at all. He never said it, but he sounded troubled. It worried her in turn, but she had no idea of what to do, except maybe to hope everything would be alright until she came back to Japan.

She hung up and turned to Soi, who was reading some book on the bed. A.S. Byatt's "Possession". Sun-sun didn't know much about the book, other than the fact that it was made into a movie, but by the looks of it, it was no child's trifle. Not that she would've expected any less from her sensei, but Soi had been reading that book ever since they came back from the walk. Sun-sun had been hoping for…well, something different.

"Sensei?" No reaction. Slowly, Sun-sun climbed on the bed and settled next to Soi. "Sensei."

"Hm?" The other woman blinked up "What is it, Sun-chan?"

"I wanted to ask…" Sun-sun began "Is teaching what you always wanted to do?"

Well that was surprising. Taken aback, Soi carefully set the book down and looked at her student. "That's an interesting question. Why do you ask?" Sun-sun shrugged "You're not perhaps having any second thoughts about your career path, do you?"

"Not really. Medicine appeals to me." Sun-sun admitted "It's just that…you seem passionate about the subject matter, but never on the teaching. You treat your students well, but you keep them at an arm's distance…well, most of them anyway." The girl blushed

"Interesting observation." Soi noted, taking her glasses off and nibbling on one of the ends "How does that imply that I didn't want to teach from the beginning?"

"I don't know. You're not like Unohana-sensei. You don't seem to enjoy working with people much."

Soi shrugged "Well, to answer your question, at the beginning I didn't even think that I would be working. My parents are pretty conservative and when I was applying to college, I half-expected them to set me up with an arranged marriage. My major didn't seem to be of importance so I decided to do what I liked. I originally entertained hopes of getting a Ph.D. and entering some research work, or a position as a professor at some university, but by the time I was working on my Master's thesis I realized I wouldn't have money to get through with a doctorate and settled on pedagogy instead."

"So you wanted to be a scholar?"

"That's a pretty generalized view of it, but yes."

"You could still do that, you know." Sun-sun pointed out. Soi smiled ruefully

"I could, but right now, I've barely had more than four years of actual teaching experience. Besides, I need to be able to support myself. I cannot go back to my parents now."

Sun-sun saw her tense and realized that this was pushing the limits. Soi obviously had some issues in the past she needed to deal with before she spoke them out loud, but it made her wonder how grave they actually were. "I see…"

"No, you don't." Sighing, Soi put the book away and turned to look at her student. "There are some things you don't know about me, Sun-sun, things that I rather wish you didn't. When I was in college…studying wasn't the first thing on my mind. It was something I did well and I did it with ease, so I decided to do other things. Experiment. And I experimented to the point where I'm missing months, which I have no memory of. I had gone to the point where sex wasn't a…a way of bonding, a source of pleasure, or even a diversion. If I didn't have sex, I felt incomplete. You know what it's like to identify yourself only through the opinion others have of you. For me, it was sex."

Sun-sun touched her hand "But you don't do that anymore. You're not that person now."

"Yes, but I've grown to fear her. I feared her so much that it nearly ruined my life." Soi shook her head "Did you know that you're not the first of my students to…have feelings for me? Back at my old school, a girl from my class threw herself at me, insisting that I fuck her. I had a fiancé then, my last attempt to fit into some idea of happiness. I refused to fuck her, but I wanted…I wanted to. The monster wanted out."

"And then?"

"The girl accused me of attacking her. They suspended me from school and started an investigation. There was a lot of media coverage, because it was a catholic establishment for girls and I am a woman. In the course of the inquiry, they discovered the girl was not right in the head to begin with, but my fiancé left me because he thought me guilty. It wasn't much of a loss, but it still shook me up. Taught me not to lie to myself anymore."

Sun-sun looked away. "So you're saying that control stopped you the first time?" _jealous much_, her subconscious sneered. Sun-sun blushed and looked down at her lap, but it was too late.

"No, not really." Soi replied flatly, having seen through her already "I don't trust my control when it comes to sex. But I knew what I had in stake. I wouldn't have risked everything I worked so hard to build for someone I didn't love."

Sun-sun glared at her. "Really?" she didn't seem so convinced "So you're saying you love me?"

Soi looked at her, surprised "Why do you doubt me?"

"Why would you pull back then, last night?" Before Sun-sun could even continue, Soi grabbed her shoulder and flipped her on her back, before moving to straddle her hips. Her eyes were dark and her lips were turned up into a grim smirk.

"Well, we'll just have to rectify that. But I'm telling you here and now, when we're at school, you forget about this entirely." Soi watched her nod, satisfied, before reaching for the hem of her shirt and lifting it over her head. Sun-sun raised her arms to comply, but before she even got the hair out of her face, Soi was making quick work on her bra and skirt.

Sun-sun flushed as her sensei looked her over under the bright light. "What are you looking at so much?"

"Your breasts." Soi stated bluntly, before running her thumb over one of her nipples "They're really lovely."

"Please…" she begged "Please don't look at me like that."

"Why not?" Soi asked, bending down to lick one of the pebbled peaks.

"Because…ugh…because…" Sun-sun began, but her sentence was lost in a loud moan when Soi's hand came on her other breast and pinched her nipple. After a minute, though, she pulled up, kissing lightly on the skin of her collarbone, neck and face. "I don't want you to look at me." Sun-sun finally rasped. Soi seemed to consider it for a while, pausing her ministrations long enough for Sun-sun to realize the state she was at. Almost completely naked, her body was tense from the cold and from arousal. Her breathing was ragged, and there was a decided, almost painful throb in her center.

"Well then…" Soi began, raising herself up on her elbows. Sun-sun panicked-was she backing out? But before she could say anything, Soi undid her tie and quickly secured it around her eyes.

"S…"

"You don't have to look at me look at you, don't you?" Soi asked "Or perhaps you'd rather we didn't do this, hmm?" one of her hands pinned her down by the shoulder, while the other barely grazed the bottom of her panties. Sun-sun gasped and bucked her hips wildly, seeking for friction. Soi chuckled and bent down to kiss her cheek "I see then. Hold on the sheets, please."

Sun-sun blushed profusely, but did as she was told. Soi continued to tease her, stopping only to kiss and suck on her breasts. She wanted nothing more than to rip the tie off, but she realized that Soi had been right. It was like the tingling of bells. Her touches were as gentle and sweet as the caress of raindrops, and twice as addictive. The world was black and silver, all cold lights and abandon. She closed her eyes and gave into her caresses.

Her hands were cold. She noticed it immediately, although it was the painful burn of the ice, but a soft hum of water. Slender fingers danced on her stomach, playing, teasing, occasionally dipping under the waistband of her panties and brushing her clit. Then Soi paused, and Sun-sun heard the rustling of clothes. Then she was back, touching her, pressing harder and harder on her clit…and then she felt something hot and wet draw circles on her belly. Sun-sun gasped when she felt it press on her clothed center, now almost completely drenched. Soi chuckled.

"Why aren't you eager? Would you like us to continue, Sun-chan?"

"Yes. Oh, yes, please!" she didn't even pause to think. This was so much like her daydreams that she wasn't even beginning to question why Soi was doing this.

Soi rolled her fingers over her clothed clit one more time, before resolutely tearing the panties down her legs and leaving her completely naked. Sun-sun tensed, waiting for her next move…but it didn't came. Confused, she almost took her blindfold off, but just then, she felt Soi's fingers again, moving right over the juncture of her thighs. The feeling was so exquisite she nearly passed out, and she let out a breath of relief she didn't even realize that she was holding. However, nothing prepared her for what came next.

Soi continued teasing her clit with her fingers, disposing rough and soft strokes at an even pace, taking her time unlike before. Then she suddenly lay flat on her stomach on the bed and laid her tongue flat on Sun-sun's clit. The girl gave a piercing shriek and bucked wildly against Soi's mouth, but the older woman seized her hips and pinned them down to the mat. "Now, now…" she teased, taking another long lick, this time up her slit "You're the one who doesn't want to rush things, Sun-sun. Be patient."

"Please…" Please, please, please, please "Don't stop."

"I'm not." She replied, before using her fingers to part her entrance. Then, without warning, she thrust her tongue in, and for a second Sun-sun forgot speech and thought. Then, when Soi started moving it, driving it in deeper, she no longer recognized herself. She let out a string of profanities that she didn't even think she knew before, and trashed on the mattress as Soi continued to fuck her with her tongue. One of Soi's hands disappeared for some seconds, and when it came back and rubbed her clit, her fingers were slick with something. What did she do? Sun-sun barely had enough time to conjure the thought, when the pressure that had been building up in her finally broke and she came, loud and hard, her whole body arching up in one final effort, before collapsing on the mat, completely undone.

Soi lapped teasingly at her a few more times and then pulled up, taking the tie off her eyes. Sun-sun stared at her, eyes wide and surprised, before rising into a sitting position faster than anyone would've imagined and crushed her lips to hers. Soi had a strange, bitter taste about her, but she only found it more intoxicating. Sun-sun cupped her sensei's cheeks as she thrust her own tongue in her mouth. The older woman chuckled slightly, before putting her hands on her beloved's hips and brought them so close they were practically molded on each other. Just then, Sun-sun realized that Soi Fong was also completely naked, and finally looked down to appraise her sensei.

She was beautiful. Toned and shapely and slim, she was feminine and delicate without losing that masculine power she had about her. Her breasts were small and pert, her nipples dark and hard with arousal, and her abs were well defined and strong. Sun-sun blushed as she zeroed on the umpteenth time on her pubis, and wondered if she could touch it.

Soi moved so that Sun-sun was straddling one of her thighs now, and that she was straddling her other leg, before grinding their bodies together. Sun-sun let out a gasp when she realized what her lover wanted, and thrust back with equal vigor.

Soon, the tension was building up again, but there was something more to it. Seeing Soi's face, her cheeks flushed with pleasure and her brow furrowed with concentration, did something to Sun-sun. Without realizing it, she grabbed her shoulder for leverage, while she palmed one of her breasts and fondled it. Soi gave a sharp moan and thrust her hips more urgently, her breath coming out in short pants. Sun-sun wanted more. She wanted to see that face more. Resolute, she leaned in to suck on one of her nipples while she pinched the other one with her hands. Soi bit her lip, gave a few more thrusts, before she yelled out and came, clutching hard on Sun-sun's hair.

* * *

_Meanwhile, in a prestigious school in Japan, a green-haired girl got her hands on a file that shouldn't have left the cabinet. Her eyes widened as she read through the lines, and her mouth fell open with shock. It was unbelievable…unimaginable…but it was exactly what she'd been looking for lately, something she'd wanted for a long time._

'_Fong, Soi' was the name written over the titular page._

**A/N-Well, it's high time the shit hit the fan, isn't it? *grabs onto something* Oh, man, this'll be the Titanic all over again!**

**Big thanks once more to everyone who reviewed: I treasure and adore them all. Your support is the best thing happening to me! Thank you!**


	22. Reise, Reise

**Thought I gave up on this story? **

**You wish.**

**Theme song: Reise, Reise by Rammstein**

* * *

Aizen Sosuke spent exactly ten minutes with his daughter after she returned to get the highlights of her trip to England and her interview at Oxford University, before promptly ignoring her again. Momo was a little more attentive, grilling her about the finer details, which, thankfully, Sun-sun had had enough time to figure out. Lupi seemed uninterested at what his sister had done, but Tesla and Apache listened to her words hungrily, as if she had come back from Paradise. Loli and Menoli ignored her completely, too busy planning on ways of escaping to new parties.

In spite of her less than spectacular homecoming, Sun-sun had one good reason to be in a good mood, to take her mother's insolence and her younger sisters' ignorance with grace. The same reason why she was looking forward to a brighter future, the same reason why she couldn't wait to finish high school.

Love.

Or, more importantly, the confirmation of that love. Even though Soi had made it abundantly clear that what happened in Oxford would have to stay in Oxford, at least until she got her diploma, Sun-sun couldn't help but smirk in contentment, especially when she came back to school and saw Kuchiki Byakuya's sour face. Her Japanese teacher and former imaginary romantic rival still seemed to have a hard time imagining why Soi Fong would turn down his advances and perhaps he entertained some hopes that she would reconsider. Sun-sun felt oddly smug whenever she saw his attempts at approaching Soi Fong and the slightly constipated face he made whenever she made it clear she wasn't interested.

However, Sun-sun put her efforts into working and making sure she didn't attempt any more attached to her teacher than she was. If they were caught, Soi was in the very real danger of losing her teacher's license and Sun-sun's chances of studying into a prestigious university would sink faster than a ton of lead. But they never thought how hard it would be, until something happened.

Shortly after they had returned, Soi Fong walked into class to have the whole room buzzing. That alone wasn't much of a surprise, only the murmurs got lower when she came in and were accompanied by suspicious glances. She started the lesson, and while everyone got their books out and prepared to take notes, they still stared at her from underneath their eyebrows and looked at each other suspiciously. Five minutes into it, and she was pissed, but it wasn't until Mizuiro didn't answer a question that she blew up:

"Alright, what is going on here? Are you pissed at me because I'm back and you can't find an excuse to be absent from the lessons?"

"Yeah! Maybe you should've stayed in England to bang with Aizen!" A girl from the back row yelled.

Soi stood there, dumbfound, for less than a second, before her eyes narrowed dangerously: "What did you say?"

The offending creature opened her mouth to repeat the remark, but something in Soi Fong's face made her swallow whatever she was about to say, and she shrunk back in her seat.

"I asked you a question, Miwa-san." Soi Fong said through clenched teeth, her voice an arctic gale. "Repeat what you just said."

The girl looked around for support, but her classmates, the rats-on-a-sinking ship that they were, didn't look up from their clenched hands. But when she looked up, her gaze was defiant: "Everyone knows it, but they won't say that you're a dyke and that you fucked Aizen Sun-sun in England."

"Really?" Soi asked calmly as she descended from the podium and stood in front of the class, her arms crossed in front of her chest. "And, pray, who is everyone?"

"Everyone! The whole school!" Miwa screamed.

"Really?" Soi's eyes shifted around, briefly landing on Sun-sun's pale face before flickering to Ichigo. "Kurosaki, have you heard about this?"

Ichigo blushed to the roots of his bright orange hair, but said nothing. Soi turned her head towards Keigo. "Asano?" Keigo was suddenly very interested in his notebook. "Inoue?" Orihime shook her head, her eyes nearly bursting with tears. Soi clenched her jaw, before turning back to Miwa. "Everyone, you say?"

"They're just cowards! But they know and they'll talk about it as soon as you're booted off school!"

"Really?"

"Yes! Just like we all know you were booted off your last school for fucking a student!"

That was enough. Soi's expression turned thunderous, and it took all her will not to lash out on the girl then and there: "I see. So the Momokawa Academy Chronicles had another issue?"

Miwa bristled, recognizing the mocking tone. "Yes, they did, and I don't care what you say, they're the truth. Just like they said the truth about…"

"Oh, for shit's sake!" Ichigo yelled and turned around to glare at Miwa "Why don't you shut up, for once? You know better than anyone that this blog is nothing but a big pile of horse dung. When has sensei treated us badly? When has she been unfair? She never showed special preference to any of us, Sun-sun especially! Why are you blowing this whole thing out of proportion?"

"You're just pissed Kuchiki-sensei doesn't let his sister go to school to meet you."

Ichigo opened his mouth to yell, but Orihime beat him to it. "Leave Kurosaki-kun and Kuchiki-san alone! They haven't done anything to you!"

"Oh, shut up. You'd be happy if everyone didn't find out what kind of a tramp you are. Pining after Kurosaki in one minute, screwing the doctor in the other!"

Ichigo jumped at that and made three steps towards Miwa, his knuckles clenching dangerously.

"Enough!" Soi Fong roared, which had all three students froze, Orihime and Miwa looking terrified, while Ichigo just glared. "Kurosaki, get back in your seat this instant."

"But sensei…" he looked ready to scream that it wasn't fair, but one glance from her silenced him and he sulked back into his place. Miwa opened her mouth to gloat, but Soi Fong turned her attention to her:

"One more word from you, Miwa, and you will be talking to the principle. Now, I want you to listen, I don't know what kind of nonsense has come out in that damn blog, but by this time you all know that while some things in there are true, they are the truth as the writer sees it." The whole class was silent. Soi Fong was a small, delicate woman, but if she managed to stop Kurosaki when he was on a killing spree without even raising a fist, they sat in terrified awe of her, listening. "How many of you have been slandered in that blog?" several arms raised, and she noted that some were the same who looked at her with contempt just minutes ago "And how do you like having your lives being exposed to the general public and twisted up however that person sees to fit their selfish needs? Each and every one of you knows just how true those reports are, and if you believe them, then I am certainly ashamed of you."

The class was silent. Their reactions to her speech varied – from shamed to indignant – but she was alright with it. She had gotten what she wanted. They had focused on their own problems and had forgotten about her.

"I may not be Japanese…" Soi began "…but I know that this is not a country where you accept slander with grace. If it were in my power, I would have done everything in my power to make sure that the person spreading these rumors gets the worst possible punishment. But right now, the best you can do is ignoring the reports and making it abundantly clear that their antics are not being appreciated."

Everyone looked down on their shoes, shamefaced. Then Kurosaki slammed his hands on the table and stood up:

"What are you all staring at! Sensei's right! Someone is playing us for fools and we're letting them, damn it!"

There was a murmur of agreement passing through the better part of the class. Even the most hostile ones seemed swayed. Soi watched them slowly regain their normal composure, and turned to the blackboard to write: "Discussion topic: The Internet as a field of free speech or a refuge of Anonymity". Then she sat back in her chair and watched the debate form. Sometimes, she liked her job very much.

However, when the bell rang, she rose from her seat: "Before you rush into the hallways, there is just one more thing I'd like to take care of. Miwa-san…" the girl visibly jumped when her name was called out, as if she'd thought herself out of trouble. As if, Soi thought, smirking inwardly, but maintained a professional tone as she spoke: "I will overlook your comments earlier today as the result of whatever high school drama you're currently going through. However, Aizen-san doesn't have to put up with your impertinent remarks, and I would suggest you apologize to her immediately."

The girl blushed and spluttered, but apologized to Sun-sun, who looked more than a little uncomfortable. Soi gave her a reassuring nod on her way out of the classroom, but didn't stay to chat, or to watch what the rest of the class would do. She had a bigger fish to fry.

* * *

Since there was usually one place where she could find Ulquiorra nowadays, she marched straight into the doctor's office without even bothering to knock. He jumped when he heard the door slam and stared at her like a deer in the headlights for two seconds before regaining his composure: "Soi Fong-sensei. Good to see you."

"Let's not beat about the bush, Ulquiorra-san. Do you know what's the newest rumor among the students? Somehow, the person behind the Chronicles has gotten their hands on some of the details of my leaving my previous working place."

Ulquiorra stared at her briefly, his face impassive, before turning towards his filing cabinet. Without saying a word, he pulled a drawer out and flipped through the files. And then flipped through them again. And again. Every time, his composure slipped a little, before he looked at her with mild distress. "I am sure there is a reasonable explanation. They might as well have Googled you."

"The details about the student were kept private among the staff and the principle." Soi shook her head "They were not released to the press… Ulquiorra, where's my file?"

"I was re-arranging my cabinets last week." He said impassively "I could have misplaced it."

"So you're saying there is a slight chance that you're the reason why my private life is now being discussed among the students? And…" She paused, stared, and then sniffed "Is that… cologne?"

For the first time since she ever knew him, Ulquiorra looked embarrassed. Even the tips of his ears turned red. He coughed, trying awkwardly to figure something, anything out, but Soi was onto him. Slowly, her gaze raked up and down his form, taking in the small, but subtle changes – the freshly cut hair and clean shaven face, new shirt, new scent. Her eyes narrowed. "You have a date."

"Nothing of the sort, I assure you." He said calmly, but his pupils were larger than usual. He was scared, Soi realized. She narrowed her eyes.

"Ulquiorra… when you were re-organizing last week, did anyone come into your office."

"Just Inoue-san, she helped me…" he trailed off, noticing his mistake.

"Did she now? And are you expecting her to come back and help you out some more?" Soi asked. Ulquiorra's eyes turned cold.

"It's not like that, sensei. You shouldn't make such claims."

"We'll see." She said, turning on her heel resolutely.

* * *

By the end of the week, the crazy looks and murmurs had mostly stopped, but Soi's patience was nevertheless wearing thin. Not only did she have to keep people in check, she had to go to Yamamoto-sensei's office several times and make statements to overly concerned parents who just didn't believe that the stuff in the Chronicles was a lie. After the third time she was forced to explain that the circumstances leading to her leaving her previous working place had nothing to do with a scandal (one with a foundation, anyway), she was swearing a bloody revenge on the bastard behind the stupid blog.

She hadn't spoken to Sun-sun, at least not into the dressing room or anywhere out of school. Not because she was afraid people would think it a confirmation of her guilt, but because she didn't want to upset the girl. Sun-sun had been nothing but understanding and supportive and Soi wasn't sure she wanted to tell her the recent suspicions that Inoue was behind the humiliating reports.

A lot of circumstances were present and Soi wasn't sure how she ought to interpret them. The blog had appeared when Inoue was sick and probably mad at the world, eager to make herself appear as the victim but not exposing herself fully. And when she came back, she had full access to gossip and all, not to mention that Ulquiorra had admitted she had access to Soi's record. There was a malicious rumor about her, yes, but it could've been released just to throw people off, not to mention that it would get her a lot of attention.

Soi often found herself wondering if she oughtn't confront the girl, and every time she decided to do so, something stopped her. For some reason or another, the idea of Orihime being mean with people she had loved didn't sit well with her. She cared for her friends too much to see them suffer at her own account. What was more, Inoue had broken her arm in the summer – while it wasn't impossible to write with only one arm, the hand-drawn portraits of the Momokawa Academy drama couldn't have been made by a person whose working arm was in a cast.

She couldn't share her suspicions with Sun-sun either, too paranoid that the muckraker that wrote that garbage kept an eye on her, trying to see if their provocation had hit home. Little did she know that Sun-sun was doing some checking out of her own.

* * *

**A/N - I haven't forgotten this story. I haven't.**

**Alter ego: Yeah, you keep telling yourself that. Now, let's go watch Colin Firth in a wet shirt.**


	23. They All Fall Down

**Theme song: They All Fall Down by SR-71**

* * *

Though severely challenged time-wise, Sun-sun kept both eyes and ears open for a clue, just one slip that would help her find the person behind the Chronicles. Usually, that would not have been much of a problem – she had gotten used to being ignored, invisible, first at home and then at school. She never minded the fact that she was almost inexistent, she had even embraced it. If she was less honorable, she would have easily become a snitch, just as bad as that muckraker that wrote the Chronicles.

However, after the latest issue Sun-sun couldn't go to the bathroom without being stared and pointed at. Hell, she couldn't sit down without seeing some offensive remark written about her. _Sun's a dyke, that's how she gets her A's._ Such messages appeared all the time, in her books, in her locker, in her desk, on the inside of the bathroom door, constantly digging their thorns into her heart. Once or twice, she barely made it home, where she allowed herself a good cry in the privacy of her room.

And Soi's silence didn't make things any better. Sun-sun knew her reasons, but it didn't make it any less painful. She longed for a friend, someone she could confide in without fear of exposure, but the more the rumor of her secret lesbian relationship with her teacher sunk in, the more Sun-sun realized just how bad were the Japanese's attitudes towards homosexuals. Some of the notes she got were downright threatening. _You deserve to have your hair chopped off. Someone ought to teach you a lesson. Why don't you just die!_

Sun-sun was a woman, raised to depend on herself alone, never to expect sympathy, never to want coddling or comfort, but more than anything, she wanted to run to Soi Fong and hide with her somewhere away from the whole world.

* * *

The frustration only fueled her viciousness towards the muckraker and she found herself waking up every day with murderous thoughts on her mind. In that state of mind, Sun-sun received the next entry in the Chronicles:

"ART TEACHER SEDUCES BRILLIANT MICHELANGELO – OKINAWA STRIKES AT LAST" screamed the line in large bold letters, hanging over the story of an outsider boy from a dysfunctional household that sought refuge in his paintings. The scandalous, rude teacher Okinawa sensei took advantage of the boy's emotional vulnerability and pushed him to draw more and more provocative things, encouraging him to spy on people in their most private moments and then record them on paper. At the same time, the evil teacher manipulated the boy until he was on the brick of madness with confusion and sexual frustration, and then took him.

It didn't take much to recognize Nnoitra-sensei and Tesla in these so-called fictional characters, or realize why they had been chosen. The item about Sun-sun and Soi Fong had made a big splash, stirring issues about homosexuality and power trips, and the muckraker couldn't resist to feed his audience another such scandal. Only he had gone too far. Way, way too far.

Sun-sun was furious. Picking on her was one thing, she had done things that could've pissed off some people. But Tesla? Tesla, who had never hurt a fly in his life, Tesla who was too afraid to speak because he always got beaten down… how could that monster do that to him? She wished to have that jerk in front of her so that she could beat all his teeth out.

Naturally, the school was buzzing with it. The only good aspect of it was that the Winter Holiday was only three days away, Sun-sun thought, everyone would have two weeks to forget about the offending item, and the muckraker would have enough time to think of another scandal. Only, with the way things were going, Apache was probably next on the hit list, or maybe Loli and Menoli. It occurred to her that this person seemed to have a bit of a grudge with the Aizen family, never forgetting to drag them down into the mud. It didn't matter that Sun-sun herself thought that her family was as fucked up as a Thomas Hardy novel, there were just some things people that were better left private.

Poor Tesla, however, did not have his father's cold-bloodedness, or had had any chance to develop an immunity to people's mockeries. After being called a fag several times, he fled home, not caring what Momo would say about his sudden arrival. Sun-sun didn't say anything when her classmates teased her, and Luppi wasn't much help, sneering at everyone contemptuously. Her brother's only response to the whole business had been: "Someone must be very sad and bored to think of such nonsense and you're all idiots for believing them." It was a good philosophy, but it didn't help things.

Soi Fong left the room quickly, so Sun-sun couldn't talk to her, even under the pretext of homework, but the girl had already started formulating a plan. The only way to catch that muckraker was to talk to his "victims", see if there were truthful rumors and compare experiences. This far, Sun-sun hadn't been able to do that because nobody would ever confess to having done something shameful, even to another sinner. Hell, Sun-sun herself would have never confessed her love for Soi Fong if Ulquiorra hadn't guessed it himself. But Ulquiorra was a doctor – a man who was trained not to care about gender, race, sexual orientation, a man who was supposed to be completely objective. He had made it perfectly clear that he didn't judge her before she confessed.

Not many people would do that. But now the muckraker had aimed at a person who really didn't give a shit for others' opinions.

* * *

Sun-sun paused in front of the art room, wondering if Nnoitra-sensei would be eating lunch there or in one of the restaurants around the place. Her hesitating was put to a stop when a loud curse resounded from the supplies room.

She went in, and ended up waist deep in chaos.

Tables were upturned, paintings lied on all sides, cans of paint were spilled. In the middle of it all stood Nnoitra, hands balled on his sides and cursing in a way that would make a sailor blush. He didn't seem to notice her until she cleared her throat, and when he did, he whirled around, looking so mad she was worried he might hurt her.

"Motherfucker." He hissed, before he recognized her. "Oh, it's you." His posture relaxed slightly, but Sun-sun couldn't help but feel slightly scared. He looked like a spider, reclining in his nets, waiting for a fly to be caught so that he could strike it. Pissed at the world, she thought, and rightly so. She began to regret her decision to come.

"I'm sorry, sensei. I didn't mean to startle you." She said.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. What do you want, Sun-sun?" he asked as he bent down to righten a table from the floor.

"Um, I just…" she paused as she noticed a picture in her feet. It was half-smeared with red paint, but she recognized her brother's pencil work. It was a drawing of a naked woman, masturbating. Her eyes widened as she noticed a brief resemblance to herself, but she buried the sick feeling away. "What happened here?" she asked suddenly, her voice hoarse.

"Do I look like I know?" Nnoitra asked as he shuffled around the room, putting cans up, gathering ruined works, trying to determine which ones were salvageable. His eyes were narrowed and his jaw was set firmly, but his hand trembled as he swept it gently over the paper. "I came from the old man's office and found this mess. Bastards!" he hissed, his face the epitome of anger. "Fucking bastards." He whirled around and glared at her "Did you know what I found? Do you?" he plunged his hand in his pocket and held out a note, written in black market. It said "Pedophile". Sun-sun swallowed, feeling the bile rise in her throat, a natural response against the hatred. She got one of her own notes from the pocket of her winter blazer. Nnoitra gave it a brief stare, before nodding stiffly and putting the offending paper away. "So you got your own problems too?"

"Yes." She said.

"And I expect you want to ask me if I know anything?"

"I hoped you could."

"Well, I can't." Nnoitra grabbed another stack of papers and leafed through them. "I don't know what's gotten into everybody, but this school was just waitin' for an opportunity to blow up, and now they got it."

"I'm sorry about the room." She said, not knowing what to say. Nnoitra snorted contemptuously.

"Sorry, huh. You mean that or you're just saying it for sayin's sake?" he glared at her, his eyes full of emotion "A few mean notes are nothing, Sun-sun. This here, this is the hard work, not only of your brother, but of many, many students. All these people, pouring time and effort and sweat and blood in these works, only to have them smashed in a few minutes by some fucker with a baseball and hormone issues. It makes me sick." He sneered. "What I wouldn't do to get my hands to these little cowards. Not just that fucker that uses the Internet to hide their smarmy face, but those kids that think they're so big, coming in when I'm not around and leaving petty little notes."

"That's why I want it to end." She said, taking a chance "I'm tired of my secrets being thrown into the light for people's amusement."

Nnoitra turned around and looked at her, long and hard. His face was serious.

"Oh, so now you're confessing? You're telling me that the shit about you and Soi Fong was all real hoping that I in turn will go on and tell you what is true and what is not? Do you really want to hear it? Maybe you're that smarmy fucker yourself."

"Why would I do that?" Sun-sun asked.

"Why would you need a reason? Attention? Getting back at people? Making your father mad? Your brother really wanted to defy him…" Nnoitra said "If the poor kid wasn't so badly beaten down, maybe he would have. But you're gutsy. You're bold. Nothing stops you."

"Petty internet gossip is not my style." She said firmly.

"And that's all the assurance you have?"

"I don't care what you think, it's the truth." She began to scream, but remembered that he was a teacher and composed herself "I'm sorry, sensei."

"You're not sorry, but I like your hypocrisy." Nnoitra said with a grim little smile "You're fickle and evil and mean-streaked. You'll make a good politician."

"I actually want to be a doctor."

"I pity your future patients." Nnoitra said "But what's written in that journal is rubbish. I never influenced your brother on anything, nor did I fuck him or whatever you think I did to him. The kid's got talent. I tried to convince your old man to let him develop it, but your dad wants him to be a politician or something. Fool's notion, but he's the one handling the money. Tesla only talked to me once about anything personal, afterwards. He told me he hated your dad, your whole family, his life and wished for nothing but die. I told him not to be an idiot and fight on. It was the week when you were in England."

Sun-sun thought about it. "Did anyone hear you when you spoke?"

"No. The kid came all the way to my house." Nnoitra said.

She felt more questions come up, but strangled them and helped him put the room into order instead. By the time they were done, the first bell had rang.

* * *

Sun-sun itched to leave Soi a note in her homework, but felt it foolish to exchange those silly things when there was nothing to say. She skipped the fencing practice and headed home, hoping to catch Tesla alone and talk to him about everything. She knew Momo was invited to a tea ceremony that afternoon, so it was the perfect time.

As she got off the bus in her neighborhood, she felt like she had stepped in an alternate universe. There had been a small snow storm during the day, which had covered the ground with an unblemished cloak of white. The houses were sleepy, all the neighbors gone to work or submerged in their own lives. No children or dogs playing in the street. Not a sound came. Sun-sun felt like the last person on Earth, completely and utterly abandoned. Even her breath, coming out in short gasps, sounded too loud in her ears.

Overcome by a sudden dread, Sun-sun sped her pace up, breaking into a near run when her house came into view. She turned the doorknob and, finding it unlocked, she burst through the house, not even bothering to take her shoes off as she ran up the stairs, towards her brother's room. She opened the door and walked into a nightmare.


	24. Would It Matter

**Theme song: Would It Matter by Skillet**

* * *

Soi thought that she was doing good in her game of avoidance, and Sun-sun was doing even better. They had successfully managed not to raise suspicion, and Yamamoto had left her off the hook because he had found a new victim in Nnoitra. She was almost certain they'd be able to make it through the next two months unscathed.

They needed to talk, think of a strategy. Sun-sun's no-show at the fencing practice gave Soi a perfect excuse to do so, but since she couldn't wait until the morning, she had taken a taxi to her home. Maybe she was pushing her luck, but Soi was sure that it was a valid excuse enough in front of Aizen Momo.

She paid the man, who grumbled about the snow and wondered how he could turn around in the dirty street, and headed for the house. Soi paused when she noticed that the door was already open and then broke into a run when she saw it open. Sun-sun stumbled out, her hands full of her brother Tesla. Her young face was alight with panic and there were big red blotches on her white school uniform.

She looked up and her eyes lit up with recognition:

"Sensei…" she whispered in a small voice as her knees buckled. Soi came to a stumbling stop in front of them.

"Sun, are you ok?" She grabbed her shoulders, looking for signs of injuries.

"Not me. Tesla…" the girl's voice broke and she let out a sob. Soi looked down and, for the first time, noticed that the boy's hands were wrapped in towels that were quickly turning red.

"Shit." She cursed and shrugged out of her jacket. She threw it over the boy, before running towards the cab that still hadn't turned. The man was about to drive away, when she slammed her hands on the hood and made him jump.

"Damn it, lady!" he yelled, but his eyes widened when he saw the bloodied children.

"We need to get to a hospital." Soi ordered in an icy voice as Sun-sun dragged her half-conscious brother towards the car "I'll pay you triple if you get us there in less than a minute."

* * *

One hour, Soi and Sun-sun sat side by side on a cot, watching doctors and nurses run around the ER, white coats and scrubs floating around like wings. They looked like ghosts.

Neither spoke, and they had barely moved. Sun-sun had only gotten up to call her father and tell him about what had happened. Aizen Sosuke had flown in the ER two minutes later, barely given them a look before finding the nearest doctor and asking for his son. Momo was nowhere to be seen. Sun-sun wondered what would her mother think when she arrived back from the tea ceremony and found the blood stains all over the house… probably wonder how much it would cost to get the carpets dry cleaned. Momo was like that – appearances first and foremost. And her brothers, her sisters… they would probably have a heart attack, and then get a kick out of it all.

The young woman rubbed her tired eyes. She felt disgusting, dirty and disgusting, but she didn't dare go home. She had this strange fear that if she left her hospital her brother would die. She knew it was irrational, since they were sitting there for an hour and nobody had deigned to tell her how he was, but nobody had told her he was worse, so she wasn't willing to let it go.

Soi Fong's hand rested on her shoulder and the girl looked up at her sensei with tired eyes. The two women shared a long, silent glance, before letting go and assuming a professional distance. Soi's coat was gone, probably thrown away when Tesla was taken away on a stretcher. She stood there in a sweater and scarf, her hands slightly bloodied.

They noticed the Aizen patriarch walk towards them and automatically straightened up. Sun-sun seemed to realize the blood stains on her uniform and hands for the first time, but it was too late to hide them. She looked at her father with fear.

Aizen Sosuke looked different than he usually did. His face was ashen, sick, set in small lines, and his lips were pressed tightly together. He looked much older than before, and the eyes behind his glasses were sullen. He seemed to have a hard time keeping his composure as he came up to them:

"You were not taken care of until now." He stated, before sighing gravely "The doctors said it looked like he cut his own hands. What do you know of this, Sun-sun?"

"I don't know. I came home early, I wasn't feeling up for fencing…" she looked at Soi Fong apologetically "I saw that the door was open and went up to see what was wrong. He was sitting on the bathroom floor with the razor and his hands were all cut up."

Her father nodded, too worried to doubt her story. Then he looked at Soi Fong. "Sensei, what were you doing there?"

"I wanted to see why Sun-sun hadn't shown up on practice. I had some work in the neighborhood, so I had taken a cab. When I got out, Sun-sun was carrying Tesla out. I hauled them over here."

He nodded again. Then he sat down briefly. Then he got up again.

"The doctors said that the cuts weren't deep, but they were numerous. A little more and he…" Aizen squeezed his lips against the thought "Sun-sun, I won't ask you why you weren't feeling up to fencing, but we'll have to have a long talk at home about that nonsense they write on the web. And sensei…" he looked at Soi straight in the eye, and to her credit, she looked straight back him, unwavering "I do not believe what has been written there, not a word. You are a sensible, smart woman of strong values. If it hadn't been for Sun-sun and your quick thinking, my son may not be alive right now. I am grateful to you." He bowed slightly, but when he looked up, his eyes were cold and distant as a river's stones.

"I'm glad I was of service." Soi, though reluctant stood up "I wanted to talk to Sun-sun, but I see that this is not the right time. I will leave now." She gave the girl one apologetic look, before walking out the door briskly.

* * *

Out in the cold, she nearly ran into Nnoitra who, hands flailing, had just jumped off a taxi and was running towards the entrance. He noticed her and changed his course:

"How's the boy?" he asked.

"Alive. His father and Sun-sun are with him." Soi replied curtly.

"Damn it." he thrust his hands in his pockets and kicked the snow. "Guess they won't let me see him."

"Guess not. His father's there." Soi let out a sigh "He says he doesn't believe the Chronicles, but just his mentioning of them shows that he's been reading them. It'll be wise for you to not show up."

Nnoitra frowned and kicked the snow. Soi stared at him for a while, before glancing at her watch. "It's past five. How about a drink?"

"Sure, why not." He shrugged.

One or two or a few whiskeys later, the two of them were slumped on the opposite sides of a table in some dingy bar near the hospital, too tired to speak, worry, or even think. The owner, waitresses, even some of the patrons cast a curious glance at them every few minutes. They did make a strange couple – the tall, spider-like man with a skeletal sneer and the petite, frowning woman. It occurred to Soi that it was the first time she'd been in a strange company since college, before she sank back into an alcoholic stupor. If she was going to go all the way with Sun-sun, she was going to have to get used to strange looks, she mused.

"Know what pisses me off?" Nnoitra asked. "Other than them cowards who messed up the supplies room?"

He had recounted to her the incident between drinks one and two, as well as his conversation with Sun-sun. Soi was too busy marveling how Nnoitra could talk like a normal human being to care that Sun-sun had basically told him that they had made love in Oxford.

"What?" she played along.

"That people actually believe this crap. Smart people, like my colleagues and Aizen Sosuke. They read it and they believe it, as if they were hormone-filled and sex deprived just as much as the kids. Old man Yamamoto called me down to his office, for fuck's sake!"

Soi rolled her eyes: "Won't be the last time. He called me down several times as well."

"Yeah, but did Sun-sun slit her wrists over it?" Nnoitra asked in a low murmur that sounded almost like a hiss. Though halfway in the bag, the man was nowhere near the "I love the world, gimme a hug" stage of drunkenness. He was as sharp as a needle. "Especially since it's true."

"Let's not get into circumstances." Soi replied tartly "What pissed you off about getting called down?"

"Because of what I said. The old man isn't a moron, but he called me down to his office. His office, god fucking damn it, like I was some delinquent drawing graffiti in the bathroom. And after a decade of teaching! I have a fucking MA from the Institute of Madrid! That counts for somethin', innit?"

"Probably." Soi thought about her measly four years of teaching experience and wondered if they would count for something.

"Ten fucking years I give to the damned brats, and how do they repay me? They jump my throat as soon as they're given the chance." Nnoitra went on "And instead of punishing them, the damned principle calls me down to his office. After ten years, well, shit!"

Soi nodded and drank her whiskey. The waitress, guessing their intention, brought them new ones. After a while, Nnoitra opened his mouth again:

"You bisexual?"

She glared: "Why'd you ask that?"

"Well, I know you're a dyke since Sun-sun's a girl, but didn't you get cozy with Kuchiki a while back? How'd you deal with him when he wanted to get his jollies, offered a hand job instead?"

"No, I fucked him as well." She said, wondering just how obvious Byakuya had been about their relationship. Was that why Unohana didn't speak to her anymore? Soi was suddenly startled to realize that she hadn't spoken to the biology teacher in months. She made a mental note to see to that. "Why are you curious?"

"Well, I'm drunk, you're drunk, we're both here…" he trailed off, wriggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"A dick isn't all it takes." She replied.

"Thought so." Nnoitra nodded, picking his drink up again "Same here."

She gave him a long look over the rims of her glasses and leaned back: "Now, it's your turn. Is what you told Sun-sun really true? That you were never inappropriate in front of her brother?"

"Depends on what you'd call inappropriate. People tend to run in the other direction as soon as they see me." Nnoitra swung the whiskey in his glass and watched the light reflect in pale ochre, orange, red, like the flames of a fire. "Tesla's drawings are far from pretty landscapes and cuddly bunnies, but they're full of imagination and life. People think nudity is perverse and that if they never acknowledge certain things it would be as if they never existed. Which is nothing but a big pile of horse dung, but who the hell am I to judge. Anyways, Tesla brought those things out into the light, and I encouraged him. So, as far as inappropriate goes, all I did was telling him he wasn't doing anything essentially wrong."

But there was a difference between essentially and technically. Essentially, there was nothing shameful in nudity, after all, humans weren't born clothed, but technically society, especially one as conservative as the Japanese, frowned upon it. Soi pondered this. Nnoitra wasn't guilty for pushing his own morality code, just like she couldn't help loving Sun-sun, but there was a significant difference between the two of them. Sun-sun was smart, well-read and shrewd – she knew the responsibilities of a relationship and was ready to take on people's scorn. But a boy as emotionally vulnerable as Tesla was, failure had much more dire consequences. He had sought assurance and found it in the face of his teacher, but when his classmates had turned on him, he had had it crumble to dust. He truly must've felt like the world was ending, Soi thought.

They didn't speak again until, much later, she helped a now very drunk Nnoitra into a cab and told the driver his address. As they took off, his head fell in her lap and she heard him murmur something that made her blood go cold: "I accused Sun-sun of being the muckraker. I bet she is."

* * *

**A/N - Anyone there?**


	25. Behind Blue Eyes

Theme song: Behind Blue Eyes by Limp Bizkit

* * *

The next two days were quiet. The news of Tesla's accident (the official theory was that he had fallen through a glass table) had acted as a sort of sobering to the school and the children seemed to have taken a break from their hate fest. Nobody breathed a word of insult to Sun-sun or any other of the Aizen-children, and even the muckraker didn't have anything to say about it.

It wasn't like everyone had suddenly realized the error of their ways and were remodeling themselves into perfectly tolerant and pleasing people. Quite the contrary, Tesla's accident just provided the school with another excuse to show off its hypocrisy. The other art teacher (Nnoitra had given his students a Christmas present by calling in sick the last two days before Christmas) had all of the freshmen in his class prepare drawings and get-well cards for the boy, a small group of upperclassmen gathered money for a fruits basket, and even Yamamoto advised the teachers to talk about life in homeroom.

Some teachers were pretty vocal in their opinions on the subject, with the latter varying between full support of the principle ("We must stick together in these sad times!"), to a full rejection ("Why's this accident so overblown?"). Others, like Soi, preferred to keep quiet, never objecting the initiatives, but never taking part of them either, though for different reasons. Byakuya thought it was unsightly. Grimmjaw thought it was stupid. Unohana thought it was untactful.

* * *

The latter had given her opinion only to Soi on the night of the second day. Although Soi Fong wasn't even sure Unohana would be pleased to see her, because they'd been mutually distant these last few months, she got over her insecurities by telling herself that it wasn't fair of her to treat her old friend like that. Besides, she had made a promise, and even drunken promises had to be kept… mostly.

Luckily, Unohana was overjoyed and even a slight bit relieved when Soi had walked into her classroom during the lunch period. She hadn't gone down, so she invited Soi to eat their lunch together in a nearby café. The latter was a little worried that the conversation would halt as soon as they placed their order, but Unohana didn't let it falter at all:

"I'm so glad that you have come today." She said when the waitress scurried away. "It's been so quiet lately, I confess I was dreading the holidays. You wouldn't mind it if we get together some day for tea, would you? I know it's forward, but I am certain I would go mad if I don't speak to a single creature for fourteen days."

"After my previous behavior…" Soi said, astonished "I should be the one asking you if you were comfortable with talking to me."

"That's nonsense." Unohana waved her hand "You've had problems of your own."

Another reader of the Chronicles, Soi thought wearily, although she was kinder than the rest. Instead of elaborating on her troubles, though, she went for the original conversation starter: "But I have been abominable."

"It's ok now." Unohana said. "We have a lot of catching up to do."

Soi stared at her: "But… didn't you go out with Kuchiki-sensei, at least? I thought the two of you were friends."

Unohana smiled sadly: "We had a drink after work once, but he was not in a good mood. I decided not to press him until he was feeling up to it. He never did."

"Oh…" she said lamely, searching for anything to say. Of course, she had a good idea what had caused Byakuya's foul mood, but she couldn't go out and say it. Who knew how much Unohana knew. Such a confession was bound to make her as uncomfortable as Soi had been when Byakuya told her about his offer in detail. So she changed the topic: "Have you gone to see Aizen Tesla in the hospital?" Unohana was his homeroom teacher and, of course, the duty to take a get-well card from the class fell squarely to her shoulders.

"Yes, yesterday." She said "He was sleeping when I went there, so I didn't stay long."

"Wasn't there anyone with them?" a few of the Aizen siblings were conspicuously missing from the school and Soi had naturally assumed they'd be staying with their brother. In retrospect, she realized that they'd have rather used Tesla's illness as an excuse to wander the city un-chaperoned.

"His father, but he wasn't feeling chatty." Unohana's brow creased. "He thanked me for my consideration and told me that Tesla was just too tired and was advised to just sleep it off."

"Aizen-san gives people the impression they are unwelcome even when he claims the opposite." Soi said, after beating her head to find a relatively polite way to say it.

"He does indeed." Unohana agreed. After a long, long pause, she looked at Soi straight in the eye and asked: "Did Kuchiki-san really make you an offer of marriage?"

Soi sputtered and stared, startled.

"I've made you uncomfortable." Unohana stated "I apologize. I know it was rude of me, but I have wanted to know if it was really true for a long time now, and I never had an opportunity to ask."

"It's fine, I'm just surprised." Soi said, wondering if the Chronicles hadn't made a statement about that which she had missed. Then she shook her head to herself – she hated that muckraker, but it would do her no good if she kept getting paranoid about everything and everyone. It was bad enough as it was, to try and function normally without wondering obsessively if she hadn't been sleeping with the enemy all this time (figuratively and in actuality).

As far as Byakuya went, she knew that he had given himself away on plenty of occasions, seeking her out on the school grounds and talking to her in a manner that would've been considered as intimate by the rest of their colleagues, not to mention the botanical garden he had sent her the summer. The reason for their sudden withdrawal was probably obvious. She didn't understand why she was so peeved Unohana knew.

"Nobody else asked you about it before?" the latter asked.

"Not really. I really think it's the last thing on their minds, to ask me about me and Kuchiki-san." Like that secret lesbian relationship that was hinted in the Chronicles. "But to answer your question, yes, he did, at the beginning of the term. I'm afraid that my refusal may have been the reason he was not a pleasant company the last time you saw him." Soi said.

Unohana stared at her as if she had grown a second head. She looked like she wanted to say something, but was too shocked to make the sounds come out. She was silent when the waitress came back with their food, and didn't even acknowledge the girl. Soi frowned. She realized that her friend was surprised, but really, the news didn't merit such an overblown reaction. Finally, Unohana managed:

"You refused him? And here I was thinking all these months that you were engaged."

It was Soi's turn to act as if she had just been slapped:

"Engaged?" she repeated the word, for the first time doubtful of her Japanese. "What gave you that impression?"

"I thought you were just conscious of your situation." Unohana said in a small voice, looking like Catherine Morland and not Eleanor Dashwood. It was a startling change. "The Kuchiki family is known to be very conceited, after all, and with that gossip blog still running everyone is very tense. I thought you had agreed to be discreet about your engagement and steered clear from each other out of fear of exposing your feelings." She blushed as she looked away from Soi "I had noticed that Kuchiki-san was paying you special attention before the summer vacation, and when he stopped seeking my company I assumed you were doing it out of consideration, not to make me feel like a third wheel."

Meanwhile, Soi was flummoxed. Not just because that this was probably the longest speech she had ever heard Unohana make, but also because she was too surprised. Why had her friend thought that? Had Byakuya been telling her something he oughtn't have? Of course, Soi was happy there was at least one creature in the school that laughed at the idea of her being in an illegal relationship with a much younger female student, but why had she exchanged it for an idea like that. It was positively wild, hardly something a logical woman like Unohana Retsu would come up with.

And then she noticed it – the flushed cheeks, the bright eyes, the eager countenance… Unohana was hanging onto her every word and she wasn't even trying to hide it. Soi needed no more than a second to figure the reason out.

She was in love with Byakuya.

_Of course! No, really, of course! _Soi couldn't believe she had been as stupid as to not having seen it before. It explained everything – Unohana's easy acceptance of their distance, her eagerness for reconciliation, her questions… her pain when Byakuya had callously rejected her company, not to mention her extravagant ideas. They were exactly the brand of do-gooder, I-want-him-to-be-happy, this-is-the-best-for-all-of-us ideas women fed themselves when faced with unrequited love and tried to get out of it with their dignity in one piece.

How could have Soi not seen it? What made it worse was the fact that Unohana had probably been in love with their stoic colleague for years, but had never acted on the impulse. Or, perhaps, she had been too polite and subtle about it, worried not to destroy their easy friendship with imposing feelings that may or may not be reciprocated. And there was Soi, coming in their school after being kicked out from her previous working place, young and out of place, butting into their group and snugging Byakuya for herself.

Soi felt embarrassment creep into her bones. God, what kind of a fool had she been! If she hadn't been so absorbed into her own little world of angst, she would have surely seen Unohana's attachment and done something about it. Well, maybe not, but she certainly wouldn't have seduced Byakuya… or agreed to sleep with him… she didn't know what had happened exactly, the events had blurred together slightly. Shame overcame everything – it was one of those moments when she was slapped with the consequences of her selfish actions. She hadn't slept with Byakuya because she had loved him, or even because she was impossibly horny and lonely – she had used him like she had used her fiancé in America, as a beard, a façade for the world and herself, and when she had finally faced what was beyond the pretense, she had dropped him, completely oblivious to just how many people she hurt.

In a fit of guilt, she vowed to set things right, even though she didn't know how exactly. Reaching over the table, she grasped Unohana's hand, a very bold gesture by Japanese standards, and squeezed it affectionately:

"I am sorry you had to be alone all these months." She said sincerely "And I'm sorry I didn't come earlier. But don't try to make me the good guy here – I was just selfish and egoistic. I never accepted Byakuya's offer."

Unohana stared at her for a long time, before squeezing her hand back. "I'm just glad to have a friend back." She whispered.

* * *

Later that day, Soi took the money her class had gathered and bought a small bouquet to carry to Tesla. She would have scowled at the hypocrisy of the gesture if she hadn't wanted to speak to Sun-sun. For real this time.

She had successfully managed to ignor Nnoitra's statement, even when it had eaten away almost all the self-assurance she had in their relationship, but there were some things Sun-sun needed to answer to. For one thing, she hadn't been very clear about the reasons that had made her skip fencing practice and go home early. And while the sudden arrival had prevented a tragedy from happening, Soi couldn't help but feel there was something extremely convenient in it all, not to mention the muckraker's conspicuous silence these last few days. How could he look down on this bloody scandal and not have anything to say about it, if he was not personally affected by it.

Luckily for Soi, Aizen Sosuke was not in the hospital when she arrived, and Sun-sun was sitting by her brother's bedside. They nodded to each other and Soi set the flowers in a plastic vase, before turning around to look at the boy.

Tesla was sleeping. For a moment, Soi stared at him, absorbing his aspect, wondering if he was truly asleep or he was just faking it to ward off unwanted visitors. But no, his breath was even and his eyeballs moved underneath the pale lids, indicating that he was deep into dreamland.

The look of him startled Soi. He'd always been small and quiet, but she'd never really noticed it, the unhealthy pallor of his skin, the dark shadows underneath his eyes, the nervous twitching of his hands from time to time. He may not have been abused by Nnoitra, Soi thought, but he'd definitely lived in fear before. She thought about it – always eager to please, always living under the burden of the huge expectations, living in fear of failure… desperate for approval, for affection, Tesla wasn't much different than herself. Soi thought about Unohana's reports. Aizen Sosuke had been at his son's bedside, probably faint with fear that the boy might die, but he hadn't batted an eyelash about sending his daughter to England with only her teacher as chaperon.

Instead of respecting the silence and going away like her colleagues, Soi pulled a chair and sit down with Sun-sun.

"How's he doing?" she asked in a whisper.

"Fine. Sleeping mostly." Sun-sun said, rubbing her tired eyes. She had a hard time sleeping these last few days. Every time she did, she saw blood and snow in all sorts of red-on-white patterns that made her feel sick. Her father had been blissfully quiet about the whole thing and she hoped that he was trying to make it go away by simply not thinking about it. Soi's presence made her feel slightly better, but when she noticed her teacher's dark look, the girl felt her spirits sinking again. "I'm glad you came." She offered.

"I wanted to see how you were doing." Soi replied, feeling slightly queasy that she was talking so easily by a sick person's bed. As if he was dead. It made her shiver. "I didn't manage to help you at all the other day."

"No, you just helped me get him to the hospital in time. You saved him." Sun-sun said.

It was on the tip of Soi's tongue to ask her if she was the one writing those items, but she couldn't. Not when they were standing by this bed, in this eerie, quiet room, staring stiffly at the wall and avoiding the bed at all costs, as if they were on a wake. It somehow made Soi feel intrusive to try and force a confession out of Sun-sun, especially since she felt it would be a huge mistake. Sun-sun loved her brother and was fiercely overprotective of him. There was no way she could have done anything to hurt him, and, when she thought back on it, she congratulated herself on having controlled her tongue.

At present, she just reached over to touch Sun-sun's shoulder. The girl exhaled, as if she had been holding her breath for too long, and melted against the touch.

Soi bent her head and kissed her long.

* * *

A/N - Comments are always welcome.


	26. Morgenstern

Sun-sun was a zombie in the next morning. She got up early, dressed in her uniform, exited the house… only to stop in front of the school gates and find them locked. They were officially in a winter holiday.

Closing her eyes, she let out a small curse and banged her head against the door. Next thing she knew, she'd be going out in her nightgown and talking to the birds.

She took several deep breaths. The air was freezing, making her teeth, throat and lungs hurt, but it was good. It was refreshing. She could feel her sanity starting to return to her in slow, painful snippets, and then more quickly, but at that moment, the walk home felt like a task that was beyond her capabilities.

Everything hurt. Her head hurt, her throat hurt, her legs burned and she couldn't help but feel like the world was spinning. She remembered off-handedly that she had forgotten to eat breakfast. Well then, the lightheadedness made sense. Not enough blood sugar. Sun-sun rubbed a hand over her eyes, took another deep breath and straightened up. There was a little supermarket near the school. She could buy a coke or something, and sit in the park until her head stopped spinning. She didn't want to attempt to go back home yet. With her luck, she was going to land herself in the hospital, and the last thing she needed was to be incapacitated.

Hospital…

The throbbing in her temples increased and she gritted her teeth to keep the discomfort at bay. She didn't need it. Weakness was not to be tolerated.

Of course, she knew the reason why she was a mess. You had to be blind, deaf and stupid not to. The whole family had taken turns to stay with Tesla at the hospital, some less than others, but Sun-sun was second after her father in the hours she'd spent by Tesla's bedside. It wasn't reasonable, but she wasn't doing it out of sisterly affection anyway. She wasn't sitting with him because she was feeling guilty, either.

Ok… maybe she was feeling a little guilty. But she realized she would have felt guiltier if she had chosen to stay at practice just so that she could see Soi, instead of going back straight home.

Besides, she had seen Soi, only not in a very pleasant circumstance.

The young woman rubbed her hand over her eyes and purchased her drink. Then she found a bench in the park and sat there for a while, just staring at the unmarred snow.

Blinding white… like the lab coats. And the sheets. And her brother's face.

She gritted her teeth. Stupid. She should have gone home and slept it all off. Instead, she had let her petty fears get the better of her and she had pushed herself until she couldn't go on anymore. Foolish. And yet whenever she closed her eyes all she saw was the blood, making strange patterns on the snow, red on white.

Enough! Sun-sun took a swing of coke and looked around. People were starting to come in the park, runners, couples, mothers with children. The sun was shining bright. It was relatively warm.

She wrapped the scarf tighter around her neck and prepared to leave when a flash of silver and green caught her eye. Curious as to the unusual color, she stared in that direction, to see no one other than Jiruga Neliel loitering around the lake. That wasn't an unusual site, since the girl enjoyed the park, but she wasn't skipping down the lanes or peering over the railing into the lake like she usually did. She was sitting under a tree, her knees folded under her, eyes focused in the distance.

Sun-sun wondered if she ought to walk away. She was in no mood to chat, and by the looks of it, neither was Neliel. But something in her made the Aizen girl stop and look again. She truly looked miserable. And something, that innate tendency women had to sniffing out lies, made Sun-sun suspect something she should have known all along.

She walked up to her. Neliel saw her coming, but didn't look up. That alone was confirmation enough.

Reaching in her blazer pocket, Sun-sun retrieved a handful of the hate notes she had received earlier that month and promptly dropped them in Neliel's lap. "I hope you're satisfied." She said, her voice as cold as ice.

Neliel still wouldn't look up. Her lips moved, but no sound came out. She swallowed hard and mumbled: "I'm sorry."

Sun-sun closed her eyes and counted to ten. Then she counted again. Even still, she couldn't calm herself. "Is that all you will say?" her voice rose by a whole octave as she glared at the other girl with unadulterated hatred. "You're sorry? I don't think you understand the magnitude of what you did. Sorry doesn't even begin to cover it."

"I know…" the other girl nodded weakly "But I'm still sorry. I didn't know it would turn out like this."

"How could you have known, if you didn't think about anything else but yourself and your petty gossip? What did you hope to achieve by throwing everyone's private lives out in the open? That people would praise you as some sort of hero? That your amazing talent as a journalist would be recognized? Writing petty gossip achieves nothing, but that is irrelevant as you didn't even bother to put your name under the trash you were writing!"

"I told you I didn't think it would happen like that. The newspaper lost all funds, I couldn't afford to let it die. The Chronicles are a fictional account, and when I saw that people read them, I decided to keep them up…"

"You can hardly call anything a fictional account when you see how others recognize themselves in it. You can't call it a fictional account when you put so little effort into hiding what this really is." Neliel opened her mouth, but Sun-sun cut her off "Forget it! I hope you bought yourself something nice with that money you got at other people's expense!"

"What will you have me say?" Neliel looked up, eyes blazing "That I am filth? That I can't look at myself in the mirror, because I'm afraid of my guilt? That I can't sleep at night?"

"No, that's what I'm doing, because I keep by my brother's bedside nearly every waking moment." Sun-sun snapped.

Neliel deflated, her anger extinguishing like a candle in the wind. "I never thought they would react like this." She whispered, pained "I'm sorry! Believe me, I was horrified when my brother told me about it. I spent a wretched night, and wanted to go over and apologize, but I was afraid you'd rip me to bits then and there."

Sun-sun stared at her – she was nothing like the vibrant, cheerful girl who had once tried talking her into writing for the school paper. Hair limp, eyes dead, Neliel was a picture of misery. Sun-sun found herself wanting, seriously wanting, to do the right thing and forgive her, accept that people made mistakes and swallow it. But she couldn't. This selfishness, this reckless neglect of other people's feelings, was something she had lived with her entire life and was not going to forgive. And the anger, the blinding, searing anger, felt better than anything she had had in her entire life:

"How could you do this?" She asked, her voice incredulous "I get it that some of those people might have slighted you in the past, that I turned you down when you asked me to help you for the paper, but how could you write this trash about Tesla and Nnoitra-sensei? Your own brother, Neliel! He was called down to the principle's office because of this! He could lose his job!" Soi Fong as well, she thought, but didn't voice that thought "How could you do that?"

"I wasn't doing it out of spite." Neliel pleaded "I swear, I wasn't. At first I was writing things that were common knowledge, like that stuff about Ise-sensei and Kyoraku-sensei. Then I started finding things out… and whenever I met a stumbling block, I just finished it myself. I thought that by writing lies, it would be less like cheap gossip and more like fiction, but…"

"But people got so tangled up in your world that they couldn't tell lies from the truth." Sun-sun finished coldly.

"No. They couldn't." Neliel swallowed hard "I thought about bringing it down a notch, but when I found that folder in Ulquiorra-sensei's office, I got worried about you. If Soi Fong really was an abusive molester and you were all alone in England…"

"Soi Fong-sensei is a woman with a long teaching experience, upstanding moral and strong personal values, which is a lot more than I can say about you." Sun-sun seethed "And don't try to push that shit about trying to bring things down. You wrote that stuff that slanders Orihime as well, and you know the girl doesn't need another vicious rumor to deal with!"

"That's exactly what I said! I wanted to bring it down, so I only wrote things that were true. I saw them! On the cot in the doctor's office!" sincere shock painted the girl's features, and for a moment, Sun-sun's mind also went blank. But then she realized that Orihime was eighteen, and whatever she did was her own business.

"It wasn't your problem. You shouldn't have made it everyone's business. But other than that, the number you wrote about your brother and Tesla was also false."

Neliel swallowed: "I know. I came home just as Nnoitra was seeing Tesla out. I didn't say anything, but the boy looked really upset. And the house was a mess… I couldn't help but assume…"

"You assumed wrong. But leaving that aside, Nnoitra-sensei is your brother."

"If he was in the wrong, I couldn't just ignore it." Neliel said, her young face flushed with frustration. She truly believed herself to be some sort of angel of justice, Sun-sun thought with disgust.

"But are you seriously thinking you're doing people a favor by airing out their dirty laundry for the world to see?"

"They wouldn't do anything about their problems unless they are forced to face them." Neliel reasoned, and Sun-sun had to agree there was a point in there somewhere.

"Still, you can't just go off and saying things like that, without even checking to see if they're true. You saw what happened to Tesla because of your callous behavior. And I may not have slit my wrists, but I am also hurt by what people do to me because of your ridiculous article. A bull-in-a-china-shop approach is not what will make people change their ways, Nel, and you aren't making it better by hiding your name. You just look like a nasty gossipmonger, not like a do-gooder."

Neliel bowed her head. "What will you have me do? I'll do anything to make it up for what happened."

Sun-sun shook her head. "I can't."

"Please!" The girl looked up, eyes beseeching "I'll do anything to make it up!"

"I'm not saying it because I want to be a bitch. I'm not the one you should be making this up." Sun-sun turned to leave "You better apologize to those people, Nel."

* * *

Sun-sun dragged herself out of the park and headed towards the bus stop, when she suddenly changed course. The hospital was in front of her before she knew it. She considered calling her folks and telling them she'd be sitting with Tesla again, when she noticed a tall man pacing the floor of the waiting room.

She paused. He seemed oddly familiar, even though his back was slightly hunched and his brow was creased with worry. She couldn't remember his name, but she was certain she had met him. But where? How? Sun-sun couldn't tell. He was too old to be a schoolmate. His features were sharp, feline-like, a little like Soi Fong's, which made her wonder if he was perhaps a relative. But Soi had never shown her pictures of her family, so that possibility dropped off. Besides, his eyes were golden-brown, not ice blue like her sensei's. And his hair, though the same shade of black, was like a messy mop on top of his head. His body was also slight and feline-like, not…

Suddenly, it hit her. Ggio Vega, her sister Mila-Rose's husband. The one that had knocked her up and was the reason why their father had disowned her. She remembered that Aizen Sosuke had called him an ape, which was not exactly right because the guy was more like a tiger.

Ggio paused, as if he had sensed her stare, and turned around to glare at her. His frown deepened slightly, as he undoubtedly was wondering who she was and tried to place her face. She made her way to him: "Hello, Vega-san. You probably do not remember me. I'm Aizen Sun-sun, Mila-Rose's sister." She said with a polite bow.

"Oh, yeah… you're the quiet one." He said, scratching the back of his head "Thought you seemed familiar."

"What brings you here?" she asked.

"Mila Rose." He said, blushing slightly "Labor pains started at three last night and I had to drive her to the ER before she crushed my skull for getting her in this mess in the first place."

"Oh!" Sun-sun did the calculations quickly in her head and kicked herself for not having guessed "Is she alright?"

"Doctors won't let me see her." He sneered in their general direction "Say I'm upsetting her. I'd give them a piece of my mind, but she looked ready to sprout fangs when they were wheeling her in, so I decided to get out of their way." His eyes settled on her and he frowned "Why are_ you_ here? I don't think she asked the doctors to call your old man."

Sun-sun blushed. "Um, no. I'm visiting. My… younger brother, Tesla, is sick."

"Oh. Sorry to hear that." Ggio looked uncertain, before plopping himself down on the couch and rubbing his hands over his face. Sun-sun sat down opposite of him. He stared at her: "You're not obliged to sit with me, you know."

"I don't know where to go." She admitted "It's too early for visits."

"Huh…" Ggio trailed off "I see."

She rummaged her head for any ideas for small talk. "So... how are you doing?" Ggio gave her a pointed look "I'm just curious."

"So you could tell your dad afterwards? We're just fine. I'm making enough money to support all three of us, and Mila-Rose is going back to school as soon as we can leave the kid at daycare." He groaned and rubbed his eyes again. "Damn it, that sounded too harsh."

"It's understandable. My father treated you rashly. Your opinion of the rest of us is probably not very high."

He eyed her carefully: "You're not as judgmental as I thought you were. You struck me as a little robot back then. Always doing what people told you to." He noticed the uniform "You do what you want to do, don't you?"

_He thinks I was out all night_, she thought with mortification, but didn't try to correct him. "Not always."

"Well good for you." He nodded "Parental insubordination is always the trick. Just wait until you're out of college, ok?"

Sun-sun didn't know what to say. She hadn't been very close with Mila-Rose, never had, and even though she hadn't judged her older sister too harshly for sticking it up to their father, she thought she hadn't chosen the right time either. The present situation wasn't even ironic – Sun-sun was well on her way of following her sister's path, and she couldn't even maintain the façade of a mousy pushover anymore.

The time came for visits, and she stood up.

"I hope everything goes well, Vega-san." She said, bowing politely "Please give my best to Mila-Rose."

Ggio nodded stiffly, before focusing his attention on glaring at the general direction of the maternity ward.

Good man, Sun-sun thought. He didn't try to make her sympathetic, or use the special day to needle her for some extra yen. Or, better yet, a meeting with her father.

Tesla appeared to be asleep, but as soon as she made a few steps into the room, his eyes snapped open: "It's you!" He exclaimed quietly, looking extremely relieved.

"And you're awake." She noted, feeling relief wash over her "I was beginning to worry about you." She pulled a chair and sat down. "You've been asleep for a while."

"Not so long as you might think." He said "I started coming around a few days ago, but I wanted to be left alone, so I pretended to sleep."

Well, that wasn't so unlikely, Sun-sun thought. He sounded well-rested and conscious, so that meant he had probably got a lot more sleep than anyone in their family had these last few days. Still… he didn't look too happy. Oh, he seemed relieved that she was there, but it would've been a gross lie to say he was happy. The look in his eyes was positively miserable.

"Father is angry with me, isn't he?" he said softly, his wide eyes filling with tears "He hates me."

Another woman would have contradicted this statement vehemently. She would have tried to reassure the boy, too scared that he might have another psychotic episode, and tell him that everything was fine, that his father loved him and that they would work things out. But Sun-sun didn't care if her brother had another psychotic episode, she knew he would, so she wasn't overly concerned in sparing his feelings.

"He's worried." She told the truth. "You already know, he sat with you a lot. I don't know about angry."

"He hates me." Tesla whispered "He never liked me because I was never perfect, but now he must hate me. Now that it's all out."

He was so girlish, she thought, so fragile. Maybe in a few years his features would harden and sharpen and become more manly, but at the moment he looked ready to burst into tears.

"If father hates you, then what do you think he feels for Luppi?" She asked all-so-matter-of-factly. Her twin brother was as flamboyant as she was bland.

"Luppi has you to drag him through life. I have nobody." Tesla really did almost burst into tears.

Sun-sun rolled her eyes and gave him a hard look. "Neither do I. Does that mean I go around slitting my wrists?" he ducked his head and she took it as cue to calm herself down. "Why did you do it, Tesla? We both know that this crap N… the Chronicles wrote is a lie."

"But I wanted it." he said, head snapping up "I wanted it and I was thinking about it, every last bit of it. I wanted it so much and they wrote it down just like I had thought it would be. They read my mind, because they know that's exactly what people like me think, and now father will know too. He will throw me out on the street!" His chest was rising and falling rapidly, and now he was going into hysterics. Sun-sun had to slap him to make him calm down.

"They made a guess." She said coldly. "And they were wrong."

"But they weren't wrong about you and Fong-sensei. I remember seeing you two kissing when I first woke up." Sun-sun's cheeks flushed red. "So it's true? You like women?"

"Tesla, it's not so simple a you put it." she shook her head "Do you admire Nnoitra-sensei?"

His face lit up. Admire. That was a good word. "Of course. He is so smart, and draws so well… but it's disgusting… it's not natural."

"It's not natural to admire someone for what they are?"

"No… wanting to be them… to be with them… sexually." His cheeks burned red. Sun-sun sighed. "How did you get over it? It's gross… and shameful."

"It takes getting used to." She said, honestly.

They sat in silence until there was a knock on the door and Apache came to replace her.

* * *

Sun-sun was pleased with her progress. She'd have to talk to Soi Fong later about Nel, but she was sure that there would be progress. She was just considering the way things would turn out later, when she reached her house and walked straight into a scene of a soap opera.

Her father was yelling. Menoli was yelling. Momo was trying to calm them both down, but father and daughter were facing off in an amazing breakdown.

"I will not have you talk that way!" her sister yelled "First of all, you have no right to plow through my stuff. Second, this isn't even mine!" she screamed as she pointed towards something.

"Oh, Sun-sun…" Momo rushed towards her, hair flying and eyes wild "Please try to convince your sister to tell the truth."

"What's going on?" Sun-sun asked. Both her father and sister turned around to glare at her murderously.

"What do you know of this?" Aizen Sosuke asked as he held up a stick-like thing that looked awfully like a… a pregnancy test? Sun-sun had only seen one on the movies, but she guessed it was something like that.

"Is that a pregnancy test?" she asked dumbly.

"Yes. A positive one." Momo shook her hands "Dearest, you need to do something. Your father found it in your sisters' bathroom and he thinks it's Menoli's."

What about Loli? Both girls liked to go out at night. Hell, Sun-sun had even seen Apache sneak out once. She looked at Menoli – the girl was furious, but it was because she was caught in a corner, not because she was guilty.

"I've never seen this before." She said honestly.

"Yeah?" Menoli recovered quickly enough "Maybe you should take a closer look, you're the one faking your period."

Sun-sun's eyes grew wide. "What are you talking about?"

"You've got that red stuff hidden under your bed." Menoli accused, before turning to her father "She has it, daddy, go check it out for yourself."

Her father glared at Menoli, making her quiet down, before turning a speculative eye towards Sun-sun. He eyed her delicate figure, the narrow waist and wide hips, looking for signs of pregnancy. Sun-sun had never been sick. Her skin and hair were flawless. She didn't throw up every meal, or eat like a ravenous wolf. Still, there was a shadow of doubt in his eyes, one that seemed to be clouding over his reason.

"Momo." He said slowly "Go up to Sun-sun's room and see if there is such a bottle."

Her step mother scrambled up, stumbling over her own two feet, as Sun-sun and her father stared down. Now that she was off the hook, Menoli was standing by the side, looking at them with narrow, shrewd eyes, grinning triumphantly at having escaped trouble. This time.

Sun-sun knew what would happen. Even if she told her father the truth, that she'd miraculously stopped getting her period during the summer, there was no way in Hell she would explain the reason why she had kept it from them. She couldn't tell them she hadn't wanted to be tested, or poked and prodded like some sort of circus animal. They wouldn't understand her disgust of those things.

And her father would never take her side, not over one of Momo's kids.

She had to stand her ground, Sun-sun decided. She knew what was going on his head. If he kicked her out, Oxford would evaporate like dust in the wind, and Luppi's chances of college as well. She could play that. She could play that….

But she couldn't. Because she saw it then and there in his eyes – he'd already killed her.

She didn't hear Momo's grief-stricken shriek from upstairs. The masks were off.


End file.
